Laying Aside Every Weight

The Bike Ride...

2010-09-14T11:18:00.003-05:00

This past Sunday evening, the weather was gorgeous outside. It was around 7:00pm and through the trees, I could see that the sun was slowly setting. All of a sudden, I decided that I wanted to go on a quick bike ride and enjoy the sunset from our gravel road. I asked a few of my sisters if they'd like to join me, but they were busy with other things and didn't really want to come. In fact, they looked at me like I was crazy! (I guess some people don't enjoy physical activity...especially spur-of-the-moment physical activity. lol) But I wasn't persuaded to stay in the house by their odd glances. I just resigned myself to the fact that I'd be going alone.

I walked down to the machine shed to grab my bike, and I found my Dad was in there working on one of our lawnmowers. He asked what I was doing, and I told him I was going on a quick bike ride. Often, it's just Dad and I that go biking together, but that night he really needed to get the lawnmower working and wasn't able to come with me.

So, I set off down the road all alone. It was so quiet and peaceful. I began to think that it was actually nice to be alone and just enjoy the beautiful sunset in silence. I decided to ride to the end of our road and sit there while the sun went down. It's so beautiful to see the sun set over the golden cornfields with all the little farm houses on the landscape. My heart was singing, "Oh, Lord - how great you are!"
But soon, my nice quiet trip turned a little sour as I was distracted by several other thoughts that kept popping into my head. "Ugh, it's so difficult to ride on gravel." "Yikes! Have all the gnats in Linn county decided to settle here? They're dive-bombing my eyes and nose. Yuck!" "When did our road get all of these hills? I wanted a nice bike ride, not a workout!"

Needless to say, my bike ride was not going as planned. My legs were burning, my eyes were watering from all of the bugs that decided to lodge there, and my hair kept blowing in my face. I could barely see the road, let alone the beautiful sunset! My mood has definitely turned from excitement to frustration. And then they came, the thoughts of defeat and compromise. "Maybe I should just turn around and go home. This isn't what I thought it was going to be, and there's another larger hill ahead. I've swallowed a million gnats and I'm getting a little sweaty. I should just turn around."

Yes, there was a battle raging in my head. What should I do? I wanted to make it to the end of the road and enjoy the sunset, but there were all of these "good reasons" to turn back. I rode awhile longer, the large hill getting ever closer, still trying to decide. And then, the Lord reminded me of something. He said, "Bekah, you can turn around if you want to. You're right - it would be easier." And He reminded me of a few areas in my life where recently I've made small compromises and I've sometimes given up when the going was getting tough. I stopped my bike and stood there for a minute, knowing that He was right. I was getting a little off track and I needed to refocus on Him. I silently prayed for His help and His strength to do those hard things. (Remember the gnats? I wasn't about to open my mouth!)
But then He encouraged me, "Press on! Ride up that hill and to the end of the road. Finish what you started to do! And let this night, this bike ride, be a reminded to you in the coming days. Whatever I have called you to do, I will work in you and through you to accomplish it."

Feeling very encouraged, I jumped back on my bike and pounded up that hill. Were there bugs? Oh, yes. Lots of them. Was it tough? Yep. Especially because I was stopped and didn't have the momentum built up. But was it worth it? Absolutely. The sunset was gorgeous. The colors were bright and so vivid, and they appeared to rest on the tops of the corn stalks at times. The wind died down and the night was deathly still. It was perfect.

Unfortunately, I didn't have my camera. But that's okay. That night was just between me and my Lord, anyway.

Snapshots

2010-09-13T07:19:00.015-05:00

Before I get around to typing my long overdue post, I thought I would upload a few pictures from this summer...mostly from the Bright Lights conferences in August. Then I'll *hopefully* get around to writing an update later this week. Enjoy!

Leah and I on the dock at Story Book Bible Camp. We went there on Thursday (relaxing day) during the crazy conference week in Duluth. It was gorgeous weather and so fun!

Playing ultimate frisbee at the camp. I was loving every minute of exercise I could get!

Canoeing with Nickie. And no, I never caused the canoe to tip. lol

Dressed up and ready for "The Counselor Skit"

My small group at the Radiant Purity conference in Duluth. We had some very good discussion times and I came away excited about how the Lord was working in their lives!

"Yes, we're sisters."

This is a horrible shot, but it's the only one I have of me kayaking. I LOVED it! I had never gone kayaking before, so it was definitely an adventure.

With Karissa before "The Conscience Skit". I love acting like a spoiled brat on stage!

My "small" group from the Cedar Rapids conference. We had a great time together!

Abby Kramer and Rachel. We had a fun time going out to dinner with Abby and Lindsay when they came to volunteer at the Bright Lights office.

Me and Lindsay!

2010-06-17T11:00:00.015-05:00

Have you ever heard of a GMO? I'll confess, I hadn't until recently. The term GMO stands for "Genetically Modified Organisms", and my older sister, Rachel, began doing some research about GMO a little over a month ago. She thought that eliminating GMO from my younger sister, Avalon's diet might balance her mood swings and help her to focus, make progress in speech and social behaviors. (For those of you who don't know my family very well, we adopted Avalon in 2008 after having her in our home through foster care since she was 20 months old. She has a significant delay in speech and social behaviors, but she is a smart girl! She amazes us academically and is a hard worker. She has a merciful, tender heart and we love her and thank the Lord for bringing her to us!)

Anyway, Rachel has read through 2 books on the subject of GMO (author - Jeffrey M. Smith), consulted with my parents, and has put Avalon (and herself) on a "GMO-free" diet for 30 days. Avalon is on day 18 right now, and to be honest, we haven't seen any major changes. But even if we don't see dramatic results on the outside, we are still planning to elimate most of the processed food that she used to eat once these 30 days are over. We've done a major overhaul in her diet, including a lot more fruits and veggies (she was a very picky eater!) and Rachel spends several hours a week baking things that she can eat. (Homemade chicken nuggets and ketchup, graham crackers, banana bread, fruit popsicles, etc.) Rachel has found some great recipes, and we've found that we prefer our homemade recipes more than store bought items!

We're also excited to see our garden plants growing bigger. (Pics above...ignore the weeds. No garden is perfect. LOL) We can rest assured that our garden produce has not been genetically modified!

I encourage you all to eat fresh this summer! Take advantage of local Farmer's Markets...grow your own garden...enjoy the delicious produce that the Lord designed for us to eat. I simply can't wait until harvest time!

Blessings,

Bekah

Family Vacation

2010-06-08T21:19:00.008-05:00

These are a few pictures from our family vacation to Des Moines last weekend! We enjoyed staying in the Adventureland hotel and swimming in the hotel pools on Friday, and then we went to the Adventureland park all of Saturday. It was great! I took the weekend off of "typical exercising" and traded in my gym shoes for a swim suit and flip flops. But it worked out great. We swam for over 3 hours on Friday, and though I didn't swim laps, it was a workout playing with Avalon and Bethany and chasing after them. (We went down the slides countless times, and climbed up stairs to get there.) And on Saturday, we walked several miles in the theme park. (I have blisters to prove it!)

I really feel awful about my lack of posting recently. This Census job is taking up more time than I thought, and blogging just hasn't been a top priority. I appreciate all of your comments and how you've hung in there with me! We have embarked on a new family diet for at least the next 30 days, and I'm planning to explain the diet in my next post. (I can't post about it quite yet, because I haven't finished reading the book. ) It's been quite the challenge...but I love how our fridge is overflowing with fresh fruits and veggies! I made some steel cut oats for breakfast and sprinkled some brown sugar and blueberries on top. Delicious! If you haven't tasted steel cut oats, you MUST! They are so much better than regular rolled oats. Rolled oats tend to be "blah" in the texture category, and steel cut have a nice, hearty texture. I'm hooked!

On a completely different note, I've been memorizing the book of Philippians recently and want to leave you with this verse. I think it sums up my prayer about my weight perfectly!

Philippians 1:20 "I eagerly expect and hope that I will in no way be ashamed, but will have sufficient courage, so that now as always Christ will be exalted in my body, whether by life or by death."

Blessings ~ Bekah

Breaking the "dry spell"

2010-05-18T14:03:00.003-05:00

The busyness of life goes in waves, and this past month has left me with very little time to even think about writing something coherent! I've sat down several times with the purpose of blogging, but then I was interrupted by something and never seemed to find my way back to my laptop........However, today will be different. I will update! Even if it takes me all day to get this typed. :-)

I've been faithful in exercising this past month and eating as healthy as possible. But I've had a few curve balls thrown my direction and I've been challenged to think creatively. For example, I'm working another job position with the Census Bureau and I had two days of training at a library in one of the many little Iowa towns. The first day, I did not pack a lunch because I assumed that I'd be able to find some sort of local restaurant that sold salads or lean meat sandwiches. Well, when I arrived that morning - I found only a small Casey's gas station. Not exactly what I was planning on! At our lunch break, I didn't have time to drive back to find the nearest Subway, so I walked down to Casey's and began looking. Yogurt? Nope. Any kind of fresh vegetables or fruit? Nada. I had to settle on a package of peanuts (protein and fat) a cheese stick (which was a healthy choice) and the most healthy granola bar I could find. I learned my lesson and packed a salad and apple the next day!
The other thing that was challenging during those two days of training was my lack of exercise. I had to leave my house at 6:45am to arrive to training by 8:00am, which didn't allow time for me to exercise before leaving. And then, I had to sit in training for two days! On the first day, I went outside at our first break and found that I could take a quick walk around the block 2 times before break time was up. And I did that at every break for those two days! I don't know what the neighbors thought, seeing me walk around their block multiple times a day. But getting outside and walking helped me to stay awake and focused as I sat through two days of boring training!

Along with silly training, I've also been challenged to "stay the course" even when my schedule didn't allow for exercising a few days. That's going to happen - that's life. But just because I couldn't jump on the treadmill or throw in a DVD doesn't mean that I couldn't get exercise that day. It was no excuse to sit around. It just meant that my exercise needed to be creative! Like last Saturday, when my "exercising" involved driving stakes into the ground and wrapping the wire garden fence around them and running the hand held tiller around the garden and in between the rows of onions. I definitely worked up a sweat! (And was covered in dirt...lol)

Life isn't going to be perfect. Things aren't always going to turn out like we planned. That's why we need to have a plan, do our best to follow it, and learn creative ways to accomplish it when we hit roadblocks. That's a lesson that I've been learning recently. When my plans for my day don't turn out like I want, do I just settle for an "okay day" or do I push myself to find different ways to make it a good day? Do I sit back and give into selfish attitudes and throw self control out the window, or do I make adjustments based on the knowledge I've attained? Would I just grab a bag of chips and a candy bar at Casey's (which did sound good) or spend 10 minutes looking through the store and try to find the most healthy choice?

Small choices add up to big results. And I'd encourage all of you to make the good small choices every day, trust the results to the Lord, and be amazed at what He'll do through you!

Happy to be back! ~Bekah

Friday Favorites...

2010-04-16T09:49:00.004-05:00

We've had quite a few days of lovely spring weather here recently (sometimes even downright hot weather!), which has prompted me to pull out my spring/summer clothes that have been packed away.

I was a little hesitant to make the switch in clothing, simply because I knew that with the weight I'd gained back this winter, the clothes were either going to be tight or not even fit at all. And that was a rather depressing thought! I wanted to ignore that fact, but it was time for me to just face reality and keep moving in the direction to change! From what I've tried on so far, all of the blouses and tops still fit (which is a blessing, because I really like them!). And I expected that they would, because, being a "pear" - the weight heads south, if ya know what I mean. :-)

But as I suspected, the Capri's, shorts, and skirts are tight in the rear-end. The only blessing I've discovered so far is that after digging through my bucket of clothes, I realized that need new Capri's anyway. So I decided to head into Kohls one afternoon and see if I could find a nice pair. Little did I know what a discouraging afternoon that would be!

I knew the style that I wanted and after grabbing a few different brands, I went into the dressing room to try them on. One after the other, I threw them into the "reject" pile as they all had different "weak points". Too tight in the thighs....too much room in the waist....not long enough....they don't sit right on my hips...too tight in the rear....etc. I was in the store for over an hour, and I'd guess that I tried on at least 8 different brands and 15 different pairs...but nothing worked. I felt like I must have the most unique body of everyone! Which normally brought comfort and appreciation, but that day brought frustration.

It was hard not to walk out of the store feeling down, with doubts swimming in my head. Not only was shopping not enjoyable, it was like a constant reminder screaming, "You've gained weight! You've gained weight! Nothing fits! You've failed!".

Now, at this point, you must be thinking, "Uh, did she forget that she was supposed to post about a favorite thing? I was hoping for another recipe. This is kinda depressing to read..." But don't bail out on me yet! My favorite thing is coming up soon. :-)

As I sat in the car and pulled away from Kohls, I was just praying that the Lord would bring a verse to mind that would encourage me and that He would help me to focus on Him instead of the thoughts of defeat. Because at that point, I was ready to go have a good cry somewhere! And He was so faithful to bring not just one verse, but a whole host of verses to mind. Snippets of Scripture like "we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us", "I have loved you with an everlasting love", " My grace is sufficient for you and my power is made perfect in your weaknesses", "you did not receive the spirit of slavery to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons", etc. And the Lord gently reminded me just because I couldn't find Capri's that day doesn't mean that I should "throw in the towel" and give into defeat. He is to be the source of my joy, my fulfillment, my security, my everything. I should not be looking to Capri's to make me happy! (Which sounds ridiculous even as I type that, but I think we do that in all different areas of our lives.) I was challenged as I realized how often I let "superficial things" determine my thoughts and emotions, which in turn determines my moods and actions. I mean, seriously - so what if the Capri's didn't fit! Was I going to allow that to steal my joy and my motivation?
By God's grace, I decided that I wasn't going to let that day be marked with defeat, but that I was going to continue walking in His strength and move on, let it go. I needed to raise a flag of surrender, but not to the store - to Christ!

So, while my attitude improved, I still had a huge hole in my wardrobe that I knew I needed to fill up pretty quickly. I decided to just make plans to head to another store as soon as it worked into my schedule and just trust the Lord about the whole thing. Well, have you noticed how the Lord loves to surprise and bless His children? I was so excited yesterday as I saw Him doing that for me.

My family was in Des Moines yesterday for a Bible Quizzing competition, and after we finished up that day, my Mom decided that we would go to Bass Pro Shop and let my little sisters have some fun looking at all of the "stuffed animals". (lol )So, we went in and the little girls absolutely loved looking around at all the different animals they have on display, especially the talking moose head. :-) And as we walked in, I noticed that they had a rather large selection of very nice women's clothing and I saw a pair of Capri's that looked really comfy and cute. So I asked Mom if it would be all right to look around a bit, and after getting the "go ahead" from her, Hannah (my resident fashion expert) and I went through the racks. And would you believe it? I walked out of that store with 2 pairs of darling, comfy Capri's and 1 pair of shorts! From the Bass Pro Shop! I've never been to that store in my life and had no idea that they sold clothes, but my Father in heaven knew, and He orchestrated our schedule so that I would be there on that day and would be able to get what I needed. I don't deserve His blessings (none of us do) but I'm so thankful that we serve a God who desires to be intimately involved in our lives and who blesses us even though we don't deserve it.

And that's my favorite thing this week - that our Lord looks past who we are and what size of clothes we wear and chooses to love and bless us even in the midst of our struggles and doubts. The Scripture says to, "Cast all your cares on Him, because He cares for you", and I praise the Lord for how He demonstrated that so clearly to me this week. I'd encourage you all to be fervent in "casting" and leave the "caring" to Him, because I think that we often do the exact opposite. We begin "caring" and worrying about our problems and try "casting" them to whoever or whatever we think can fix them, instead of simply "casting" them to Christ and leaving the results in His hands.
It's yet another lesson the Lord has be teaching me through this clothing experience. Oh, and I also learned one other valuable piece of information - don't judge a store by it's name...you might just get surprised!

~Bekah

The Attack of the Crocodile...

2010-04-13T09:38:00.002-05:00

Avalon and Bethany

What do 3 energetic little girls, 2 older sisters, a hula hoop and a beautiful spring evening have in common? The crocodile game!!!!!

Last night, Rachel and I were in charge of entertaining the munchkins as the rest of the family cleaned up after supper. Avalon, Bethany, and our 18 month old foster baby girl were eager to play outside, so we headed out to the swing set. It was a beautiful night (though rather windy, but when you live in the country - you get used to it) and after playing for about 20 minutes we were all getting a little bored. So, I decided to come up with a creative way to play! I grabbed the hula hoop and threw it as far as I could, which prompted the girls to all chase after it and see who could run the fastest and grab it first. "Hey, this might work out nicely", I thought. "What kind of game could I come up with using this hula hoop? There's only one, and I don't want to have the girls fighting over it...hmmm".

And then it hit me! The girls love to play games where they are being chased, especially when they have to run for their lives from a ferocious bear, lion, tiger, etc (aka a big sister!). So, I called the girls over to me and told them that we were going to play "the crocodile game". Their little eyes grew big and they excitedly said, "Okay!!!!". I told them the simple rules I had made up: I would be the "crocodile" and they were little fish. I was pretending that I wanted to catch and eat the little fish and the only way they could stay safe was if they ran to the hula hoop (which was lying on the ground) and jumped inside the circle. Every once in awhile, I'd run over and grab the hula hoop and throw it again, so they were forced to keep running around. It worked brilliantly! The air was soon filled with the most convincing crocodile noises you've ever heard (wait...do they make noises? Well, I decided that crocodiles must grunt and growl...lol...it added to the "scariness"). And the girls were screaming and giggling, running around our spacious "front lawn" and working together to keep the scary crocodile away from them.

It was fun, and before I knew it, I was getting a little sweaty. Nothing like a good cardio workout before bedtime. If only burning calories could be so easy and enjoyable all of the time! Running around in the grass is significantly harder than on a hard surface. (At least, I think so!) But in the excitement of the game, I forgot that I was actually running and getting exercise. I was just playing with my little sisters...something that I wouldn't have been able to do 2 years ago. When we had to go inside about 30 minutes later, I felt great - not tired at all. We could have kept playing for another hour! And that was encouraging. Sometimes when it feels like the scale just keeps showing me what I don't want to see, it's good to remember how far the Lord has brought me and all the progress that I have made. I can do things that I never would have been able to do before! My life has been changed. And now, instead of sitting on the grass and watching, I can be the big, scary crocodile and make memories alongside my sisters. And that is true success!

Growl! (Or, whatever crocodiles sounds like....) ~Bekah

Monday Musings...

2010-04-12T09:58:00.003-05:00

Have you ever been bit with the "Monday morning blahs"? Well, I woke up with a pretty severe case this morning. You might recognize the symptoms - irritability, a desire to live in denial (of the alarm clock going off!), tiredness (from staying up too late), feelings of despair (Will I ever learn?), and an overall grumpy demeanor. I didn't exactly feel like springing out of bed, especially because of what was the first thing on my schedule...exercise.

But, by God's grace, I sat up in bed, said a quick prayer for strength to do the right thing, and lay down and went back to sleep. Just kidding! :-) That's what I wanted to do, but I gathered up my things and quietly crept downstairs. It was dark...it was cold...(which are the perfect conditions for...well, what do you know?...SLEEPING!) and I didn't exactly feel like being there. However, I got changed, grabbed a glass of water and threw on my shoes, and stuck in the DVD. I knew there was no way that I'd be able to get on the treadmill this morning - I had no motivation at all! I needed someone to tell me exactly what to do, so I grabbed a difficult exercise DVD and had at it. I decided to just do it and get it over with. My attitude still hadn't improved much, but I was up and moving and focusing on more important things...like not passing out...lol (I've even been known to yell back at the trainer when they start down their "You can do it!" encouragement pep talks. This usually happens when I'm having a grumpy morning. Some days, I need to hear their encouraging words and appreciate it. But on days like today....I let them know, in no uncertain terms, that I do not wish to hear their encouragement and would like to see them actually doing the exercises with me. That would keep 'em quiet. Anyway, yes, I realize they can't hear me and that I'm just making sarcastic comments to the TV. But I like to pretend that they can. It's emotionally freeing, okay?)

So, I got through it this morning but my heart wasn't in it at all. I wanted to be anywhere but in the living room! And while I was in the shower after I finished, I was reminded of a verse that is quoted often and is one that I was taught as a young child, and a verse that I needed to apply to my life at that moment. 1 Corinthians 10:31 says, "So whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God". It was very obvious to me that I had not been "doing" for the glory of God this morning. I'd been "doing" for myself, which is why I was so grumpy and lacked motivation. When I look at doing a task for the purpose of glorifying God, my whole outlook changes. I would have pushed harder this morning and not given up so easily if I would have remembered that by dying to my flesh, I'm allowing Christ to have more control over my life, which results in God's glory. I needed to get my mind off of the fact that I was tired and focus on the fact that Jesus is my strength and that in His presence is fullness of joy!

I asked the Lord to forgive me for wasting a morning that He had made for me to love and serve Him by being a GIB (Grumpy, Irritable Blonde) and began to meditate on Scripture and simply focus on my Savior. It takes a conscience choice to do that! It doesn't just happen. There are so many different things that call for our attention, especially when we're getting up and ready for the day. But I'd encourage you - don't waste your time just "going through the motions". Make the most of the time that the Lord gives you! Don't be a GIB! (Blonde, brunette, black haired) or a GIR (redhead)!

Doing an "about-face" ~

Bekah

Friday Favorites...

2010-04-09T09:44:00.003-05:00

It was time for a change...hope you like the new background! Those of you who know me will understand that I couldn't stay away from purple for too long. :-)

This week, I decided to post another recipe that became a instant favorite with my family. "Branana Bread" was easy to make and easy to eat! We doubled the recipe and devoured it in just a few days. Being a "sneaky chef", I love how it has bran and flaxseed mixed in, but my family couldn't tell. (Success!!!!) It brings a unique twist to regular banana bread and has been slightly altered to aid those of us who are calorie conscience. :-) Here is the recipe so you can give it a try:

Moist and delicious chocolate-chip banana bread with bran and flax.

Makes 1 large loaf, 16 pieces (Cut loaf into 8 thick slices and then cut each slice in half)

Per slice: 174 calories, 6.2 g total fat (1.8 g saturated fat), 6 g protein, 27 g carbohydrate, 3.5 g fiber, 31 mg cholesterol, 159 mg sodium

Ingredients
2 cups Robin Hood Nutri-Flour Blend (or 1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour mixed with 1/2 cup wheat bran)
1/3 cup granulated sugar
1/4 cup ground flaxseed or flaxmeal
1 teaspoon each baking soda and baking powder
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 1/4 cups mashed RIPE bananas
3/4 cup plain yogurt (2%)
2 eggs
2 tablespoons butter, melted
1 teaspoon vanilla
1/2 cup chopped walnuts
1/3 cup mini semi-sweet chocolate chips

Directions
1.Preheat oven to 350ºF. Spray a 9 x 5-inch loaf pan lightly with cooking spray and set aside.
2.In a large bowl, combine flour, ground flax, sugar, baking soda, baking powder, cinnamon and salt.
3.In a medium bowl, whisk together bananas, yogurt, eggs, butter and vanilla. Add wet ingredients to dry ingredients and stir just until moistened. Fold in nuts and chocolate chips, being careful not to overmix the batter.
4.Spoon batter into prepared pan. Bake for about 50 minutes, or until wooden skewer inserted in center of loaf comes out clean. Let cool in pan for 10 minutes. Remove loaf from pan and cool completely on a wire rack. Slice and serve or wrap tightly with plastic wrap and store at room temperature.
5.Tip: The bananas must be very, very ripe (sweet!) for this banana bread as there’s very little added sugar.

Now, I changed the recipe just a bit by using coconut oil instead of butter, unrefined sugar instead of white, whole wheat flour, and I dumped a generous amount of flax seed in. And it tasted great!

For those of you who are watching your calories (like me!) let me warn you that I would only advise you to make this if there are other people in the house to help you eat it. Otherwise, I know you'll be tempted to consume WAY too much of this. Most weight loss programs advise people to stay away from "baked goods", because of the higher calories per serving - you can't eat as much as you'd like. (One little piece of bread doesn't seem like it holds many calories, but it does!) So if baked goods are big a temptation for you, I'd suggest either:
-make a batch of this, cut it into single slice servings and then freeze them. That way, you can pull out a single piece at a time and not be tempted when staring at a whole loaf of the bread.
-make the batch and share it with family, friends, neighbors, etc
-or...just skip this all together! Yummy recipe, but would you rather shrink your waist size or eat a loaf of branana bread? That is the question. :-)

You see, I have found this out the hard way several times. Baked goods are a huge temptation for me! Especially when they are healthy baked goods, full of good fats and whole wheat. It's easy to think, "This is so healthy! How can it be wrong to eat some?" But the truth is -eating too much of anything is not good for our bodies. Whether it's branana bread or carrots, it doesn't matter! Our stomach wasn't designed to stretch out of proportion just so that we can satisfy our taste buds and the lust of our eyes. (Preaching to myself here!)

Anyway, if you want to practice self control - make yourself a batch and PRAY! LOL Otherwise, don't set yourself up for failure. Make a batch and freeze it or share it.

Have a great weekend everyone ~ Bekah

Sneak Peek

2010-04-06T14:03:00.002-05:00

*This is an excerpt from a section of my book that I've been working on the past few weeks, and I decided that instead of thinking up something new to post, I'd just give you a sneak peek. This snippet picks up in the middle of a chapter, but I didn't want to post the whole thing. Again, this is a very, very, very ROUGH draft...but any thoughts would be appreciated. :-)*

Finally, at age 15, I was frustrated enough with how I looked, that I pushed aside my pride and asked for some help. I had reached a point of desperation and I decided that I wanted to do something about my weight. My mom knew exactly what I was going through, as she has struggled with her weight in her adult years, as well. And I think that having family members who are also overweight took away some of the shame and embarrassment that I might have experienced. I’m not the only one in my family who has struggled with weight. In fact, I come from a long line of large women. My family history most definitely played a part in my weight issue, by giving me a slower metabolism and a body type that stores most of my fat in my hips and derriere. But I knew that I couldn’t simply blame my size on my genetics. I was the one who ate too much, the one who didn’t like to exercise, and the one who made unhealthy choices over and over again. My genetics had nothing to do with that.

After listening to me pour out my frustrations and honest feelings about my weight, my mom suggested that we go and visit a dietician together. She hoped that I would be able to ask questions and acquire valuable information about nutrition and healthy living in general, and that I would be able to apply that knowledge to my every day life. I wasn’t opposed to the idea (though I thought it would be rather embarrassing and prayed that none of my friends would find out!) and so she set up an appointment for me that spring.
As we walked into the office, I remember thinking that it looked rather uninviting. With white walls and few pieces of artwork, it appeared “sterile” and “professional”, not a place where I felt comfortable discussing personal matters. “This place needs some color, some life.”, I decided. “I hope the dietician is more interesting than this room!”.
When my name was called, my mom and I went into a tiny, white room with the tiny, white dietician (sorry, couldn’t resist!) and sat down. I remember that our knees were touching because the space was so small, and I thought it rather dumb that the had such small rooms when they spend most of their day counseling large, overweight people! Anyway, after exchanging pleasantries, the dietician looked at me and asked me why I had come. “Isn’t it obvious?”, I thought, and it was all I could do to restrain my tongue from speaking any of the sarcastic remarks that flooded my mind. But I simply responded that I wanted to lose weight and hoped that she could give me some information about how to do that. I explained that I knew the basics of nutrition (my parents were faithful to pass on that information to me!) but I didn’t know how to apply that knowledge and lose weight.
So, for the next 30 minutes, the dietician discussed with me how to make healthy meal choices, the appropriate amount of food to eat at each meal, and how to incorporate this information into my every day life. She was a very nice, understanding women and did give me a lot of good information. She also encouraged me to get more exercise and to find something active that I enjoyed doing. I made a goal to exercise for 30 minutes every day, and to keep track of what I was eating each meal by using a chart that helped me to choose foods that would comprise a balanced meal. I can recall looking at her “play food” that was to represent portion sizes and thinking, “I usually eat 2 to 3 times that amount! Could I really eat that little and feel satisfied?“ But she assured me that as I changed my habits, my body would also change and get used to eating that amount.
As I expected, the most uncomfortable part of the visit was when she asked me to step on the scale. I remember feeling my cheeks flush and turn bright red as the dietician told me that my weight was 218 pounds, enough to put me in the “very obese” category. “I’m 15 years old!”, I was thinking. “How can I be this fat?”. Needless to say, I was beyond embarrassed. I was horrified and overwhelmed. She encouraged me that I was doing the right thing by coming to see her, that I was taking the first step in my journey of becoming more healthy. I had a graph to chart my progress when I weighed in every week. We decided on another goal that I would lose 5 pounds by the time of our next appointment (5 weeks later) and I left the office feeling excited about beginning this program. Knowledge is power, and I felt like I had the keys to success in my hands as we walked out to the car that day.

My mom and I had a great talk as we drove home, and she committed to helping me in whatever way I needed it. Having taught classes at our church on weight loss before, she was a wealth of information for me and answered a lot of my questions. We talked about how to arrange my schedule to allow me to spend some time exercising each day, and she said that she’d do her best to serve balanced, healthy meals. I had a huge support system in my family, but my mom became my biggest cheerleader and my own personal coach. (And she still is to this day!)

For the next 2 weeks, I was motivated and enthusiastic about meeting this new goal of losing weight. I faithfully went outside and took walks, or ran short (very short) distances in the afternoons. I really had no idea how to exercise effectively, but I would often grab my mom’s pea green 3 pound weights and go up to my bedroom to work out. I performed mostly simple arm exercises and stretches, with a few jumping jacks thrown in. But for me, it wasn’t the intensity of the work that matter. Just the fact that I was faithful in doing some exercise was a great accomplishment.

And I started seeing results. My clothes began to fit a little better. I was able to squeeze back into a dress that was becoming too tight to wear. I was making progress, and I was thrilled. I could tell that my arms did have muscles in them and that my legs were stronger than I thought. Those first 2 weeks were great.

Friday Favorites...

2010-04-02T10:32:00.002-05:00

I've been so excited this past week, as I've been able to try out several new recipes that I've come across. Most of them I copied from a "Taste of Home" magazine that I was browsing through will sitting here at the library. I've made 3 different recipes and have enjoyed them all! They are all simple, yummy, and healthy. (Which also happen to be my top three criteria for recipes!) Today, I'm going to share with you a "Barley and Bean" salad that I made last night. It was great! Super easy to throw together, and full of protein and fiber. (As a side note, I'll tell you that my family didn't necessarily care for the full "olive oil" flavor, and if you aren't quite accustomed to it either, you may want to add more of the seasonings or just not put quite as much olive oil in. )

Bean and Barley Salad

3/4 C. quick cooking barley

1 Can kidney beans, rinsed and drained

1 Can black beans, rinsed and drained

1 can whole kernel corn, drained

1 large sweet red pepper, finely chopped

6 green onions, chopped

1/3 C. fresh cilantro

Dressing:

3/4 C. olive oil

1/3 C. red wine vinegar

2 garlic cloves, minced

1 1/2 tsp. chili powder

3/4 tsp. salt

3/4 tsp. ground cumin

1/4 to 1/2 tsp. crushed red pepper flakes

1/4 tsp. pepper

Prepare barley according to package instructions. Transfer to large bowl; stir in beans, corn, red pepper, onion, and cilantro. In a small bowl, combine the dressing ingredients. Pour over salad and toss to coat. Chill before serving! Yummy to eat with pita chips.

Give it a try and tell me what you think!

Bekah

Jumping rope and having fun...

2010-03-31T09:23:00.004-05:00

Did you ever jump rope when you were a little girl? I can remember playing in our driveway and jumping rope with my sisters and our neighborhood friends. It was always so much more enjoyable if we could get a group of people together so that we could switch off between jumping and turning the rope. And do you remember those silly rhymes that you learned to recite while turning the rope? Rhymes that didn't seem to make any sense and had no correlation with jumping rope whatsoever? :-) We finally gave up on the rhymes and decided that it would be fun if we counted our jumps and tried to beat each other. I, for one, was just glad every time that the rope went back up over my head and didn't get caught on my ankle. I was much better at jumping rope by myself, because I was in control of the rope speed and would keep it at a nice, steady pace. In my view, my sisters and friends seemed to think that the rope was burning their hands, because they would turn that thing so fast it would make the cool "whirring" sound in the air! How was anybody supposed to jump that fast? Yeah, I still have a few scars on my ankles from those rope burns I got.....

Just kidding. :-) No rope scars here. But this morning, I decided to take advantage of the cardio workout that jump roping gives you. After completing my running on the treadmill, I grabbed my jump rope and ran out to the garage to get some jumping done. (I went outside because I didn't want to wake up everyone else with the slapping sound the rope makes on our ceilings. It's just not quite tall enough for my jump rope.)
After kicking the curious cats out of the way, (gently...sort of... lol) I started jumping. And it was fun! My heart was pumping and my calves were burning. (Not "calves" like in little cows, mind you. "Calves" as in the muscles in the back of my legs. Don't worry - I wasn't sacrificing anything on the altar of our chest freezer in the garage! Just wanted to clarify that...)
Then, I decided to really make my heart rate soar by doing 30 reps of stair stepping (like where you use one step and step up and off of it as fast as you can -it ends up more like step running) and then performing 50 reps of jump rope. Going back and forth between that for several minutes was enough to make me begin gasping for air! But it was fun. Really, it was! You should try it sometime.

Often times, those silly little games we learn as children can be fun even now. (Except for "jacks". I never did understand the point of that game...) But think about it - bike riding, tag, roller blading, hopscotch, jumping rope, and any kind of sports game kept us entertained for hours and a healthy weight as kids. So why have we given them up? Because we're too old for them? I say, let's resurrect them! I mean, can you imagine how much fun it would be to grab a group of your friends and go roller blading? Or heading to the basketball court or the soccer field? Who cares if you're not in the greatest shape and don't have quite the same amount of energy that you did as a child? I guarantee you that memories would be made, and you'd be burning calories at the same time.

So, I challenge you to "play" a little bit today. Besides, kids have more fun anyway, right? lol

Bekah

Monday Musings...

2010-03-29T09:28:00.003-05:00

As you all know, we'll be celebrating the resurrection of our Lord this coming Sunday. What a joyous time for the believer! Jesus' resurrection means everything to us. As Paul writes in 1 Corinthians chapter 15:17, "If Christ has not been raised, your faith is futile, you are still in your sins." But we know that He has been raised and because of Him, we also have been given life...eternal life. Makes me want to break out into the classic song, "Because He Lives"!

So, while this is a time of rejoicing for the believer, the world celebrates with bunnies, chocolate, and Easter eggs. And it can be very tempting to take advantage of those sales on chocolate and indulge a bit too much in traditional, festive foods. For those of us trying to lose weight, holidays are one of our greatest downfalls. It's so easy to overindulge, and when you mix the nostalgic emotions with the abundance of yummy food, the result is often disastrous.

Knowing that next weekend could be a tough challenge for a lot of us, here are a few quick tips to curbing that emotional eating :

-Don't go to the table "starving". It's better to eat a light snack of fruits, veggies, or nuts about an hour or so before sitting down to a large meal. This will help you to eat mindfully you'll be in a much better state of mind if your stomach isn't making loud noises!

-Drink lots of water. It's important to stay hydrated at all times, but especially during times when you know you'll be tempted to eat more. Often times, we mistake our body's signal for thirst and actually think that we're hungry, when all we need is a glass of water!

-Steer clear of tempting situations! For example, if you know that you'll be tempted to sneak a few extra bits of food, don't offer to clean up the food. Instead, offer to do the dishes or sweep the floor.

-Decide before sitting down to the meal what you're going to eat. Prior planning is important!

-Eat slowly, and pick foods that are full of protein and fiber. Stay away from foods full of sugar or fat. They only increase your blood sugar levels and make you crave more! If you are disciplined enough to be satisfied with one bite, great! But if not, don't even open the door for that temptation.

-Finally, just be smart and know yourself. Eating one little piece of dark chocolate isn't going to cause a major weight gain, but eating several little pieces could. Know your strengths and weaknesses, and ask the Lord to help you practice self-control!

I'm thanking the Lord that because of His death and resurrection, He has given me the power (His power!) to overcome my sin and the struggles that I still encounter each day. He has made it possible for me to be dead to sin and alive in Him! So it would be foolish of me to spend a day reserved for rejoicing in His life by indulging in my flesh, don't you think?

Life is worth the living, just because He lives!
Bekah

Friday Favorites

2010-03-26T10:17:00.003-05:00

It's time for Friday Favorites, and I'm excited about this post because I love healthy snacks! I really enjoy experimenting with different combinations of things, like sweet and salty. Keeping things new and interesting can help to fight off those cravings that we all experience at times, and it's important to have a game plan for your snacking! But before I get ahead of myself, let me give you my current Top Ten Snacks (in no particular order):

-1 serving/handful of raw nuts (almonds, pecans, walnuts, sesame seeds, any kind of nuts)

-carrots with 2 tbsp hummus

-2 stalks of celery with 1 tbsp natural peanut butter

- 1/2 C. plain yogurt with either fresh fruit, a sprinkle of granola, or some honey mixed in (I also recently experimented with mixing a tbsp of Nutella into some plain yogurt and it tasted like chocolate pudding to me, but was much healthier!)

-A Kashi granola bar or Larabar (I prefer the Larabars because they use whole ingredients and have no sugar or preservatives added to them. If you haven't tried one, you just have to! The downside is, they are more expensive (over $1 per bar) and I can only eat half of one because they are too many calories for my "snack budget". But I absolutely love them!)

- 1/2 cup of low-fat cottage cheese

-2 or 3 plain (or salted) rice cakes

-a piece of fruit (apple, grapes, banana, peach, anything!) with a few nuts

-one string cheese

-8 oz. almond milk with a Wasa cracker

Most people are often surprised when they hear that snacking actually aids in weight loss, but that's simply because we so often abuse snacking and treat it more like a meal. I mean, that's what I used to do! I would "snack" until I was full, on things like crackers, (which are loaded with salt, MSG, and preservatives so that our body craves more than we need) granola bars and fruit snacks (can you say, "sugar"?) and anything else I could find in the pantry.

But snacking should be different, whether we want to lose weight or just continue being healthy. Eating a healthy snack will rev up your metabolism and keep your hunger in check. It's better to eat a small snack and a balanced dinner, then to skip the snack and eat a large dinner! Why? Because you will *almost always* consume more calories at dinner when you are "starving", you'll more easily give into temptations and cravings when your blood sugar is unbalanced, (from not stabilizing it with a snack) and eating a large meal at night doesn't allow for any time for burn off those extra calories before heading to bed.

Here are some things you should watch out for when snacking :
1. Portion size - read the label! It's very easy to ingest more calories than you think, especially with crackers, pretzels, etc. If you think the serving size is unreasonably small, that might be a hint that you've been "over snacking" in the past. :-)
2. Pick something with protein. Do you want to feel satisfied and not sluggish after snacking? Then eat something with a good amount of protein in it (i.e. nuts, lowfat cheese or yogurt).
3. Eat your veggies and fruits! They are low in calories and high in fiber - which is a winning snack combo, and I would suggest pairing them with something like peanut (or almond) butter or hummus which will add some protein to the mix and keep you satisfied till dinner.

And finally, what should we do about cravings? We all have them, and sometimes it's REALLY HARD to resist them. (Don't even get me started on chocolate...) In order to curb those cravings, we have to realize why we get them in the first place.
Food cravings mean that our body has it's signals mixed up. We usually get cravings when we're tired or blue, when we have low levels of blood sugar and/or serotonin and the body is telling us that we need a "pick me up". Then our emotions kick in, and we begin to crave something that will make us feel good (which usually isn't something healthy!) like a high-carb or high-sugar snack. Real hunger can wait...cravings cannot. Our bodies may, in fact, be hungry and need food. But we certainly don't need a candy bar or bag of chips! That will only make us feel worse after we've eaten it, and with no fiber or protein, it doesn't satisfy at all.

So, how should we fight those cravings? First, just wait. If it's an emotional or psycological craving, it will go away. Drink a glass of water. Pray and surrender your emotions to the Lord. Get busy doing something that will take your mind off of it. Go for a walk and get some exercise. Make sure you're eating every 3 to 4 hours to keep your blood sugar levels stable. And most importantly, get it out of your sight! Don't hang around where you can see exactly what you want to indulge in, because you're just setting yourself up for failure.

And finally, please comment and share with us a few of your favorite healthy snacks! There are so many more than the few that I just listed here and I would appreciate some new ideas.

Happy Snacking!
Bekah

Polling closed...more recipes on the way!

2010-03-23T09:32:00.003-05:00

Okay, ladies. The poll is now closed and I grateful to those of you who took part in it! As I mentioned yesterday, I'll be posting my "Top Ten" snack ideas on Friday, and I'd love for you to comment and add your snack favorites, as well! Are you a crunchy, salty kind of person? Or do you prefer sweet, chewy stuff? Or, like me, does it often depend on the day? I know that there are some people who don't usually even eat snacks, but I'll share why (for weight loss purposes) snacking can actually increase your success.

After looking at the poll results, I'll be making an effort to include more of my favorite recipes as I post. I love cooking so I'm happy to share what I like to eat. I tend to be a "dump chef" of sorts, mixing and adding things to recipes and altering them when I feel like it. But I'll make sure and post recipes that I've personally tried and can confidently pass on to you. (Because there is nothing worse then trying a new recipe you saw in a magazine or read in a book and finding that, though the picture of it looks delicious, the actual taste resembles cardboard. Blech!) I'll do my best to post a variety of things, from main dishes to desserts. (Yes, there are a few healthy desserts in the world!) And as always, I'd love to hear from you. Sometimes I find cookbooks to be a little intimidating, as there are so many different choices and I'm not sure exactly what will taste good! So if we can share our favorite recipes together, we'll all benefit. :-)

Until Friday, then ~
Bekah

Monday Musings

2010-03-22T13:12:00.002-05:00

Well, I'm sure you've heard by now. The Health Care Reform Bill has passed both the House ans the Senate and will soon be signed into law by President Obama. Though I am NOT happy about this, my post today is not going to be about the specific policies of the bill, as I could wax eloquent (or, not so eloquent) for quite some time and that would be of no value as I cannot change anything about it by writing on this blog. :-)
Rather, I'd like to use the passage of this bill (and the ramifications that will follow) as a reminder to all of us that we need to be doing everything possible to take care our our own bodies. If we don't like the health care policies that passed, then we'd better make sure that we are doing everything in our power so that we won't need to rely on their socialist health care system!

The passage of this bill should motivate us even more to make our health and well being a top priority in our lives. I don't want to have to worry about whether or not I'll be able to see a specialist or even get an appointment scheduled with my family physician in a timely manner so that they can address my health issues. I don't want to be on prescription drugs and have to worry about the cost rising or drug rationing if I can help it! So I'm going to make smart choices, and I hope that you will, too!

Exercise has so many health benefits...so get off the couch and start to experience those benefits! It dramatically reduces your risk of many common health issues, such as high blood pressure, heart disease, stroke, diabetes, arthritis, obesity, and so many more. I, personally, want to reduce those risks as much as possible! Especially because my extended family has a history of high blood pressure, high cholesterol, and heart attacks. I'm aware of that and doing my best to change that history for the better in the coming generations.

Again I say, make healthy food choices. Chuck the junk! And choose the fresh - fresh veggies and fruit, protein and breads. In my post this Friday, I'm going to share with you my current "Top Ten" snack ideas, so check back for that! Experiment with new recipes and create some family favorites of your own. Reduce the times that you spend eating out, especially at fast food restaurants. I haven't had a french fry in over two years, and I'm doing just fine. :-) Plan ahead if you're going to be away from home during meal times and pack a meal. It's not hard! You just have to think ahead. Keep fresh veggies and fruits cleaned and cut up in your fridge that you can grab when you need them. I understand - sometimes you need something really quickly! But instead of grabbing for the cookies or chips, grab the apple slices with a bit of peanut butter or carrot sticks with hummus. (Oops! I guess I won't count those ideas in my "Top Ten" now that I spilled the beans...lol)

And finally, remember that God is in control. Stress, anger, bitterness, fear, and worry also have very negative effects on our bodies, so don't let them overwhelm you! Spend time studying and meditating on Scripture and allows His Word to cleanse your mind. Trust Him and obey, knowing that He created our bodies and can take care of them much better than any government program could ever promise to!

Trusting,
Bekah

Friday Favorites...

2010-03-20T11:00:00.003-05:00

Though I am not excited about the snow fall we received last night, it is perfect timing for this post. I've wanted to share this delicious soup recipe ever since I made it 2 weeks ago, but it seemed like a silly time to post a soup recipe because the weather was turning warmer. However, it's a perfect day to make a big batch of soup, so if you don't have a supper plan - consider making this!

Hearty Minestrone Soup

I found this recipe in a "Taste of Home" magazine and thought it looked super easy and very healthy. It also happens to be very tasty! I made a large batch, and I honestly assumed that my family wouldn't care for it because it doesn't have any meat in it and it calls for a lot of different spices. My plan was to freeze the soup and then take it out of the freezer for a quick meal, should I need one. So I was very surprised to find half of the pot of soup GONE, as I returned home one evening after making it. Turns out, my family loved it! My dad said it was so good that he hardly noticed the lack of meat. (And that is saying a lot from him, a self proclaimed "carnivore". LOL)

1 large onion
3 Tbsp E.V.O.O. (olive oil)
2 celery ribs
2 large carrots
1 C. chopped cabbage
1 medium green pepper
1 medium zucchini
6 garlic cloves
3 1/2 C. water
2 cans (14 1/2 oz. each) diced tomatoes, undrained
1 can garbanzo beans, rinsed and drained
1 can tomato puree (15 oz)
1 can tomato sauce (8 oz)
3 tbsp parsley flakes
2 tsp. basil
2 tsp. oregano
1 tsp. salt
1/2 tsp. pepper
1/4 tsp. cayenne pepper
1/2 C. small pasta shells

Saute onion in oil for 2 minutes. Add the other veggies and garlic and saute for 3 minutes longer. Stir in the water, tomatoes, beans, tomato puree, tomato sauce, and seasonings. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat; cover and simmer for 15 minutes.
Stir in pasta and cook for 12 to 15 minutes.

That's the recipe. And I stuck to it for the most part, but made a few changes. For example, we didn't have any garbanzo beans and I didn't think one can would be enough for me (I like beans!) so I dumped in 2 cans of kidney beans. Also, we didn't have any fresh cabbage or zucchini on hand, so I used 1/2 bag of coleslaw salad we had frozen (for the purpose of putting it in a soup some day!) and some frozen zucchini. That worked great! I'm pretty sure that I put in more carrots and celery that it called for, too. I wanted that soup to be full of veggies!
And, I added more salt than the recipe called for, and I think I dumped in more cayenne pepper, too. Basically, I would suggest that you use the recipe as a guideline and personalize the soup how your family would like it!

Enjoy!

Please vote!

2010-03-16T11:29:00.002-05:00

Hey ladies!

You have hopefully noticed the poll that I'm conducting for the next week or so. I put it right at the top of my page so as to capture your attention. I would love to hear from the masses (okay, the committed few!) of you who take time to read this blog because I want to make sure that I'm being an encouragement and help to you, and not just taking up your precious time by writing things you don't really care about. Make sense? Great! Then, please vote. You don't have to have a Google account to do so...you just have to click. And you can vote for more than one thing, so pick your top two or three. Info like this will help to eliminate the mental block( "Hmmm...what should I write about?") that I often experience. And it will give me a better understanding of what kind of things are fun to read and a blessing to you.

So, exercise your right to make your voice heard - and vote!

Monday Musings...

2010-03-15T10:28:00.002-05:00

"Have you ever tried going on a juice fast?"

Thank you again, to Hannah, for commenting and asking that question. I appreciate your willingness to comment to encourage me and to offer some helpful information! I'm constantly amazed at how many people read this blog (there are more of you than I realize!) and am so blessed by those of you who take the time to write.

So, to answer Hannah's question. Why haven't I ever tried a juice fast? It's an easy diet, in that you don't need a lot of different meal plans or recipes. You just drink juice, veggie and fruit juice. The best way to do it is if you juice the fresh produce yourself, instead of buying juice from the store. It can be a great way to cleanse your body of toxins and boost your immune system. And because fresh produce doesn't contain many calories, your body automatically loses weight because it is forced to use up the fat stores in order to supply enough fuel for the body to function. It's an excellent question and I have a lot of respect for those who have done these types of fasts. I've seen people who have had amazing results - so why wouldn't I like to try it and get results like that?

Well, my reason is purely my opinion and it simply reflects where I am at in my spiritual journey and my physical journey right now. Though I am focusing on losing weight, at the same time, I'm not focusing on losing weight. That's a very confusing statement, so let me explain. I want my body to be pleasing to the Lord. I want to be in good physical shape and I want to treat my body as a temple of the Holy Spirit. I don't want anything about my flesh to hinder me from the work He has for me to do. I'm striving to get to a place where my weight is healthy, that I'm not putting myself at risk for certain ailments caused by excess amounts of fat on the body. In short, I want to be directing people to Christ with all that I am, including my physical health. This goal is important to me, and though I'm not striving for the "perfect body" (which doesn't exist anyway) I am striving to be healthy. For me, that means losing about 20 more pounds.

But even more than losing weight, this is a spiritual journey. Since day one, the Lord has been working on my heart, exposing my sin and wrong thinking about Him, about food, about my body, about pride, and so many other things. And in His eyes, my spiritual growth is the most important thing. At the end of the day and in light of eternity, my weight doesn't matter. And recently, He's been showing me (again!) that if my heart is right before Him, everything else will fall into place - including my weight. If I'm abiding in His presence, I'm not going to fall prey to emotional eating, because my emotions are surrendered to Him and under the Spirit's control. If I'm seeking Him with my whole heart, I'm going to work hard in everything and be disciplined in exercising and correctly dealing with stress.
My eyes keep getting off track, and the Lord has been faithfully reminding me -"Bekah, I AM THE KEY TO YOUR SUCCESS!!!" It's not a specific diet or exercise regimen. IT'S ME!". And right now, I need to "let go and let God". I'm seeking to use the knowledge He's given me to make the right choices and stop stressing about the number that pops up on the scale. Because of that, I'm not looking to go on any diets or fasts right now. The Lord is challenging me to live my daily life and glorify Him in that. To move past the cravings and into His arms!

So, please don't think that I am against juice fasts! I'm not, and I may do one someday. But right now, it's not for me. I've got work to do in surrendering my daily food choices and habits, and it would be easier for me to "deny myself" certain foods and just stick to juice. I could do that. It would be tough ('cause last time I checked, chocolate isn't from a fruit...lol) but I know myself well enough to realize that I need to get my flesh submitting to the Spirit in the daily things. Because once I would go off of the juice fast, I might be 5 pounds lighter, but I'll pack them right back on if I can't get my day-to-day living under control.

I hope that makes some sense! And I'm glad you asked, Hannah. To be honest, I'd recently been thinking about doing something like that....until the Lord showed me that I was looking for the "easy way out".

And again, this is different for everyone! If the Lord speaks to you and asks you to do a juice fast, them be obedient and do it. But He's pushed the "hold" button for me on that right now.

I'll conclude with some passages from Romans chapter 8 that have been ministering to me these past few weeks. Praise the Lord for His written word!
"You, however, are not in the flesh but in the Spirit"........"For all who are lead by the Spirit of God are sons of God"....."Likewise, the Spirit helps us in our weakness.".........."No, we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us."

Finding Him faithful,
Bekah

Friday Favorites...

2010-03-12T12:54:00.003-06:00

Happy Friday, everyone! I hope you've had a wonderful week. The reason for the lack of posts this past week is because I was out of town, soaking up the warm sunshine in Missouri. It only took me about a day to realize that I didn't need to wear my winter coat while we were down there, and being out in the fresh air was energizing. I simply can't wait for spring to arrive!

While in Missouri, I was reminded of how fun it is to go roller skating. And because I had such a wonderful time, my favorite thing this week is roller skating! My two sisters (Hannah and Leah) and I were in MO for a Bible Quizzing tournament, and once the quizzing was over for the weekend, everyone headed over to the rink for some more fun and fellowship. I hadn't gone roller skating in years, and it took me a few minutes to remember the technique of how to stay upright (I only slipped once...lol) but after that, I took off - and there was no stopping me! It was so enjoyable, and a different kind of exercise than my normal routine. I actually worked up a sweat after roller skating for two hours! And now, I'm hooked. I might even try to get over to our local roller rink sometime soon. I wish that I had some pictures that I could upload, but the lighting was so awful that our pictures wouldn't turn out.

Even though it was a great trip, it was still kind of tough. I hardly got any exercise that whole week, and during the days of quizzing it's just a lot of sitting. So, I tried to stand and walk whenever possible....always took the stairs...and drank a lot of water. That's why I was so excited to go roller skating! I was able to get up and moving for 2 hours, and it felt great.
But our eating schedule was different, and we had to eat out twice a day. I made the smartest choices that I could and ate until satisfied, which was the only way to keep from completely falling off course. After spending a few days with new friends and eating out with them, one commented, "Wow, you sure like salads!".

I'm doing my best to reach my 5 pound weight loss goal for this month, and I'm really hoping that week off doesn't screw things up. I've managed to exercise every day this week, even getting up at 5:30am one morning so that I could fit it in before the busyness of the day began. I'm trying hard! And boy, I can tell. Just a few sore muscles right now...which means it's working. *smile*

Smiling because of Him,
Bekah

P.S. Hannah, thanks for commenting! I'm planning to post an answer on Monday. :-)

Monday Musings...

2010-03-01T10:23:00.002-06:00

And now, the moment you've all been waiting for! (drum roll, please)

Well, okay. It's at least the moment that I've been waiting for (and yet, also dreading). My month long challenge is over, and I weighed in this earlier this morning. It took me awhile to force my eyes to open up and look down at the red number on the scale, but once I did, I was genuinely pleased. Though I did not reach my "crazy goal" of losing 10 pounds this month, I did lose 4 pounds. And I was very happy with that! A pound a week isn't bad at all.

February was a good month, but it had it's share of bumps along the way. Some days I felt very motivated to exercise, other days I didn't. Some days I felt full and satisfied, other days it seemed that I was constantly hungry. But I loved having this goal in front of me, and it was very motivating to know that I'd be reporting my weight loss to all of you at the end of the month!

And because of that, I've decided to make another goal. This time, for the month of March. It will be slightly different this time, because I'm not going to make it so outrageous. But it will still be challenging, especially as I've taken a temporary job (8 weeks, 15 hours a week) and finding time to exercise will be slightly more difficult. I'm going to have to get creative, and most likely, I'm going to have to wake up earlier in the morning to get my exercising done. That doesn't sound very fun to me, but I know that it will be worth it!

This month, my goal is to lose 5 pounds. I think that I can do it, and I'm going to work hard to achieve it! My mom and I were discussing recently how I've gained about 10 pounds back this winter, and that has been very discouraging to me. I believe this is because I'm not nearly as active throughout the day, like I am in the spring and summer when the weather outside in nice. So naturally, it's easy to pack on extra pounds. That's why I'm trying to force myself to be more motivated and conscience about the decisions that I make every day. And I think that making small, reasonable goals (and working hard to achieve them!) will help me get this extra "winter insulation" off.

So, here I go again! I've got a goal to work toward.....and lots of work to do. I'm rejoicing in what I was able to accomplish this past month and hoping for great things upcoming month.

Happy March! (And Happy 20 days till spring!)

Bekah

Friday Favorites...

2010-02-26T16:54:00.003-06:00

My favorite thing this week is that I'm on the home stretch! Only 2 more days to burn calories before my month-long challenge is over. I'm excited and nervous to get on the scale Monday morning. It seems like this month has flown by! (Didn't I just post about starting this challenge?) I'm hoping to have lost at least 4 pounds, which would be one for every week. And that sounds reasonable, but you never know with weight loss. To be honest, I'll be happy with even 1 pound of weight loss. But, the more the merrier, ya know! :-)

So, I'm watching my calories extra closely, making sure I'm getting enough protein, and moving as much as possible. This hasn't been an easy month, but I'm so glad that I made up this crazy challenge. It has certainly provided motivation! Sometimes we all just need a little kick in the pants...especially me. LOL

Working hard...the end is in sight!
Bekah

Monday Musings...

2010-02-22T12:26:00.005-06:00

Do you have any silly fears? I've had a few (okay, several) in my lifetime. For instance, I'm scared of loud noises. I've been known to plug my ears at the movie theater because it was "so loud". I've even vacuumed while using one hand to plug one ear. And when I was little, I hated, dreaded, and avoided at all costs commercial bathrooms. It was bad enough to have your ears blasted by those sucking, swirling vortexes that could grab you and pull you down with them at any moment (aka toilets). But now, they have those hand drying machines that blast so much air and make so much noise that I just want to scream and run out!

Well, loud noises still scare me. But that's okay...it's just a silly fear. However, there are other kinds of fears that are far more powerful and far more controlling in our lives, if we allow them to be. Silly fears are fine. (Though I'm really trying to overcome my fear of loud noises! I don't plug my ears and vacuum at the same time anymore. LOL) However, there are lots of other fears that we need to give a kick in the pants and tell, "Get lost!" Those are the fears that are keeping us from following the Lord wholeheartedly, and fears that keep us from accomplishing great things for His kingdom. And that's what I want to focus on today.

I remember a list of fears that I made when I first began my weight loss journey. I realized that I had a lot of doubts and fears about my weight loss that were floating around in my head, and I knew that I needed to identify them and rely of God's grace to overcome them. Because if I didn't do that, I knew that I'd never be successful in weight loss long term. 2 Timothy 1:7 says, "For God did not give us a spirit of fear (timidity), but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline." I knew that I couldn't be reaching for a goal, all the while doubting that I'd ever be able to achieve it. That would be like working against myself the entire time!

So, I sat down on my bed one day and wrote a list of fears that I had been entertaining. Some of my fears were just plain absurd (I was scared that I might not like how I looked after I lost weight!) but some were more gripping and "believe able" (I thought that losing weight was a hopeless cause, and one that I didn't want to fight my entire life - I was scared that I'd fail).
I sat for a while, identifying as many fears as came to mind and writing them down. Then, I went through each one and found a Scripture passage that would conquer my wrong thoughts and apply to that specific fear. After I had prayed through each one and spoken the Truth of God's Word to dispel each fear, I ripped the sheet of paper as a symbolic action and threw it in the garbage.

I wish I could say that after that day I haven't struggled with those specific fears anymore. But that's not true. I still have to fight against some of them. As long as I'm focused on Christ, I can easily dispel those fears. But when I'm focused on myself, my needs, my weaknesses...that's when my guard is down and those fears creep in again. If we want to be effective for God's Kingdom and be able to walk in His freedom, we must get past these fears and move on. Give them a kick in the pants! Find a passage of Scripture that applies to that fear, memorize it and speak it outloud. Silly fears or gripping ones......let's move on in His strength!

Unplugging my ears,
Bekah

2010-02-18T16:02:00.003-06:00

Time for another Friday favorite! I actually happened upon my favorite thing this week in the HyVee Health Mart. My mom and I were making a quick stop there to pick up some almond cheese and rice milk for my sister, Leah. Leah has struggled with acne for several years, and we found that eliminating dairy from her diet has helped immensely! It's quite amazing how much her skin has improved. It's taken several months for her to get used to the "non dairy" cheeses and milks, but now she enjoys them. And after some trial and error, she's found some yummy dairy free recipes that she likes. Her hardest thing to give up was pizza (which our family makes homemade every Friday night!). But with a little almond (or goat) cheese on top, it tastes pretty good!

Anyway, back to my story. :-) Mom and I were kind of browsing around in the refrigerated section, looking for anything else Leah might enjoy when we happened upon almond milk. That sounded VERY good to me (I love almonds!) so I grabbed a half gallon of it to take home and try. Well, it has become my new favorite thing! I put it in everything! It's very good in coffee and smoothies. Leah actually likes it (which surprised me, because it does have a strong "nutty" flavor.....but I guess that's to be expected, because it is, after all, almond milk. LOL) and she uses it on her cereal. I enjoy just drinking it plain, too! The one benefit I enjoy the most (other than it's great flavor) is the fact that it has less calories than regular milk. Only 60 calories in a cup! The downside is that it doesn't offer as much protein, but I get enough of that in other things.

My mom is asking me to stop drinking so much of it, because Leah and I have already gone through a gallon this week! So, I'm trying to cut back and show a little moderation. I'm doing pretty well....sort of....I've only used it twice today......lol.... Okay, so I have room for improvement. :-)

Give almond milk a try! But be careful - you just might like it. A LOT! (And then we'd have to start an "almond milk anonymous" group or something...)

Enjoy your weekend!

Bekah

Monday Musings...

2010-02-14T20:43:00.003-06:00

I hope that you made it through Valentine's Day without indulging in too much chocolate and baked goods! I certainly enjoyed my little bits of dark chocolate that I had last night. My dad was so thoughtful and bought a package of dark chocolates just for me! And I had to laugh as my 3 year old sister, Bethany, tried a bit of the dark chocolate and exclaimed, "Yuck! They forgot to put the sugar in it!!!". Well, all the more for me, I guess. :-)

I think it's important to keep "real life" at the forefront of our thoughts, especially when we're trying to achieve what seems like an impossible goal. For example, I was only able to exercise 3 days last week, instead of the usual 5. We had a busy schedule, and it just didn't work out. (No pun intended! LOL) Now, I could be stressing out right now. I could be racking my brain and trying to come up with ways to compensate for that unexpected turn of events. (However, I was NOT going to give up my chocolate last night - NO WAY!)

But I'm not stressing. Because that was real life. I had a busy week. It's going to happen like that sometimes, and I need to just go with the flow and compensate the best that I can without flipping out. So what did I do? I watched my calories closer and cut the unnecessary things out. And I picked back up today right where I left off last week! You've got to be able to put the past behind and keep moving onward. I can't get stuck in what I wasn't able to do - I have to be able to focus on what I need to do today. I need to live in the present, not the past or the future. Yes, I can certainly learn from the past. I can look for ways to change and improve, and maybe do things differently next time. But I can't get stuck in regret....gotta keep moving on.

On a different note, have you been watching the Winter Olympics? I have just LOVED watching the athletes compete. It is so inspiring! The amount of training and dedication it takes to compete at that level (which is the highest in the world!) is astounding. I have been motivated and challenged to perform at my best as I've watched them give their all to achieve their goals.

And that reminds me of Paul's encouragement in 1 Corinthians chapter 9. He likens our spiritual journey here on earth to a race, a race of Olympic proportions!
In 1 Corinthians 9:24-27 we read, "Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain it. Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable. So I do not run aimlessly; I do not box as one beating the air. But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified."

There are so many rich parallels and spiritual analogies that we can learn from this short passage of Scripture! So I'll just mention a few that I've been thinking about. (And then you can post other analogies that come to your mind!)

First off, verse 24 sums up what our mindset should be as Christians. We are in a race! And we are seeking the prize (which in this context, is leading people to Christ). There is no time for walking. There isn't even time for jogging. It's time to run! I was challenged to stop wasting time and "taking breaks" by doing things that I feel like doing. How foolish would it be for an athlete to show up at the Olympics and expect to win the gold by leisurely skiing down the hill or just performing a few simple turns on the ice? They would be laughed out of the competition! We must run to obtain. Yes, it's tiring. (Have I mentioned before how much I despise running?) And yes, it can be humbling if we're near the back of the pack. But our eyes should not be focused on our surroundings. Those who look back to size up their competition often get beat out, because they weren't completely focused on the goal. Our eyes need to be glued to Christ!

Secondly, I appreciate how Paul doesn't just leave this goal as a spiritual one. He also states that an athlete exercises (which means it's not always pleasant!) self-control in all things. Guess what? That includes what I eat and how I treat my body. You see, I should be glorifying Christ and making Him known to others by every means possible. And how can I preach that Christ sets captives free, if I myself am still bound by the chains of gluttony? How much of a testimony is that going to be? (OUCH!) I don't want people to look at me and instantly "disqualify" me and everything I'm saying because they see a glaring blind spot, a huge discrepancy between what I preach and how I live. That is why God (through Paul) encourages and admonishes us to discipline ourselves, in whatever area(s) where we are weak. We must keep our "self" under control!
But this doesn't happen overnight. I didn't wake up with 2% body fat the day after I decided to fight this battle with food. :-) This is not a sprint race, it's a distance race. A marathon, if you will. And the only way that we won't be disqualified by others, is if we run the race as He intended us to -completely dependent on Him. Our Lord is so full of grace and mercy that He promises to supply whatever we need. Strength for the weak, grace for when we stumble, light in the times of darkness, hope when we feel despair. He supplies all of our needs, according to His riches in glory.

So run! Don't walk. Don't give up. Run! Push through the doubts and fears. Lay aside your weights that are pulling you down. And with every step, depend on His strength.

Running with you!
Bekah

Friday Favorites...

2010-02-13T12:47:00.002-06:00

Dark chocolate. It's my favorite thing this week! If you want something sweet while celebrating Valentines' Day, buy yourself a little dark chocolate. As you may have heard, dark chocolate does have health benefits, if eaten in moderation and if you choose dark chocolate that isn't loaded with additives and preservatives. The health benefits in chocolate mainly come from the antioxidants in cocoa. Therefore, the higher the amount of cocoa in the dark chocolate, the more healthly it is! I'm currently enjoying 70% dark chocolate, and am working on training my taste buds to like the higher amounts of cocoa.

Dark chocolate has been shown to aid in improving your cardiovascular system and stabilizing blood pressure. It's also recently been shown to ease anxiety and lower stress levels. So choose some dark chocolate to satisfy your sweet tooth! It's much more healthy than milk chocolate, which adds so much milk and sugar to the cocoa that it basically cancels out all of the health benefits!

It only been in the past few years that I've begun to love dark chocolate. I used to think it was bitter and disgusting! But as I've been cutting most sugar out of my diet, I've begun to find "natural" sugar and items that have lower levels of sugar to be quite sweet. So, give it a try! You just might like it.

Happy Valentine's Day everyone!

Bekah

"Behold, what manner of love the Father hath bestowed upon us, that we should be called the sons of God...." 1 John 3:1

"Beloved, let us love one another: for love is of God; and everyone that loveth is born of God, and knoweth God." 1 John 4:7

Monday Musings...

2010-02-08T13:01:00.003-06:00

Is it possible to know if a rice cake has grown stale? I'm serious! I was pondering that this morning as I opened a new package and was trying to decide how best to store the remaining rice cakes. Do I even need to store them? My family thinks they taste like styrofoam already (I disagree!), but I stood in our pantry for a few moments as I tried to imagine what a stale rice cake would taste like. I'm not really sure. But now I'm kind of curious to leave one sitting on the counter for a few days and see.....:-)

Anyway, happy Monday, everyone! I hope you had a fabulous weekend. I am SO glad that I've begun recording my calories again. Like I've mentioned, weekends are tough for me. I just feel like I deserve to have whatever I want to eat and however much of it I want, because I've worked so hard throughout the week, ya know. But acting on that kind of thinking has been getting me in trouble these past few months, and I'm out to break that cycle. So this weekend, even though I went a little over my normal calorie limit, I kept track and didn't do near the amount of damage! Instead of eating a whole bowl of tortilla chips and salsa while watching the Super Bowl, (which is what I wanted) I counted out 2 servings of mini rice cakes instead. And I realized while eating them, that I wasn't really hungry. I just wanted to eat because everyone else in my family was. Can anyone relate to that? :-)

Oh, the peer pressure of eating is strong! And it works both ways. When we girls go out to lunch or have a snack with our girlfriends, we all eat like birds because we don't want anyone to think that we're (dare I even say it?) PIGS!!!!! We all sit there, thinking the same thing, "Boy, I really want to eat more.", but rarely anyone dares to go for a 2nd helping. However, once one brave soul does, we are all too eager to jump in and follow suit! What was once considered being a pig is now an act of kindness, because we wouldn't want that brave soul to feel uncomfortable by eating alone while everyone else watches and drools. (My apologies is that is too descriptive! I just find the whole situation rather commical. And if you ever have the chance to eat with me, you can rest assured that by God's grace - He's turning me into a brave soul! LOL

It boils down to this - we need to focus our eyes on Jesus and walk in the Spirit and stop caring so much about what other people think. Sometimes, it's okay to eat a second helping. But sometimes, we need to just stop eating because we're already satisfied. This is something that can't be determined by social manners. I can't tell you how many times I've needed to graciously refuse food that has been offered to me, whether it's a cookie from Grandma or a piece of cake at a party. I'm used to it now! But it takes courage to do that. It takes practice. And it takes dying to your reputation and seeking to glorify the Lord through your motives and actions.

Well, how was that for a set of completely unrelated topics? I hope you're Monday musings are a little more organized than mine!

Friday Favorites...

2010-02-05T08:59:00.007-06:00

Have you ever walked into a store and noticed a really cute blouse being "modeled" by a stylish mannequin that you thought would look great on you, too? But then you go into the dressing room and try it on, only to find that (though you hate to admit it!) it looks better on the dumb mannequin than on you. So, you walk back out of the dressing room and browse through the sea of clothes, trying to find some other piece of clothing that meets all of your criteria before you head back to the dressing room to try again.

It can be somewhat discouraging, if you try on several different outfits and still can't seem to find something that you like. Most of the time, my problem is that it just doesn't fit right. Maybe the blouse looks perfect.....except for the arm holes, because they're too big and droopy. Or maybe the skirt looks nice........but the waist doesn't sit right on your hips. The pants you try on would look great.....if they didn't make your thighs look like tree trunks. You might find a cute pair of shoes, but when you put them on, you can't help but think that they make your feet look huge.

I have had those scenarios take place MANY times. Shopping would be fun if I happened to find something that I was looking for, or a complete waste of time if everything I tried on just didn't look right. It was rather confusing and overwhelming to search through all the racks of clothing, as I attempted to find just the right piece of clothing. I mean, I thought, "If it can look so nice on a silly mannequin - why couldn't I get it to look nice on me?"

It wasn't until a few short years ago that I learned a few tips about how to shop smartly. And though most of you might already know these simple tips, they have really transformed the way I shop for clothing, which is why "knowing and dressing for your body shape" is my favorite thing this week!

First, you might wonder why it's so important to dress according to your body shape. Good question! Here are a few benefits and blessings of doing so :

1. People will be drawn to look at your countenance - not your body
2. People who dress appropriately gain respect from others and it gives "weight" (lol) to your words
3. You will feel comfortable in what you're wearing, and therefore are able to focus on giving to others instead of worrying and fidgeting with your clothes
4. You'll look great!

Now that you've seen a few of the benefits, let's get started! It all begins with a simple evaluation of your body. I'm sure that most of you have heard the common categories of body shapes for women - apple shaped, pear shaped, straight/rectangle shaped, and hourglass shaped. If you aren't sure which shape you are, here are a few characteristics of each kind:

apple shaped = "top heavy", bust 3 or more inches inches bigger than your hips, a fuller face and neck, broader shoulders, more narrow hips with a fuller, undefined waist

pear shaped =bottom heavy, hips significantly larger than bust, a long or slender neck, sloping or narrow shoulders, curvy hips and backside, full thighs and calves, defined, slim waist

straight/rectangular shaped (or the toothpick!) = bust, waist, and hips are basically the same size, a full neck, broad back, undefined waist, a balanced figure

hourglass shape = equal hip and bust measurements with a narrow waist, symmetrical shoulders and hips, shapely legs

Have you figured out which one you are? In my case, I didn't need much time for deliberation....I'm most definitely a pear. :-) Once I realized what shape my body resembled, it helped me to decide which types and styles of clothes would look best on me. And this is not just about dressing to appear more sleek and slim. (I mean, seriously - have you ever looked at a bowl of fruit and thought that the pear looked sleek and slim? It ain't gonna happen, sista'!) But like I mentioned above, dressing appropriately for your body shape will draw attention to your countenance (which is what we want!) because people aren't distracted by your clothes. We all know people who try to squeeze into clothing that is much too tight, thinking that it will make them appear thin. In fact, it does the opposite! The clothes may cover them, but by showing every curve and hump, it's not modest at all. And I'm sure you also know other people who wear very baggy clothes that kind of hang on them and resemble a potato sack. That's not very attractive, either! :-) Without some shape to the clothes, it makes them appear sloppy and larger than they actually are.

So, how do you know what type of clothes to wear for your shape? You can find helpful information in books, which I have done, and also on different websites. In order not to make this post too long, I'm going to attempt to give just a few simple guidelines that the "fashion experts" suggest for each body type. It's important to remember, however, that you are unique! There are guidelines that you can follow, but if something doesn't work for you - move on to something else. Don't try to completely fit into the mold, and don't go to your closet and throw out anything that doesn't line up with these guidelines! Evaluate your clothes by how they look on you - not on a mannequin, even if the mannequin is your body shape. :-)

Okay, let's begin with our apple shaped friends. Your main goal is to lengthen and elongate your torso, which will give the appearance of slimmer shoulders and waist. Wrap around tops look best on you, as do fitted tops - as long as they're not too tight. V-necks look great, too! Look for blouses that have a cinched waist or a belted jacket. This will help to balance your shape!
Skirts should be fitted at the waist and flare at the hem line. Because the lower half of your body is significantly smaller than your top, and A-line skirt will help balance things out. You'll want to look for jeans that have a flat front, and those that have flared or bootcut legs, which will give you a long, balanced look.

And now, onto those of us who are pear shaped. Blouses that are fitted and have lots of detailing and texture will help draw attention away from your backside and to your face. Look for blouses that are scooped, draped, v'd, rounded, or squared. Anything that makes your shoulders appear more broad. A-lined and flared skirts look best on pears. When choosing a dress, choose one with an empire waist or a wrap dress which will flow over your hips. Keep prints on top and dark, solid colors on the bottom. Find jeans that are flared and have a straight leg, which will balance out the larger thighs.

For my straight/rectangle shaped friends, your unique challenge is to find tops that will help give you curves! Cinched tops and belted tops that give you a waist look great! Jackets that flare out from your waist will give you "instant hips". Again, skits that are A-line, pencil, or flared will help you find your feminine curves! You'll look nice in jeans that have a straight leg from the hip to the knee and have a slight flare at the end.

And finally, the most coveted group of women, my hourglass shaped friends! Look for tops with V-necks or scooped necks, and find jackets that will sit right at your waist. Wrap around tops are also great for emphasizing your waist. Pencil skirts look great on you, as do A-line skirts. Find skirts that are longer, as this will make your appearance more balanced.

Whew! This is taking a long time to type up. I'm going to have to save my other thoughts for another time. But I'd like to hear yours! What shape are you and what kind of clothes do you like to wear? Have you ever thought about shopping for your shape, or is this a new concept to you? Any other thoughts about the topic?

Let me hear from you! ~Bekah

Monday Musings...

2010-02-01T13:25:00.003-06:00

A challenge. I've decided to do something different this month. I realized that I've been much too apathetic about my weight loss recently. I mean, I can't complain that I can't seem to get the weight to keep coming off (and stop creeping back up as it's been doing in the last few weeks) if I'm not totally committed and doing everything I can to lose the weight. I have a tendency to hold it together during the week days (eating healthy, exercising, etc.) and then "reward" myself for all of the work I'd done that week by eating more calories than usual during the weekend. It's turned into a vicious cycle, as you can imagine. And now I'm ready to break the cycle!

What I'm doing is rather simple. I've given myself a challenge to meet this month, and I purposely made it difficult and "impossible" to achieve so that I'm not tempted to slack off at all. (Knowing yourself and your tendencies to be weak in certain areas is an important aspect of weight loss!) Anyway, I've set a goal to lose 10 pounds this month. Yep, 10 pounds. Right now, it does seem impossible, especially given my slow progress these past few months. But I'm up for the challenge! And I know that it's going to keep me focused this month. I needed a goal and something to work toward. I'd gotten sluggish, and this goal is so huge that I'm going to need to focus every day, not just on the week days.

So now that you know my plans for the month, here's my challenge for you - make a huge goal for yourself! About anything....spending X amount of time in the Word....witnessing to X amount of people each week......avoiding X unhealthy foods.......keeping in touch with X friends and encouraging them.....finishing X projects that you've begun......whatever! And make it seem hard, even unrealistic. Strive for the "unachievable"! Ask the Lord to help you dream big. Because even if you do fall short, you've still made more progress than you would have otherwise. That's my hope for this month! You've all heard the saying, "Shoot for the moon and you'll at least fall into the stars". (Or something like that!)

I pray that this month we'll break out of our normal cycles. That we'll embrace Christ and walk in His freedom like never before! This has to be about more than just losing weight. Because in the light of eternity, that gains me nothing. I will be challenged to press into Christ and abide in Him this month, to put aside desires of my flesh, and to walk according to the Spirit. It's going to be a month of spiritual growth and (hopefully) physical shrinking. :-)

Yes, I have a hard month ahead. I'm going to need to persevere when I would have normally given up, and give things up that I would have normally have indulged in. So I'm trusting that "the joy of the Lord is my strength" that "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" and that "I am more than a conqueror through Him who loved me".

Like I mentioned in my last post, encouragement from others is a huge key to success, especially when you make outrageous goals. So if you feel the Lord leading you to make a goal, post a comment and share it! I'd love to hold you up in prayer and be there to encourage you.

Up for the challenge! ~Bekah

Friday Favorites...

2010-01-30T11:54:00.003-06:00

Yes, I know. It's Saturday. I was out of the house the whole day yesterday, and last night my family was able to pull off a surprise birthday party for my sister, Leah! She turned 16 on Wednesday, and we had a lot of fun planning this secret event. So, even though it's not Friday anymore, we'll just have to pretend that it is. :-) I considered blogging around midnight as the last of our guests left, but then realized that this post would still show up on Saturday (early morning as it was). My desire for sleep won, and though I had not posted yet, I went to bed. :-) My apologies if you were waiting all day for me to post! (Though I doubt that happened....lol)

Okay, my favorite for this week is actually.......all of you! I was thinking this week of how blessed I am to have you to encourage me and spur me on to reach my goals, spiritually, emotionally, and physically. As women, we need our girlfriends! We need people to come along side us and be vessels through which the Lord can pour out His love. People who will speak the truth in love to us, when it's something that we'll find pleasant to hear and even when it's not. The Lord created us to need relationships with others! And most importantly, He created us with the need (and amazing privilege) to have a strong relationship with Him.

Having a strong relationship with the Lord and also have strong relationships with Godly friends are two of the most important keys to my success, in every area of life. As I seek to learn the lessons of living by the Holy Spirit's power and walking in His Spirit, I will begin to experience the freedom for which Christ shed his precious blood. 2 Corinthians 3:17 says, "Now the Lord is that Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty (freedom)." And I'm thankful for friends who encourage me in my walk with Christ and are seeking to walk in the Spirit, as well!

Godly friendship is a treasure. I have heard so many other young ladies tell me, "Oh, how I wish that I had more like-minded girls in my area! It seems that I'm the only girl who is seeking to please the Lord in every area of my life." And it's true - there is a battle raging for the hearts and minds of young ladies! The devil would like nothing more than to get our focus off of Christ, and he'll use whatever tactics he can to cause us to stumble and fall. For me, he might seek to make me so focused on changing my outward appearance, that I neglect to remember my inward beauty is what the Lord desires the most. I don't want to invest more in my outward appearance than my inward!

And that's where you come in. We all need encouragement. We need people to hold us accountable. We need prayer. We need to have long talks. In a word, we need our girlfriends! And I thank you for being that for me. I love my girlfriends! Your support and prayer means more than you could ever know. Yes, Godly friends are definitely one of my favorite things.....

"A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity." Proverbs 17:17

"Faithful are the wounds of a friend..." Proverbs 27:6a

"and the Scripture was fullfilled that said, "Abraham believed God, and it was credited to Him as righteousness"-and he was called a friend of God". James 2:23

Monday Musings...

2010-01-25T16:44:00.004-06:00

Sometimes, we need a little extra motivation to do something that we don't really want to do. Have you ever felt that way? I did this past week, so I did something about it. And I found that a splash of color was all I needed.

You see, I'd fallen off the wagon and needed to jump back on. The "calorie counting" wagon, that is. I've gotten out of the habit of writing down what I eat, which many "fitness gurus" say is the first key to weight loss success. I was faithful to write things down for months on end by just grabbing the little notebook I kept on top of our refrigerator and jotting down my meals. But, like I mentioned, I've gotten out of the habit of doing that, and I'm motivated to do it again. It really is a helpful tool, and it's just pure laziness that I don't feel like doing it anymore. So, after giving my laziness a good kick in the pants, I resolved to begin recording again....last week...and I've yet to write anything down.

It's not that I didn't want to record, it's just that I couldn't. I didn't have an empty notebook. And my attempts to write things down on a piece of paper wasn't working, as my papers kept getting thrown in the garbage by my uninformed family members. :-)

So today, as I was shopping in Michaels, I noticed a bright, colorful notebook and thought, "Hey - this is perfect!" I love colors, and being the very visionary person that I am, I picked out the brightest, wildest pattern I could find. I'm sure I looked ridiculous as I dug through their bargain bin, pulling out the most outrageous patterns and judging them by their "motivation factor". I settled on a pattern that is has a dark teal pattern with white/purple/lime green/light blue/pink flowers all over it. It's cheerful, colorful, and most of all -motivating. I can't wait to write in it! (Even if I'm only counting calories....)

The moral of this musing is.....find something that will motivate you to reach your goals! Even if all you need is a silly little notebook.

Love, Bekah

Friday Favorites

2010-01-22T09:53:00.006-06:00

Friday is here, which means it's time for me to post another one of my favorite things! It almost makes me want to burst into song, singing "These Are a Few of My Favorite Things!" which was originally (and masterfully) sung by the one and only Julie Andrews. But I'll spare you that, because #1 - no one can sing it like Julie! and #2 - this post isn't about favorite musicals. :-)

So, I won't be posting about raindrops on roses or whiskers on kittens. (Or bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens....lol) My favorite thing this week is simple exercises. Now I don't mean "easy" exercises, but simple ones. You know, the kind that everyone can do, anywhere they want. Simple exercises are great! You don't have to be in a gym, you don't have to hire your own personal trainer. They are s-i-m-p-l-e. All you need is a book or DVD to show you proper form (which is crucial!) and you're on your way to stronger muscles!

Some of my favorite simple exercises are lunges, squats, leg lifts, (which are really good for working your thighs, ladies!) bicep curls, hammer curls, rows, or anything using your arms and weights, crunches, situps, etc. The list could go on! I love the simplicity of exercise. I think sometimes we use the excuse of "Oh, I could never do that! It's looks too difficult." to keep us from exercising, when, in fact, we can do the exercises - we just don't want to. :-) There is no shame in starting as a "beginner" and working your way up! That's the way I did it. I remember when I could only do 10 jumping jacks at a time! Do lunges look too difficult? Then don't bend your knees and go so far down into the movement...Think push-ups are too hard? Then start by doing them on your knees...The point is - do them! Even if you have to make the movements a little easier as you begin.

And the beauty of this, is that you can perform these exercises anywhere! I've been known to do lunges in the kitchen while waiting for water to boil on the stove. I have a friend who told me that she does squats while brushing her teeth each night! Do you have little brothers and sisters? They love to be picked up and played with. I've actually performed tricep extensions by raising our 17 month old foster baby up above my head! (And no, I haven't ever dropped her....:-))

Again, simple doesn't mean easy. It just means that the playing field is level - you can do them! You just have to make the choice to do it.

And if you have ideas of creative ways to incorperate simple exercises into your day, please comment! I'd love to get some more ideas.

Blessings,
Bekah

Monday Musings

2010-01-18T07:46:00.003-06:00

Mirror, Mirror, on the wall. Who's the fairest one of all?

Today, I've been thinking about the power of mirrors. I know, I know. It's a rather strange thing to be contemplating, but I warned you that these posts would be random!

The power of mirrors. For us, as young ladies, mirrors hold a lot of power. We don't like to admit it, but c'mon ladies....you know it's true! We wake up in the morning and are aghast to see our "morning faces", so we wash and scrub, cleanse and moisturize - and that's just to clean up! If we want to go out in public, we spend more time in front of the unmerciful mirror and "enhance our features" with makeup. Have you ever been like me and thought, "Ugh! Why doesn't my eyeshadow look right?....Eeewww! This mascara is clumping!....Whoa...too much blush. Great, I get to look like I'm in a continual state of embarrassment all day.......Hmmm...does my foundation make me look pale?.....And how dark should my eyeliner be?....Lipstick or gloss? This is taking forever......

Then, it's on to fixing our "bed head". Brushes, combs, curling irons, straightening tools, spritz and spray to hold it in place. (That is, unless we're having the dreaded "bad hair day". In that case, some of us would rather just stay home than go out looking like that!) We try something new, hoping to break out of our old hair do rut. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. When you're not in a hurry and don't really care, it will work. When you are frantically rushing about in order to be ready on time, it won't. (At least, that's what happens with me!)

And that's just the top of our bodies. Then it's on to dressing. How often do we ask ourselves this question, "What should I wear?". It's not a wrong question to ask. In fact, dressing appropriately is very important! But if we were completely honest, that's not our true question. That's not what we mean. When we ask, "What should I wear?", we could attach all kinds of endings. Some stem from pure motives, others from...dare I say it?.....pride.

A list of pure motive questions would be:
-What should I wear that is modest, and will be modest in all weather conditions and standing/sitting positions?
-What should I wear that is honoring to my parents, especially my father?
-What should I wear that is a good fit for my body type? ('Cause we've all seen people wearing clothes that were NOT meant for their body shape, and no matter how much flesh it covers - it's not modest.)
-What should I wear that would encourage people to look at my countenance?
-What should I wear that would encourage other girls to dress modestly?

We could add more, but you get the point. Those should be the questions we ask, and I think for most of us, they are. However, I've noticed that too often we mix in a few other questions. Questions that stem from our feelings of pride, insecurity, peer-pressure, rejection, and fear. Questions like:
-What should I wear that will draw attention to me?
-What should I wear that will help me to fit in with everyone else?
-What should I wear that will enhance the features I'm proud of and cover the ones that make me discontent and jealous of others?
-What should I wear that will gain approval and praise from others?
-What should I wear that won't make me look fat?
-What should I wear that will make me look super cute and stylish?

Again, the list could go on. And with all of these questions whirling in our minds, we stand in front of the mirror and critique outfit number one. Then two. Then three. Then four. As the mirror has no mercy on our "trouble spots", so we don't have mercy on ourselves. And the seeds of discontentment continue to grow.

I wish I had a body like (insert name). Why do my hips look so big? This outfit isn't very stylish. My feet look huge, and these shoes aren't very cute but they were all I could find in my size. I think this shirt makes my arms look weird.

I wonder what our mirrors would say if they really could talk? Would they speak like the mirror in "Snow White", praising our beauty one day, and alerting us to anyone who had beauty that surpassed our own the next? I suspect they would tell us to stop obsessing over the reflection we see. I haven't done any calculations, but I would assume that over the course of our lives we spend thousands of hours checking and rechecking our appearance. Makeup still look fresh? Hair still holding it's style? Clothes portraying the message I want to send?

Which begs the question, "Is that wrong?". Is it wrong to be concerned about our appearance? Is it wrong to want to dress fashionably? Is it wrong to spend so much time in front of the mirror?

Where is the balance?

*To be continued....* After I hear some of your thoughts on the subject!

Friday Favorites

2010-01-15T10:26:00.003-06:00

As my first "Friday Favorites" post, I pondered over what to write. Should I pick a favorite food from this past week? (Like Nutella, which I tried for this first time - definitely a new favorite! I mean, anything with chocolate and nuts mixed together is an automatic favorite for me.)
Or, maybe I should pick one of my favorite exercises to highlight. Yes, I do have favorite exercises - it is possible to like some aspects of exercise! In fact, I really enjoy strength training.

But, I decided to highlight a new favorite drink for me - a Green Tea Smoothie. It's super simple to make and a very light, refreshing drink. Now, I actually don't care for tea. Never have, though I've tried to make myself like it for years. :-) But I love this smoothie! And it's prpbably because you can't taste the tea very much. So for those of you who are tea drinkers, you might want to add more tea to the smoothie than the recipe calls for, especially if you're wanting a strong "tea flavor".
Tea has so many healthy benefits, and I'm sad to missing out on them. I've tried all kinds of tea, but the flavor itself just makes me gag. Even if I plug my nose while drinking! I'm a hopeless cause...an outsider looking in. I shall never be able to enjoy a winter evening sitting in front of a crackling fire, wrapped up in a soft blanket and sipping hot tea out of a beautiful China tea cup. *SOB!!!!!!* How depressing is that???? But at least I get a little green tea in the smoothie!

I originally got this recipe from a book that came along with the Mr. Coffee Frappe Maker that I bought for my sisters for Christmas. But, don't worry - you don't have to own a frappe maker in order to enjoy this smoothie. Just throw the ingredients into a good blender and you can make your own!

Add 1/2 cup of prepared green tea in a blender with about 1 cup of ice, (more or less, depending on how thick you want your smoothie - I usually do a little less because I prefer it not so icy cold!), 1 tbsp of honey and 1/2 tbsp of sugar (I use our unrefined sugar, or you could substitute with a few drops of stevia), 1/2 cup of milk, and 1/2 tsp of vanilla extract. Blend it all together and enjoy!

I drank several of these when I had a horrible head cold about a week ago and was impressed with how much they helped my cold clear up. I added a drop of peppermint oil into the smoothie and it helped "unplug" my nose and open my airways. A word of advice about peppermint oil - if you add too much, you'll feel the burn on your tongue and down your throat! Don't overdue it. I learned that the hard way...:-)

Blessings on your Friday! ~Bekah

A Word for your Wednesday...

2010-01-13T11:53:00.002-06:00

For by you I can run against a troop, and by my God I can leap over a wall.

This God - his way is perfect, the word of the Lord proves true; he is a shield for all who take refuge in him.

Psalm 18:29-30

Monday Musings

2010-01-11T15:39:00.004-06:00

Happy New Year! I have great and lofty goals for this blog as this new year rolls around. And I must be honest, it's going to take a lot of diligence and creativity on my part. I haven't exactly been too diligent in posting regularly, and that in part is due to a crazy schedule, but also due to my pride. Now, you may be wondering what my pride has to do with keeping me from posting, but it's quite simple. I'm still not where I want to be! I still haven't achieved my weight loss goal! And it's hard to get excited about posting when I feel like I'm not making a lot of progress.

But, my pride is about to suffer a severe blow. I have plans! Plans for it's demise. Plans to be honest - to post the truth. And to post it diligently and regularly. Be prepared! This blog is about to get turned upside down.

Here are my new goals. First off, I will begin posting Monday Musings. This will be about everything and anything! Whatever I may be musing about on that day. Whether it be a Scripture passage, how to cut calories in a favorite dish, or what style of clothing best suits my body type, you're going to get to tap into what is this girl is thinking about. (Don't be scared! I don't have time to post all of my thoughts...)

My next goal is that Fridays will be "Friday Favorites". On this day, I'll share a favorite of mine. A favorite food, exercise, Scripture verse, etc. I look forward to sharing that with you!

Finally, my goal is to reach even more young ladies with the truth of God's Word and the freedom that is found in Him! And with this goal, I'll need your help. Please pass this blog along to whoever you think would be encouraged by it. I don't want this blog to just be a hobby, but a ministry - a ministry to the daughters of the King!

And now, though this may seem a bit presumptuous, I have made a goal for you, my dear committed readers. It's a simple goal, but one that is a way that you can be an encouragement to me. Post a comment! That's it. I'm easily encouraged. :-)

Blessings to you all in this coming year! And may the Lord be glorified.

Bekah

Pizza!

2009-11-29T16:47:00.003-06:00

homemade pizza...yum!

I'll start of this post with these pictures of the pizza I made last night. When I first began my quest to clean up my diet and eat more healthy foods, I had a very difficult time giving up our family pizza nights each week. It's a tradition, and it was hard to sit and eat a salad (even though I love salads!) while the rest of the family was eating pizza. I decided that if I had to give it up, I would. But I went on a search for a healthy pizza recipe and was delighted when I found one!

For awhile, I tried to eat the "more healthy" pizzas that you can find at the grocery store. They were a little better than your regular pizza! But even though they used whole ingredients, it was still processed food. The pizzas still had a lot of fat and preservatives, and after eating it I felt like I'd just eaten the same regular pizza that my family did. The only plus to getting a "healthy" frozen pizza from the store was the fact that I'd buy the individual pizzas, so my portion size was manageable. That wasn't enough of a plus to keep me on that path, however, so I searched for a good homemade wheat crust to use.

After finding a good recipe for a simple whole wheat pizza crust (thank you, Google!), I just loaded it up with as many veggies as I had on hand (peppers, onions, mushrooms, broccoli, etc) and topped it with mozzarella cheese. It's delicious! And when you pull it out of the oven, it doesn't have pools of grease sitting on top. (That would always gross me out!) As I've found over and over again, homemade food really is the best!

There are hundreds of recipes for pizza dough online, and to be honest, I just clicked on the first one I found. When I was looking, I was in a time crunch and couldn't wait 30 minutes or more for the dough to rise, which is why this recipe doesn't call for that. All it takes is:

1 pkg, dry yeast
1 C warm water
1 tsp salt
2 tbsp oil
2 1/2 C flour

Dissolve yeast in warm water. Stir in remaining ingredients. Let stand 5 minutes. Spread in buttered pans. Put on toppings. Bake at 400 degrees for 10-12 minutes.

Easy! If anyone else makes their pizzas and has a yummy recipe to share, please do so. Our family has switched over from buying frozen pizzas to making our own in the past few months, and it's working great. It saves us a lot of money (because we eat pizza every Friday!) and we're able to personalize them by putting on the toppings that we all like. And seeing everyone in our family likes something different, it has alleviated a lot of stress because we can make exactly what we want. :-)

Wow! I wasn't planning on taking up a whole post by talking about pizza. My next post will be much more spiritual, as I'm excited to share a search on beauty that the Lord is showing me in His Word. Keep checking back! I promise that it won't be a month before you hear from me again. :-)

Till then ~ Bekah

All Consuming...

2009-11-03T11:11:00.008-06:00

In the past few weeks, I've been pondering the last two verses in Hebrews chapter 12 that read, "Therefore, let us be grateful for receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, and thus let us offer to God acceptable worship, with reverence and awe, for our God is a consuming fire". My thoughts drifted to that passage of Scripture, because the Lord has been challenging me (again!) to make Him the consuming passion of my life. I find it all to easy to go through the motions of living my normal life day to day with very little thought of Him, who He is and what He has done for me. That's not to say that I don't ever think of Him (because I do) but not in a consuming way. Actually, I spend a larger portion of time pondering what to eat during the day and how many calories I'm eating, what exercises I should do in my workouts, and how to burn more calories throughout the day.

Now, I don't think that it's necessarily wrong to think about those things. The Lord makes it very clear in Scripture that our bodies belong to Him (1 Cor. 6) and He wants me to take good care of them by eating healthy and being in good physical shape. But when you are trying to lose weight, it is all too easy to take "caring for my body" to an extreme. Especially when you get frustrated by not achieving the results that you want and have been told to expect.

So, I'm stuck in a position where I'm trying to reach a balance, a happy medium. I don't want to be like a pendulum, swinging back and forth between obsession and carelessness. Neither of those are pleasing to the Lord. And neither of them are a life that I want to live. I don't want to just "give up" and work on maintaining when I feel like I can (and should) lose more, but I also don't want to obsess and look for happiness in a number. My emotions should be controlled by the Spirit, not by what my eyes see. And that's true in every area of life!

So, what to do? How do I find this happy medium? How do I know when to push harder and when to back off? How will I ever find out the right amount of food to eat, the best way for me to exercise, and the motivation to keep pressing on when I seem to be spinning my wheels and getting nowhere?

You know, I love how simple God makes the answers to our problems. (And yet there are also times when I wish He would make it more complicated, because then I could get by with the excuse that His solutions are too hard!) But there are no excuses. Even this blonde can read His Word and understand exactly what He wants me to do.

First off, I need to stop comparing my body to others. It's that simple - just stop comparing! Stop feeding discontentment. I am a unique creation, and He has made me for one purpose, which is to glorify Him. And that has nothing to do with what size I wear or how long I can run! In order for Him to work through me, I need to get over this obsession with how I look, especially compared to others. I am blessed by remembering, "Charm is deceptive and beauty is vain. But a women who fear God is to be praised." Proverbs 31:30 There is such freedom when you care only how He views you! No other opinion matters...sounds too good to be true.

Secondly, I need to eat simply to fuel my body and not to "satisfy" any emotion or desire I might be experiencing. He is the Bread of Life. He is the Living Water. (John 6) He alone can satisfy any desire I have, and I need to turn to Him instead of food.

Thirdly, I need to do the work to be in good shape. I can't give up when things get hard or slack off because I don't feel like doing it. I want to be ready and able to serve Him in whatever He calls me to do. Being in good shape is not just about being a certain size or weight. It aids in keeping my body strong to fight against sickness or disease, which means I'll be around longer to serve Him! It boosts my emotions and gives me energy. Exercising has too many benefits to skip out on it!

Sounds easy enough to do, right? I mean, it's simple to understand. I like this quote, "The concept is grasped, but the execution is a little elusive." How true! I often grasp the truths of the Word but seem to fail in executing them in day to day life. I have a lot of head knowledge, and my constant prayer is that those truths would become heart knowledge. I don't want to miss what God is trying to teach me because I'm so focused on achieving an outward figure that will fade away someday. I'm searching Scripture to find the balance. And I know that He will make everything clear as I continue digging in!

Seeking to find ~ Bekah

Birthday Bash

2009-10-19T20:22:00.005-05:00

These pictures are from my birthday last Thursday. It was a fun, exciting day! Dad bought me some beautiful flowers (as is the tradition in our family), Mom tried to burn down the house while making my birthday dinner (don't drape a towel over the dinner rolls rising on the back of the stove while the front burner is turned on!), Avalon made me a unique strawberry cake and she and Bethany helped me blow all 21 candles out, and I enjoyed eating the dark chocolate Mom bought me - instead of Avalon's cake (which didn't appeal to me at all anyway - I'm not a cake person.) It was a special day!

I haven't posted in almost a month. Partially because I haven't had time, and partially because I haven't had a lot of news to report. I'm still floating around in the low 180's. I've begun cutting some carb calories and replacing with protein calories in the past few days, which is hard for me to do! I wish it was the other way around. But I realized that I had been overloading in the carb catagory...my comfort food! So even though it hasn't been the easiest thing to cut, I'm doing okay.

And I'm a little frustrated right now, because the "magic key" that turns on our treadmill has disappeared in the past week. I've looked everywhere that I can think of, but it hasn't turned up yet. Because of that, I've been doing my DVD's more (which I actually prefer anyway) and spending more time doing weight training. Eesh! My poor muscles can tell. I had an interesting experience last week when I bought a t-shirt from Walmart. I brought it home, tried it on and discovered that the arm holes were a lot smaller than I thought they would be. In fact, my arm barely squeezed through them! Every other area fit perfectly. Hmmm....the only thing I can come up with is that my arm muscles are getting bigger and don't fit quite so well. I certainly haven't gained fat in my arms, so it has to be muscle! At least, that's what I'm choosing to believe. :-)

So, I'm cutting overall calories and specific carb calories and hoping for a better number this coming Friday. And I'm praying that we find the little key for the treadmill!

Blessings!

Bekah

Salad Dressing? Apple Bread?

2009-09-28T20:19:00.004-05:00

Okay, everyone! I need your help. It's time for some "blog reader participation"! I'm wanting to find a yummy salad dressing recipe, and I haven't stumbled on a good one yet. The few that I've tried just don't taste right; the ingredients don't seem to blend together very well. So, do you have any great recipes to share with me? I really want to go "all natural" instead of buying the processed stuff from the store. Is there any way to make a homemade ranch dressing? Or honey mustard? Or am I limited to a balsamic vinaigrette? If you've got an answer, please post it!

Also, we just spent a fabulous day at an apple orchard and now I'm really wanting to make some apple bread. Does anyone have a yummy apple bread recipe?

Thanks all!

~Bekah

Hormones and tennis...

2009-09-22T21:18:00.004-05:00

What? It's been almost a month since I last wrote on here? Unbelievable. How do I even begin to catch up? Guess I'll do my best.

First of all, thanks for your prayers for Penny. I've had several other conversations with her since that day at the gym and the more I hear of her story, the more I've been praying for her and Becky! My mom did meet with them at the library to discuss their options for schooling, and right now they haven't decided to change anything. But I'm praying for their salvation most importantly. Homeschooling isn't the answer. Jesus is the answer! One of the main things that the Lord has taught me through this experience is that I need to continually be focusing on Christ in everything. My plan was to go to the gym and have an intense workout. His plan was for me to minister His love to a stranger. And that's happened several times now! I need to be prepared for those moments when my plan gets shoved out of the way so that I can walk in what He wants me to be doing. I mean, in the light of eternity - does it really matter if I got a good workout that day? Not really. Even if it comes back to bite me on the scale, so be it. What's more important is that I'm walking in the Spirit in every area of my life. Yes, especially in regard to my plans. "My ways are not your ways, and my thoughts are not your thoughts." So true! I don't want to miss an opportunity that the Lord drops into my lap just because I'm so focused on myself and what I want to do. (Or don't want to do, in the case of exercising. lol)

And then, on to my weight. I was super excited when I saw that I'd lost 2 pounds a few weeks ago! And then rather disappointed when I repeated the same thing the next week only to find that I gained them back. This past week, I had a little success when I lost one of the pounds that I'd gained. Yikes! It's such a roller-coaster. Sometimes makes me just want to scream! Anybody know a personal trainer who doesn't charge for training? :-) lol

Actually, I'm beginning to read a book about having balanced hormones right now. (No, I'm not going through menopause!!) The whole premise of the book is that if your hormones are balanced, it will be much easier to drop excess weight and maintain a healthy weight. The thing that caught my attention about this book was that lots of people wrote reviews and said that they seemed to have the "stuck scale syndrome" - where it didn't seem to matter how little they ate or how much they exercised, the scale didn't budge very much. (Sound familiar?) And after following the advice of this book, the were able to drop the weight. So, I'm intrigued. Haven't read very far yet, but it seems that it will have some good information. Honestly, I just love reading books and gaining knowledge about how God designed out bodies to work. Even if it is a secular author writing, the information I read makes me praise God for His creativity!

Soooo, that's about it right now. Except that I've had a strong desire to learn how to play tennis recently. It just looks fun! But I think it's past the prime season for tennis playing. Maybe next year...:-)

Have you noticed how beautiful the weather is this afternoon? Go take a walk! You'll love it. Happy Fall!

Love,
Bekah

A Different Day In the Gym...

2009-09-01T13:13:00.003-05:00

I was on the treadmill, walking at about 3 mph to warm up before I got started on my run. There were two other ladies in the gym with me this morning, and they were chatting away about the weather while riding the stationary bikes. I was trying to focus on the task ahead (namely, running) and doing my best to ignore the TV on the wall in front of me that was blasting "Live with Regis and Kelly". (I don't even know why they turned the TV on, because they never once looked up to watch it!)

After they had spent a few minutes talking, one of the ladies (Penny) turned to me and asked, "So, how are you doing today, dear?". I replied that I was doing well, then asked about her. She said she was doing okay, and I kind of assumed the conversation would end there. I was about to hit the button to speed up the treadmill when Penny asked me, "Hey, do you have a job?". Ugh, I hate that question. Mostly because when I tell people "no" and then also answer their next question ("So are you in college?") with a "no", they usually give me a funny look and write me off as some unproductive member of society. :-)

So, this morning I explained to Penny that I didn't have a traditional job, but that I was going to be teaching a class for home schooled girls. She was very intrigued by that and then asked me a loaded question. Penny said, "Home schooling? Yes, I've heard of that. How exactly does that work?". Okay, I can forget about running for awhile, I thought to myself. I attempted to give her a brief answer about home schooling and how it works, but I quickly figured out that Penny was so interested because she's been having a lot of trouble with her 15 year old daughter (Becky) and she needs help. She explained to me that Becky is very smart, but that she doesn't like all of the rules and "unflexibility" of school. She's not a morning person and is often late for school. She is very artistic but doesn't feel like she's getting to use those talents and has become bored with school. Basically, Penny is very frustrated with Becky. She wants her to get a good education and to actually get a diploma (she is concerned that Becky will drop out of school when she turns 16 because of how bored and frustrated she is with school).

As I listened to Penny talk, I could tell that there were a lot of issues that ran much deeper than school. After talking with her and explaining all of the different options that homeschooling offers, Penny remarked that she has been looking for some hope and that she thinks she's found it now. I gave her our home phone number and encouraged her to call and talk to my mom for more information.

After that 20 minute conversation, I continued with my running and made a mental note to make sure and tell Mom that she should be expecting a call in the next few days. That was at 8:30 this morning. When I returned home at 10:30, I said to my Mom, "Hey, you might be getting a phone call from a lady named Penny..." and at that point my Mom interrupted and said, "Yeah, she already called!". That was a lot faster than I had anticipated! I didn't even have time to give my mom any warning. Anyway, my mom will be meeting with Penny on Thursday to discuss the options that they have, and I'm also praying that she'll be able to share with Penny about the Giver of Eternal Hope, our Lord Jesus Christ! Penny mentioned to my Mom on the phone that she was raised in a VERY disfunctional, legalistic "Christian" home and she didn't want that for her daughter. She's also a single mom, which makes things challenging for her.

So, would you join me in praying for Penny and Becky? Now that we've talked, I feel like we have more of a relationship and I want to begin asking her about her spiritual beliefs, but I want the Lord's wisdom in what to say to someone who has been offended and turned off to "Christianity" because of her experiences. I'm also praying for wisdom for my mom as she meets with her on Thursday.

This morning didn't turn out like I was expecting it to. It definitely wasn't a typical day at the gym! But the Lord is teaching me that He wants me to be available to follow His leading wherever I am and whatever I'm doing. Even if people do ask me if I have a job...:-)

Blessings!
Bekah

A Verdict? Well, Not Quite.

2009-08-28T16:02:00.003-05:00

I've managed to eat dairy free for two and a half weeks now. Woohoo! I've stuck with it. Honestly, the first week was rough. Though I know it's not true, it seemed like everything in the world had dairy in it! And sometimes it was trace amounts, but dairy nonetheless. Live I've mentioned before, I'm not a big "meat eater" and now that I'm not eating dairy I'm noticing how my choices for protein are becoming rather limited. This girl can only eat so many nuts and chicken! (Did I mention that I don't really care for fish, either?)

Oh, and I realized that I never mentioned that I did weigh in on the morning after I returned from the Bright Lights conferences (it was a Wednesday morning). I was super excited! I only gained two pounds on the trip. Hurray! I met my goal and kept the damage low. :-) Because of that special Wednesday weigh in, I didn't weigh in again until this Friday.

This Friday, I weighed in at 181 pounds....only one pound lost in 9 days. Hmmm...maybe I don't have a dairy problem. (Which would be super! I miss my dairy products.) But I'm not going to throw the towel in just yet. I've decided to give it a month, and if I don't see an drastic changes in that time, then I'll slowly add dairy back into my diet. I guess that I was expecting something drastic to happen - like significant weight loss or feeling more energy and healthy, but I haven't had either of those. Any thoughts or suggestions from those of you who don't eat dairy? Am I missing something?

But through these past few weeks, I feel like the Lord has been reminding me again of the importance to delight in the little things. Like the fact that I only gained a few pounds while away from home, that I can stick to a drastic diet change (no dairy) for a few weeks, and also the one pound lost. Those are things that I've accomplished through the help of the Holy Spirit, and I should not focus on what I haven't done (need to lose more, need to do better) but on what I have done and what God is calling me to do today. Because if I'm so focused on that fact that I failed (which is what my mind is telling me) then I'm going to miss everything that the Lord is trying to tell me in the moment of my need, and I'll rely on my flesh to do what's right - and that never works!

So, I'm going to stay off of dairy for almost 2 more weeks and see what happens. Who knows? Maybe I need to practice a little patience while waiting to see any results. If nothing else, it's been a huge lesson in self-control!

Joyfully,
Bekah

Start young...

2009-08-22T17:24:00.007-05:00

As I was making my salad wrap for lunch today, Bethany walked in the kitchen and said that she wanted a salad, too. I'm always very happy when she requests healthy food, and I quickly made up a cute little salad for her. I've been pretty successful in getting her to eat almost anything (in fact, she's the one who really likes the smoothies that I make!) and at 3 years old, she basically wants to eat whatever her older sisters are eating!

So, we sat down and ate our salads. Everything was great, until she noticed that I had a whole wheat soft tortilla shell and she did not. She also noticed that I had hummus, which I had tried to hide from her. Rats! When it comes to my healthy food, I get very protective. :-) I frequently remind my family that there are only certain things in our house that I can eat, while they are free to eat whatever they want. So, back away from my food! I'm kind of like a chipmunk or a squirrel...I stock pile and hide it. In fact, I have a whole shelf in our pantry to myself - and everybody knows not to touch anything without asking! That is where I store my cereal and crackers, natural peanut butter and Kashi granol bars. I suppose that it's not very spiritually mature of me to be such a hog...but this is about survival!!! lol

Anyway, Bethany told me that she wanted a tortilla like mine...and some hummus, too. So, being the older and more mature of the two of us, I graciously went and grabbed half of a tortilla and spread some hummus on it for her. (The tortillas are the expensive Ezekiel 4:9 kind, so I wasn't going to give her a whole thing only to find out she wasn't hungry enough to eat it all - that would be such a waste!) She quickly devoured that half (which surprised me) and then wanted more. Have you all ever read the book, "If you give a mouse a cookie..."? Yeah, well this was turning out just like that book. I was scared that she wouldn't stop! Soon, she would demand not just my tortillas and hummus, but my peanut butter, my fruits and veggies, and...dare I even say it? My cereal!!!

But thankfully, her little tummy was full after consuming a whole tortilla and some hummus. I was saved!

Here is a picture I took of her eating her tortilla. I'm doing my best to get her to love fruits and veggies just as much as me. Just not my tortillas...

Whole Wheat Dairy Free Pancakes

2009-08-22T11:42:00.004-05:00

They turned out great! Very filling and yummy. I spread a little bit of natural peanut butter on them (to add some protein) and drizzled some honey on top. Delicious! I like them better than "regular" pancakes.

For those of you who'd like to give them a try, here's the recipe I found online for a basic dairy free pancake :

1 cup flour

3 T. sugar

2 t. baking soda

1/2 t. salt

1 cup plain unsweetened almond milk or non-dairy milk (I used soy)

1 large whole egg, slightly beaten

1 egg yolk, slightly beaten

1 1/2 t. oil

Mix dry ingredients together and make a well in the center of the bowl. In seperate bowl, mix liquid ingredients together and then pour into dry ingredients. Mix together - batter should still have a few lumps.

Then, fry them up on a greased skillet and enjoy!

Trip Pictures!

2009-08-20T20:42:00.009-05:00

Outside of the Creation Museum, hanging out with a cool dinosaur

In the flower gardens

Elisabeth, me, and Arianna - leaders of the Yellow Team

The entire yellow team!

Our team of Bright Lights leaders

Elisabeth, me, and Laura

My orderly bedroom on our trip!

The kitchen where all of the delicious meals were made!

Mary and I sporting our Iowa t-shirts!

Yes, I do still know how to write....

2009-08-20T19:58:00.004-05:00

...though I'm sure there are some of you who doubt that. But I'm back! I'm home! I'm writing again! Everybody cheer!!!! :-)

These past few weeks have been a whirlwind of activity for me. I'm busy planning for a class that I'll be teaching, and last week I was in Ohio helping with several Bright Lights conferences. I'm going to post some pictures from that trip below. It was great!

As far as the weight loss journey, I'm still plugging away. The weigh in before I left on the Bright Lights trip had me up 2 pounds to 180lbs again, but it was "that time of the month" and I frequently gain weight during those weeks. I wasn't too stressed about it. I was still eating healthy, exercising, and feeling great!

About a week before I left, I began mentally and spiritually preparing myself for the trip to Ohio, because I really really REALLY wanted to exercise my spirit over my flesh! I didn't want to come home having gained a lot of weight from making stupid choices. I simply wanted to maintain my weight and keep it within 2 pounds of my last weigh in. I knew that because I wouldn't be exercising like normal, I could expect to gain a few pounds. But I really wanted to keep it to two or less. I spent time in the Word, reviewing my "most helpful" passages of Scripture that talk about walking in the Spirit. And I prayed that I would walk in the strength and grace that the Lord freely provides from me. One thing that I really struggle with is "peer pressure eating", which is when I eat something only because there are other people eating, too. Not because I'm hungry, but because it looks good and I want to "fit in" and not have to explain why I'm not eating. Hmm...sounds like lust of the flesh, lust of the eyes, and pride of life. Yuck! I don't want to be living that. So, I purposed to "set my face like a flint" and stick to the principles of eating that the Lord has shown me over the past few years.

And praise the Lord, I had a GREAT time at the conferences. I have to give a HUGE thanks to the wonderful chefs for our group of leaders. You ladies made such delicious and healthy meals that it was easy to find something good to eat! (Love you, Sarah Joy and Lindsay...who don't even know this blog exists...oh, well!) Anyway, I was so proud of myself. Not in an arrogant way, but just happy with how I did. God's Word is true! His divine power has given us "everything we need for life and godliness". (2 Peter 1:3) I chose as many fruits and veggies with lean protein and whole grain breads as possible, and I felt great! I never experienced the "blahs" that often come when you eat lots of sugar, fat, or preservatives. And seeing I was only getting about 4 hours of sleep each night, I was so grateful for that!

And then, I had an interesting conversation with my mom at 11:15pm last Friday night. I was laying in bed and chatting with her about my day, how the conference went that night, and also what things were going on at home. We talked for about 20 minutes, and as we were about to hang up, she quickly mentioned that some of her friends that are "women who are following God's leading in regard to eating with their families and who eat a very raw and unprocessed diet" (in other words, her health nut friends - LOL! I love you ladies!) were at our house that day for a get together that my mom was hosting, and they suggested that I really REALLY should try cutting dairy out of my diet for two weeks and see what happens. They think that I must have some kind of allergy, because I can't seem to drop these last 15 pounds. I've resisted that idea in the past, because...well, because...I DON'T WANT TO GIVE IT UP!!! Do you know how many products have dairy in them??? Well, just try cutting dairy out of your diet, and you'll discover there is a huge sea -no, a gigantic ocean of things that you can't eat. It's hard. I'm not going to hide my feelings, and those of you who were with me on the Bright Lights trip know that I was complaining at every meal about what I couldn't eat! (I'm working on my attitude...:-)) Couldn't have cheese or sour cream on my taco salad, couldn't have cereal and milk for breakfast, no coffee for me - can't drink it without creamer, and good grief! - even Werther's have cream in them.

So anyway, I decided that starting last Saturday, I would cut dairy out of my diet. Now, if I'd been thinking, I would have waited until I got home and began exercising again and was back into my normal routine before starting. But, I didn't think of that. So, I'll be going off of dairy for almost 3 weeks, which might be better, because I should be thoroughly cleansed of it by then. This morning, as I was bemoaning the fact that I couldn't have my cereal for breakfast ( news flash - Bekah LOVES her cereal!!!!) I had a great thought. I was going to make homemade pancakes for breakfast and then drizzle honey on them. Yummy! I went and got my laptop out and did a google search for a recipe for dairy-free pancakes. And I found a ton of recipes. So with hopes that I could still manage to save my poor, pitiful breakfast, I clicked on a recipe and was ready to begin cooking. Yeah, well I encountered a small problem. You can't just cut the milk out of pancakes - you have to replace it with something. And I didn't have any almond, soy, or rice milk on hand. WAAAAAA!!!! This had turned into a disaster! I made a mental note to pick up some "fake milk" at the store today, and ate my dry cereal from a cup. Not exactly a happy morning. But, I've since been to the store and bought all of the ingredients I need for pancakes, so tomorrow morning should be much better!

I also started working out with a different DVD that I had gotten from the library, and I have a feeling that I'm going to be sore tomorrow. It felt so good to exercise again, but why don't I ever remember to ease myself back into it??? This blonde will figure it out one of these days...

Well, I think I finish this post and then start another post with pictures from my trip. I hope that some of you still get on here and read this, even though I never post anymore!

Love, Bekah

No, I haven't fallen off the face of the earth...

2009-07-20T10:58:00.005-05:00

It's about time I updated this little blog! This summer is quickly flying by and I'm trying to keep on top of everything, but often times certain activities (like blogging) fall by the wayside while I'm running to catch up with our crazy schedule.

And besides, I'm currently in a game of ping-pong in my weight loss, so it didn't seem like there was that much to report. Gain, lose, gain, lose, etc. Last week, I weighed in at 178lbs, which was up a pound from the previous week. So I'm even more determined to get rid of that silly pound this week! I have been slightly encouraged by the fact that some of my clothes have fit better on me. Not so tight in areas, a little more loose than I remember. A spring dress that I bought last year now hangs on me and looks rather droopy. This was a surprise to me, especially seeing I haven't lost any weight since then! And in all honesty, I'd rather focus on losing inches and becoming more trim and fit than losing weight anyway. The scale can be deceiving, but how my clothes fit will never lie.

A few weeks ago, my grandma and cousins came down from MN for a visit. We had a fun week together, and I was able to cook up some yummy, healthy, lower-calorie meals and convince my cousins to give them a try. (And they liked them!) Here are a few pictures from their visit with us.

Now, for those of you who looked at this last picture and thought, "Hmm...the license plate says Nana of 9, but there are only 8 in the picture." - let me explain. Our cousin Tyler didn't come down with Jordan and Sydney, so he's going to have to be photoshopped in at some point. :-)

So even though things are busy and even though I haven't been all that impressed with my weight loss this summer, I'm still learning and growing. I'm developing discipline and self-control in my life, and not just in the area of weight loss, though it's tempting to just isolate it there and not push myself to be disciplined in other areas. Like keeping my room clean and tidy, and finishing projects that I've started. (Those are hypothetical statements, by the way....Okay, maybe not!) I keep reminding myself that this whole journey is not just about my weight! My ultimate goal is Christ-likeness in EVERY area of my life. And as I'm disciplining my body in an effort to shed extra pounds, I'm also seeking to shed my heart of any unwanted sin and distraction from my King. I want a "thin" heart much more than a thin body!

Speaking of disciplining my body, I tried out a new DVD this morning for my workout. It's called, "Power Sculpt", but after doing it, I think it should be called, "Power PAIN and SWEATING!". lol I was grunting and pushing myself in our living room and my muscles were working hard. Ever done a curtesy lunge?...50 times in a row? Or pushups with T raises? I was acting like the trainers were really in the room, but despite my loud protests - they didn't stop for a break. They wore me out! Sometimes I think the buff trainers making the DVD's must have a conference each year where they brainstorm new ways to exercise which causes their clients to experience more burning muscles and exhaustion during workouts. I made it through the 40 minutes of grunt work (literally) and then went for a jog outside to round out my hour of exercising. And though I'm complaining about it, I felt great afterwards! It was nice to change things up and have a day outside of the gym. I always have more fun when I'm being told what to do and I don't have to make it up on my own. Besides, if I wake up sore tomorrow morning - it's not my fault. :-)

"It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery." Eph. 5:1

For Freedom ~ Bekah

Fashion find?

2009-06-30T15:12:00.005-05:00

I have found it! After years of seaching through store after store and trying on thousands of pieces of clothes, I have finally found the style of clothing that best fits my body shape. It's light and flowy, yet it hides all of my "trouble spots". It also happens to be very modest and feminine. I can't tell you how excited I was to discover this. My family is in agreement with me, and I'll begin sewing immediately! Curious to see? Here's a picture of me, sporting my new find:

Okay, so it's a joke. I won't be wearing a hoopskirt from now on. But, my sisters and I did agree that it was very slimming! So, there you go. Got hip and thigh trouble spots like me? Then maybe we should all ban together and bring hoopskirts back into fashion. If people could wear bell-bottoms, why can't we wear these modest (but also very big) skirts?

By the way, the pictures are from a picnic that we had out here on Sunday afternoon. It was a fun way to wrap up the 9 month class that I taught, which was based on the Laura Ingalls Wilder books. Our picnic was complete with games, a Spelling Bee, and a pie contest. And each of the girls from class recited a poem they had memorized during class. The weather was gorgeous, and we had a fun time being together...*sniff*...for the last time...*sniff*...as a class........**sob**! I'm going to miss those girls! We had some fabulous times together!

Now, at that picnic, I had to make smart choices about what I ate. For one thing, I gained a pound last week. Not quite sure why, but thinking I must have enjoyed too much liberty on the weekend with my calories. So I tried to be extra careful this weekend, but I still wanted to enjoy the special yummy food from the picnic. We had a crazy day on Saturday, and I wasn't able to exercise, which worried me a little - but that's life. Sometimes I just can't do what I want to, even though 95% of the time I can. I have to work with our family schedule, and it was pool day - not Bekah go exercising day. But I did climb up the stairs to the water slide several times with the girls, so that had to burn a few calories. Anyway, at the picnic I had a bowl of vegetable beef soup, (homemade by yours truly) some grapes and watermelon, a few carrots and broccoli florets, two homemade wheat biscuits, and a piece of the healthiest pie there. (Thank you, Gibson girls! I didn't feel guilty eating it, and it was delicious!) Overall, I was proud of myself for not "pigging out", because that would have been so easy to do. For some reason, when there is an abundance of food present, I get this feeling that I have to eat it all. Or at least, a lot of it! I'm trying to break that mindset, because it doesn't tend to bring weight loss. :-)

Because of a schedule change, I've been going earlier in the morning to exercise these days. On Mon-Fri, I'm to the fitness center by 7:45am, which makes me part of the "early morning crowd". Four other old ladies and me. Yep. While they spend the whole time chatting with each other and riding the exercise bikes, I'm in there sweating my heart out. They are pretty funny, especially one of the ladies that can't seem to multi-task very well. Anytime she talks while riding the bike, she stops pedaling till she finishes talking. Every time! Then she has to start up the bike and select her program again. And this happens several times in the course of 30 minutes! Somehow I don't think that's very effective. LOL It's always interesting, to say the least!

I'm keeping focused on the goal this week and continuing to lay aside that which hinders me. I pray that you are as well! ~Bekah

Woohoo!

2009-06-19T16:12:00.002-05:00

Can I get a drumroll, please? *drumroll noise* (How do you write a drumroll noise?) I am so excited because I had another successful week. On Friday, I weighed in at 176lbs, which was 2 more pounds lost that week. Hurray! As I told my family, "I must be on to something!". Really, it's just lower calorie intake and continuing to work out hard. Sounds easy, right? Well, not quite. I am happy to find that it's working - but not enjoying the fact that I have to be so careful about what and how much I eat. I'm always satisfied after each meal, but it is hard to sit there and realize that I can't have what everyone else can. Yes, I've gotten used to eating completely differently than my family does, but sometimes it's easy to get a "poor me" mindset. And it's not that my family eats really unhealthy foods. Our family has changed a lot over the past few years! Sometimes I can have what they eat - just in a limited, calorie conscience way. Sometimes the meal is very healthy, but I just can't afford the calories. It's all about balance! And these past two weeks have proven to me just how important it is eat balanced meals.

I feel like I'm simply returning to the basics. The basics of weight loss. Eat right and count your calories. Exercise. Drink water. Sleep. And ta-da! You'll lose weight. It was so nice to have 2 successful weeks.

Short post, but I'm out of time. Thankful ~ Bekah

Last week at a glance...

2009-06-15T21:37:00.002-05:00

I know what you're thinking. It's been 4 days since I weighed in, so you're thinking that I must be upset about it because I haven't posted till now. Well, you're WRONG! And I'm so happy about it. (Not just because I love being right, but because I'm not upset about it at all. ) I had a great week! And I was actually happy with the scale for once. Why? Because it told me that I lost 3 pounds. It's been a long time since I've lost that much in one week, and it put a smile on my face!

I cut my calories down and varied it from each day. 1200 calories on Monday, 1300 on Tuesday, 1400 on Wednesday and Thursday. I made a conscious effort to drink even more water (I felt like a water balloon!) and to monitor my portion sizes. One of the things that I started watching again was my protein intake. I was reminded of the fact that I am a "balanced oxidizer", which means that at every meal and snack my food should consist of 40% carbs, 30% fat, and 30% protein. Now, I don't get too technical about the percentages, but I estimate the best I can. While I have been eating healthy, I glanced back through my food journal and noticed that my fat and protein intake was low. That creates a problem for this carb lover! Unfortunately for me, I can't eat a meal that consists of only carbs and veggies. I need the healthy fat and protein, too. So, my favorite choices of those have been eggs, chicken, nuts (raw and unsalted), plain yogurt, milk, natural peanut butter, cottage cheese, beans, etc. I'm confident that I saw weight loss because I upped my intake of protein and fat this past week. Backing off on the carbs (insert a big sigh here!) and rounding out my meals is my road map to weight loss.

I also tried to just get myself moving more throughout the day. Yes, exercising in the morning is great, but there are things that I can do during the day that will get my heart rate up and my muscles moving. Jumping on the trampoline with my younger sisters is a wonderful lower body workout. Riding my bike around with them burns calories, too. Pulling weeds in the garden while holding a squat position is another way to tone my leg muscles! Running up our flight of stairs instead of walking and holding the railing...walking to the mail box instead of picking up the mail in the car after arriving home...etc. You don't have to be in a gym to get some exercise!

Like I mentioned, I pulled out a few of my fitness books to get some more ideas. I felt like I had been doing a lot of the same exercises for the past few weeks, and it was time for a change. I switched up my cardio workouts, adding some new exercises along with the old goodies. And I got more ideas of ways to tone my arms and abs. It was fun to challenge myself in new ways at the gym. I'm making progress, but still have a lot to work on!

And on top of changing my exercises and my meals, I also prayed and asked the Lord for wisdom. While reading through my favorite "go to for help!" books, I asked Him to show me what I was needing to change and how I should go about doing it. I asked Him to guide my thoughts on this topic. And He did! Once I was able to quiet my heart and listen while thumbing through the books, I began to get some ideas.

I was able to be joyful about what I was eating, because I knew it was the right amount and the right kind. I was able to enjoy my workouts, because it seemed new and exciting...and sometimes painful. :-) And I didn't have any fear or dread of the scale on Friday morning, because I knew that I'd done my best - no matter what number popped up. It was an encouraging week! I also gained many insights from the Word, which I have to post later this week.

When we call, our God answers! ~Bekah

Adventure Land!

2009-06-09T12:30:00.008-05:00

Leah and I were so scared of this ride. Actually, we ended up laughing at how not scary it turned out to be!
"6 in a raft and the little one says, "Move over! Move over!" We were always happy to find rides that at least half of our family (we had 11 people total!) could ride together.

Our last ride as the park was closing for the night.

Waiting in line. Yes, our family took up an entire section of the line!

Riding their hot pink motorcycles!

Smile! (Guess Grandpa didn't get the memo...)

More waiting in line = pictures!

On the teacups. It was the ride that never ended!!!

After my disappointing weigh in on May 29th, I was ready to get back on track. Our family spent the next day (Saturday) at Adventure Land, and it was a nice, hot day to spend outside. We left early that morning, so I wasn't able to fit in a workout. We were all scrambling to get things ready and packed, get the little girls dressed, do their hair, feed them, keep them happy, and then do the same for ourselves. The plan was to get to the park in time for lunch, as my dad's company was providing lunch for the employees and their families. (They also paid for our entrance tickets. Immediate family only, which still came out to 8 tickets for us! A huge blessing!) Anyway, I spent about 5 minutes that morning throwing together a salad and some snacks that I could eat during the day. I wasn't going to head to a theme park unprepared!

Turns out, after having to stop 3 times for a bathroom break on the way down there (it's 3 hours away) we barely made it in time for lunch. They served hamburgers and hotdogs, baked beans and chips. My salad was still in the van, and I wanted to save it for supper, so what did I do? Simple. I grabbed a hamburger and half of the bun, piled it high with lettuce and tomatoes, and I turned it into a hamburger salad. It was actually pretty good! Then the fun began. We walked all over that park, and often split up into small groups heading off in different directions to catch "big girl" or "little girl" rides. About 3 hours later, we all trekked out to the van for a snack of grapes and bing cherries. Yum! We also refilled out "illegal water bottles" (you can pack lots of stuff into 3 strollers!) and reapplied sunscreen. Well, everyone else did. I decided to go "all natural" that day and refused to put on sunscreen, thinking I'd get tan faster. Bad idea! My shoulder turned a nice flamingo pink and were quite sore for several days....

Even though we did a lot of walking, I still felt like I had a lot of energy to get out as we were leaving the park. Walking is good! But I didn't feel like I'd exercised a whole lot that day. However, it was nice to have a day that was different. I was hoping that maybe my body would like it, too.

Beginning on Sunday and going through till my next weigh in, I was having trouble getting my body back to where it was before. I felt hungry a lot, even though I'd eaten plenty at the previous meal. My body had gotten used to eating very frequently, especially when I was going to so many graduation parties, and it was a struggle to get back on track. I found myself eating bigger meals and snacks, because I didn't want to have to fight against the urge to eat between them. I did record my meals, though, and was trying hard. And I had great workouts! I spent an hour on the treadmill one day and went almost 5 miles, which I hadn't done before. I did about 65% running and 35% walking, and my legs were quite sore the next day. ;) So, I was hoping that my exercising would be enough to compensate for some extra calories I'd consumed. The weekends are the hardest days for me to be disciplined, and I'd eaten more than I should have. It's hard to not feel deprived and to not give in when you're REALLY craving something!

Anyway, I gained a pound last week. My exercise wasn't enough to make up for some wrong snacking, which had me frustrated with myself and with the whole weight loss process. Why? Why? Why? That's what I wanted to know. Why me? Why is it so hard? Why can't I lose this weight? Why does one or two dumb choices have to ruin an entire week of work? Why isn't there another way to lose weight? Why? Why? WHY???

I wasn't ever contemplating quitting, but I spent a lot of time griping and complaining in my heart that Friday morning as I was driving into town. I was discouraged and I let my guard down, and that's when thoughts of doubt and jealously began creeping in again. Let's just say that I wasn't exactly a happy camper! But I began to pour out my thoughts to the Lord and just take some time to get everything off my chest. I talked just like Jesus was sitting in the car next to me. And I was reminded again of this truth - you can't spend time in the presence of the Lord and not be changed. Because let me tell you, when I got into the car and started driving into town I was an unhappy, discouraged, and frustrated person. But as I spent time communing with my Savior, I became living proof that "In Your presence is fullness of joy", and "Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom". As I was praising and thanking Jesus, confessing sins and asking for strength, and simply spending time with Him, my whole attitude changed. I felt peaceful and calm, knowing that I am His and He is still in control. Gaining a pound didn't change that. I'm not a loser or a failure. No, I am more than a conqueror through Him who loved me and gave Himself for me! And so are you, my friend.

So now, I'm excited about this week. I thought it would be a good idea to pull out a few of my resource books and read through them again. I've gotten more ideas and tips that I'm putting into practice this week. Again, I had a rocky weekend (not catastrophic, but there is still room for improvement) so prayers are appreciated. But overall, I'm walking in His strength and believing that in Christ, I can do all things!

Our God reigns ~ Bekah

Back again!

2009-06-01T17:17:00.003-05:00

No! Not again! I'm so behind that I don't even know where to begin. I guess I'll very quickly give a recap and then get caught up to recent happenings.

After having a week where the scale stood still, I really pushed hard the following week. I gave it 100% in the gym; I counted my calories. I was disciplined. I was focused. I wanted success! I was expecting to see that I'd lost a pound or even two when I got on the scale that Friday morning. But I didn't get it. The scale didn't budge. I was stuck at 176 again. Refusing to feel defeated, I simply focused on the other victories I'd gained that week. I felt energetic and strong. I had remained disciplined throughout the whole week and didn't have any regrets. It was a good week, whether the scale was my friend or not.

The following Monday, my family headed to the Twin Cities. While the rest of my family spent the week with our relatives up there, I jumped on a plane bound for Denver, Colorado to spend a week with my dear friend, Stephanie (and her wonderful family!). We had a fabulous time together! I immensely enjoyed being there for her high school graduation ceremony and party. It was a trip that I'll always cherish in my memories. With everything going on, exercise was out of the question, and I knew that would be the case before going. To be honest, I actually enjoyed the break. It was nice to not have to worry about it. But when I got back home, I was right back with the program!

Stephanie and I went to 6 graduation parties in two days, which made for eating more than we normally would. We kept looking at each other and thinking, "Good thing graduation parties only come once a year!". With the lack of exercise and higher calorie intake, I knew that I would gain a few pounds. It was going to happen, and I didn't get all wound up or stressed about it. What comes on will come off with enough work and sweat!

I weighed myself when I got home and had the attitude of, "What's the damage this time?". Came out to be 4 pounds of damage, so I'm back up to 180lbs. My work is clearly cut out for me. This morning, I was back in the gym for the first time in almost 2 weeks. It felt SO good! However, I felt rather pathetic. What was once relatively easy felt unusually difficult today. I'm going to work to get back to where I was, and then I'll keep pushing forward.

When I pulled out my bucket of "spring/summer clothes" a few weeks ago, I thought it would be fun. I was tired of my winter clothes and was ready for the bright colors and fun patterns of spring! But I found that as I was pulling shirts, shorts, skirts, and Capri out of the bucket and trying them on, it wasn't as fun as I expected it to be. I had to fight thoughts of failure and discouragement as I stood in front of the mirror, modeling my new wardrobe. "You've made absolutely no progress in a year! Look at you. Those clothes fit you the same they did last year. In fact, aren't you up a few pounds then you were a year ago? Well, just face it. You're stuck here at this weight and size. You might as well accept it and stop pushing so hard for what you can't achieve."

I'll be honest - it was hard. I was having a power struggle in my mind. Would I focus on the negative or the positive? Would I succumb to a pity party or would I choose to keep my eyes focused on Jesus?

It's at times like those that I have to remind myself of the goal here. It's not to be a size 4, to run a marathon, or to get compliments everywhere I go. My ultimate goal is Christ-likeness. That's why I'm doing this! I want Christ to be Lord of every area of my life, so that He can freely shine through me. This life I live is not my own - it's His. May I keep that truth in the front of my mind all day long!

More soon ~ Bekah

Spring is here!

2009-05-11T12:26:00.002-05:00

I'm so glad that spring is finally here! I know, it's actually been spring for several weeks, but now it's starting to feel like it. I've been soaking up the sunshine while planting the garden and playing on the swing set with my sisters. It's glorious! Now if only we could get the wind to die down a little...

I love this time of year, because there are so many things you can do outside - and many of them even count as exercise. On a beautiful day, there is no reason to stay inside and sit. Good grief, that's what we did all winter long! Let's get outside and get moving.

My younger sister, Bethany, and I spent time outside before her nap today. I pushed her on the swing, and then she decided that we should go and sing on the stage. "The stage" happens to be on our feed floor between the barns where the concrete is higher on one side than the other, making it a perfect stage. (Right? C'mon - think like a 3 year old!) While jammin' and dancin' to "John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt", Bethany started jumping on and off of the stage, and then she grabbed my hand so I could do it with her. Jump up, jump down, jump up, jump down. We did it over and over again. It was simple. It was fun. And it was exercise! That little girl will whip me into shape yet.

But now I remembered, I still haven't posted about last week yet. My week was wonderful in the exercise category. I pushed myself hard and tried to simply do more - more reps or more weight on the weight machines, and more time on the cardio machines. And believe me, my knees and my lower back could feel the difference. =) I didn't pull a muscle, but I did make them sore. I always left the gym feeling exhausted, but also refreshed.

However, in the eating category I believe that overall I consumed too many calories. This would explain why I gained one pound last week. Yes, I was rather disappointed when I saw 176 pop up on the scale. It's hard not to feel like a whole week of exercising was for nothing! Now, I didn't indulge in chocolate cake or have one meal where I blew it, but I think the combination of a few days where my calorie counts were slightly higher than they should be (between 100 and 200 calories over) is to blame. Which is actually me to blame. =) So this week, I'm sticking hard and fast to my calorie limit, no matter how much I'd like an extra helping. When I balance my calories out during the day and eat the correct combo of fuel, (proteins, fats, and carbs) I honestly do not feel hungry until meal times. And that's how it should be! Speaking of which, my tummy is telling me it's almost snack time. =)

Today, I decided to stay home from the gym and do things the old fashioned way. I grabbed a jump rope and my water bottle and set out for the feed floor. I made up a list of several different cardio exercises to do in a circuit and took off. I began by doing the "run and touch the cone and then run back to start" 6 times, followed by jumping rope 50 times. Then 30 seconds of standing mountain climber, (get the picture in your head!) 30 seconds of butt kicks, 30 seconds of double jumping to the side, 20 sumo squat jacks (like jumping jacks only harder), and 30 seconds of shadow-boxing. I completed each part of the circuit as quickly as possible and moved onto the next exercise without a break. I did this whole thing 5 times and then followed it up with some more jogging and step ups. (Remember the concrete that makes a good stage? It also makes a good place to jump and step up.) After I finished outside, I came in and did one 30 minute workout with the DVD. My whole time spent exercising this morning was an hour and 20 minutes, and it felt great.

Okay, now I'm really getting hungry. I'll have to write more later! LOL

Blessings on your week ~
Bekah

Interesting times...

2009-05-01T15:00:00.005-05:00

Patience and perserverance does eventually pay off. Sweating, groaning, counting calories, more sweating, drinking water...and doing it every day makes for a successful week. (Well, at least it worked this week.) I lost two pounds! And I'm on my way back to where I used to be. That sentence reminds me of a line from a pathetic country song. LOL

Speaking of pathetic country songs, I had the most amusing and entertaining day at the gym last week. There are multiple TVs for people to watch while working out on the treadmill, bikes, or elliptical machines (while we try to take our minds off of the pain and breathless feelings we frequently experience!). Anyway, I walked into the gym one morning and saw that there was one other person there. And this woman must like country music, because while walking on the treadmill her eyes were glued to the TV. She was watching the "Top 20 Country Music Videos". So, I popped in my earphones and jumped onto and elliptical machine, trying to focus on my workout. I usually bring along an MP3 player to listen to while working out because #1 - Listening to jumpy music makes me feel more energetic #2 - I don't have to listen to all of the other interesting conversations taking place between the other gym members and #3 - If they are watching something inappropriate on the TV, I don't have to. Oh, and #4 - It makes me look cool. LOL!!!!

So, I'm trying to get my brain focused and just be in my "own little world" while plugging away, but my eyes kept getting drawn to the TV. (Am I the only person with this problem?) Where I was positioned on the elliptical, the TV was almost directly in front of me, and I was trying to keep my head up (to keep good posture - important!) but the TV was right in my line of view. Not only did the lady have to channel on, she also had the closed captioning turned on, so there were the words to the Top 20 Songs for me to read. Why she had the closed captioning turned on, I don't know. She had the music playing loud enough as it was. In case you've never been subjected to listening (or reading) country music songs, let me tell you - THEY ARE PATHETIC!!!!! Oh, my goodness. I was trying to stiffle my laughter at how someone could actually listen to that junk. All of the songs seemed to have a few common themes running through them like, "Baby, COME BACK!!! I'm so sorry!!!!! I shouldn't have been so selfish!!!!! How was I supposed to know that you knew that I was cheating on you????? I won't do it again. I've learned my lesson!!!! PLEASE COME BACK!!! I'll do anything! Another theme - Fine! Leave me! I don't need you anyway! I've got my dog and my truck. I'm strong enough on my own! I'm smarter than you! You'll be the sorry one because.......because.......you don't have a dog or a truck!!!! I had to fight the temptation to burst out in song, following the words on the screen while turning to the lady and saying, "Come on! Sing along!". LOL Can you imagine a "country music sing along"? Horror of all horrors!

That's just one example of the interesting times I've had while working out. Keeps me laughing!

Pressing on ~ Bekah

Desperately Trying To Catch Up!

2009-04-28T08:35:00.009-05:00

What can I say? I'm a busy woman. =) However, keeping up with this blog is important to me so I'm making the time to sit down and write, write, write!

Let's see. I'll pick up right where I left off, which was the weekend before the Bright Lights Conferences in Omaha. I'd just come off a week of amazing hours spent busting my tail off at the gym, keeping track of calories and balancing my meals, only to see the scale show I'd gained weight. So I was quite uncertain about how my body would react to being away from home for a week - with no time to exercise, temptations everywhere, (as in food temptations) plenty of stress, and a lack of sleep. That is a disaster waiting to happen!

But, I was determined to make the best of it. I can't hide at home for the rest of my life! I need to be taking part in ministry opportunities, even if I was expecting a set-back in my weight loss. An opportunity for spiritual growth trumps physical growth every time. That's not to excuse the physical, because (as in my case) taking care of the physical has allowed me, forced me to grow spiritually in ways that I never would have without focusing on the physical. (Just wanted to clarify that so you don't get any ideas...)

I packed my own cereal to take with me, along with some Kashi crackers that I could snack on, some dark chocolate (in little individual wrappers), and a few pieces of fruit. Everyone was to bring a sack lunch on the day that we left, so I packed myself a salad, fruit, and homemade wheat bread with honey. I was doing my best!!!

Along with Alex, (who is a godly, wonderful, and fun leader from Texas!) I was in charge of coming up with meals for our staff for the week. Thankfully, a few of the meals were being provided for us by some local families, but we came up with the rest. We sat down and planned out the meals, made a long grocery list, got the keys to a mini-van, and found the nearest Walmart! I made sure that we loaded up our carts with plenty of fresh foods and healthy snacks. (Okay, it was a selfish move. But other people eat like me, too! Yes, it's true. I'm not the only one who tries to eat healthy in our Bright Lights staff!) We had fun, and we did our best to come up with healthy, fast recipes that would satisfy everybody.

And so, the conference work began. Remember how I mentioned nights without a lot of sleep? And my stress levels soaring? Bad bad bad scenario for me. If I would have to rate how I did in the eating catagory on a scale of 1 to 10 (10 being the best), I would give myself a 4. Here's why - even though I hate to admit it, I could have exercised a lot more self control. Man - that seems to be a re-ocurring theme in my life! I did okay, but not great. We had lots of healthy food available and I took advantage of that...but I also made some dumb choices. I found myself a few times eating/snacking simply because everyone else was, not because I was hungry. I remember one night, we were all chilling in our "lounge and bedroom" (which happened to be a Sunday school class) and I grabbed some snacks to munch on. After several handfuls had passed through my mouth, I suddenly thought, "What in the world are you doing? You're not hungry. Put that down - NOW!". By God's grace, I was able to stop that night. But it wasn't the case every night. Actually, I had to fight temptations no matter what time of day it was! There was always food around and easily available. And, whether it was late at night or bright and early and I was tired and stressed, I'd often head to the kitchen and grab something to eat. Emotional eating is such a hard habit to break! I've broken it while here at home, but now I need to learn how to conquer it away from home.

So, it wasn't a catastrophic week. I did have some good moments! One night, I had convinced myself to go and snack on something in the kitchen, so I walked into the room and made sure no one else was in there. (Oh, that's another thing I've learned. If you feel like you have to hide what you're eating from anyone - get out of the pantry! Secrecy is only necessary if you feel guilty about what you're eating and you KNOW you shouldn't eat it. So, don't eat in secret!) Anyway, I scrounged around, trying to decide what sounded good. But I could have done much better. There is always something to learn along this journey. God's grace is enough for me; His power is made perfect in my weakness. I just have to chose to believe it and walk in that truth!

We arrived home from the conferences on Sunday night, and I decided to just wait and weigh myself the next Friday. To be honest, I didn't really want to see what the scale had to say! I thought it would be best if I had a few days at home of exercising before getting on the scale again. =) On Monday morning, as I began doing my workout I knew I'd gained some weight. Exercising seemed a lot harder than usual. I had to push through it and deal with the sore muscles on Tuesday morning. It was also harder to curb my appetite, as I had been feeding my tummy more than it needed all week and at odd hours.

One thing that always makes me smile is when Bethany wants to exercise with me. She was eager to join in on Monday morning, and it was a nice boost to my motivation as I got back into my regular schedule again. I had Leah take this video of the two of us working out in our laundry room. Lead told me that even though she was tilting her camera to take the video, it would turn out right side up. NOT! Sorry for the sideways view...just tilt your head. LOL

Long story short, I got on the scale and saw the number 177 flash up at me. Seven pounds gained. Ouch. That wasn't a happy moment as I stood there on the scale, fighting to push all of the moments of regret out of my mind. It was painful, realizing that I had pushed myself back so far. This is not what I needed to do! At one point in time, I had been 12 pounds lighter. Why couldn't I keep losing? Why? Why? Why?

There are lots of questions that I still don't have the answers for. But at least right now, I should be able to lose these 7 pounds in the next few weeks. I can work to get back down to where I was! (How pathetic is that...)

This post is long enough, so I'll stop here. I'm hoping for a good number this week, because I've been doing great! Praise the Lord for His power to change and to restore.

Love, Bekah

Trying to catch up!

2009-04-21T14:31:00.004-05:00

My my my! How time flies. I have sat down at my computer several times in the last few weeks with the intent of updating this blog, but other "more important" things always came up. So now, I've grabbed a few minutes of time this afternoon and am attempting to write without interruptions. (We'll see how far I make it...)

Where to begin? This is why I hate getting behind in posting. So much information to tell! First off, I never posted about my weigh in on April 10th. That week, I made it into the gym every single day! I spent at least 10 hours exercising that week, and it was fun. I was interested to see which muscles needed more work and which ones I had been training pretty well at home. My triceps and thighs were pretty sore the first few days, but it was that "this kind of hurts but I know it's a good thing, because the soreness is a sign of muscle growth" kind of deal. I had kept track of my calories, and I felt that I was getting more control on that front as well. I still sometimes struggle with getting stuck in a rut with meals, so I tried to branch out more. When I notice in my notebook that I seem to be eating the same things at the same meals for a few days, I come up with something completely different and try to keep things balanced out.

But, guess what? My body was still on strike or had an attitude 'bout something, because the scale said I'd gained two pounds. I was like, "Excuse me? I didn't exercise at the fitness center EVERY DAY for at least an hour so that you could tell me I gained weight!". That was a bummer, but I had to realize that I was not defined by that number. That number on the scale did not represent all of my hard work that week, and I wasn't going to let it get me down. Okay, the scale was up two pounds. But I did my part! And one of these days, my body will do its part. I just wish it would hurry up...

I think the weeks where the number on the scale doesn't make sense are some of the most important weeks. I learn the most through them. It's just like any other hardship or trial - we have to make a choice. Are we going to learn the lessons God has for us, or keep coming around the mountain until we do? I have so much to learn! So many things that are not just about weight loss, but things that apply to other areas in life, too. I have to learn to keep going when I see results that are opposite than what I want. I have to learn to let God's Word be the only thing that defines my worth and value. I have to learn how to keep my guard up at all times, because the moment that I let it down I am bombarted with temptations that I too often give in to. I have to learn that ultimately - life isn't all about me. (Shocking, I know.) God still has work for me to accomplish and still wants me to bring Him glory even when the scale shows I'm not making tangible progress. And to be honest, I'm glad for the struggle. I'm glad for the fight! I'm glad that I'm not one of those ladies you see on magazine covers or in commercials wearing skimpy bathing suits proudly proclaiming, "I lost 30 pounds in 4 weeks!" or whatever their case may be. Because they had instant success. They didn't have to work for it, or at least not nearly as hard as I have. I can be proud of my success because I know all the work that I've put into it!

My few minutes are up, but I've only just begun to catch up with y'all. Maybe later tonight or tomorrow I'll find a few more free minutes. I'll conclude with some pictures of the place I've been hanging out most mornings. I've had some fun times in there!

Love, Bekah

The Start of Something New...

2009-04-06T14:53:00.003-05:00

Well, I did it. I became a member of the fitness center, "The Edge" this morning. I went in at 9:00 this morning to get "assessed" and learn how to work all of the nifty machines.

Shari first began by taking me to each of their weight machines. She showed me how to properly perform each of the exercises and recording how much weight I was able to push, pull, lift, and lower. It was fun! I'm excited to finally have the opportunity to work on toning my muscles and working them more effectively than with just my hand weights here at home. At each machine, Shari would guess on how much weight I could do, and then we'd adjust it as needed. A few times, I said, "Oh, yeah. This is perfect. Leave the weight right here," after performing 2 reps, but by rep 5 or 6 I was like, "Um, okay. Let's take a little weight off!". I have much to work up to, my friends! But I was proud of the fact that even though I'd never used one of those machines before, I was able to do an average amount of weight during the exercises. There is a lot that you can accomplish at home with simple little hand weights! Start there! I'm still planning to use them, even if I do use machines at the gym. You can perform innumerable exercises with them! They are much more versatile than any weight machine. Be creative and work your muscles!

The whole assessment took about 45 minutes, and then she showed me how to work all of their different cardio machines. I've fallen in love with the Elliptical and the Stair Master!!! I had a blast working out. I was sweating and panting, but somehow it was just more fun than at home. Change is a good thing!

I also spent time riding a bike, and at first it actually seemed kind of easy. So I decided to press the "hill" button. Bad idea! Well, actually it was a great challenge. But my quad muscles did NOT appreciate it. My quads were burning so bad I thought they were going to start on fire! Whew! I was glad when my time was up on that torture machine. LOL

I also had to smile, because even though this gym looks really nice and has lots to offer, it's still located in a small, rural town. I didn't meet any "hunks" or "Barbies" while exercising. (You know, people with bigger muscles and/or smaller waists than should be legal.) And I was glad. Because being healthy is not about that!

The people who came in to the fitness center were like you and me - regular people. People who aren't trying to look like the warped and twisted model of "beauty" we see on the magazine covers. We were all there, sweating it out this morning, because we want to be fit and healthy.
There was a sweet 70 year old lady doing leg presses, bicep curls, and the recumbent bike, a lady in her 60's who wanted to improve her leg muscles and her abs, and couple in their 40's who come and work out together (and who also compete with each other on each cardio machine to see who can go the furthest, the longest, etc), a busy mom who carves out time in her day to get in some exercise, a guy in a V-shirt with pajama pants and sandals who spent the majority of his time there lifting weights (his appearance almost made me laugh outright! But, hey -at least he was doing something worthwhile), and then me - a twenty year old who wants to lose the last 10-20 pounds of excess weight. We were quite the bunch! But I loved it. It was real life.

My plan is to make it in to the fitness center at least 3 days a week, so mom and I are going to look at my morning schedule and see what we can come up with. I'm so pumped! The girls called me at noon and were like, "Where ARE you?" I had to pull myself away from there this morning. I'm sure the novelty will wear off, but hopefully not anytime soon!

Hurray for fitness centers! ~Bekah

100 posts...

2009-04-04T16:34:00.003-05:00

Here it is - my 100th post! It seems like I should have some great and inspiring words of wisdom to write, because this is such a special post. But, I don't. =) You'll just have to put up with my normal way of writing about the normal days of my life last week.

Last week was...unpredictable. I felt like there were many instances during the week when my plans or the way I thought things were going to turn out didn't happen. A few days I had to change up my regular exercise time and just "go with the flow" as my day went along. And a few times, I ended up eating differently than I had planned. I do my best to pack a lunch and healthy snack any time that I know we'll be in town. It not only saves me money, but also I can plan exactly what I'm going to eat. There is no room for temptation if I've already got my meals planned out! I kept track of my calories every day and worked to stay around 1,400 calories/day, which I managed to do. Again, with a few unexpected changes in scheduling during the week and a few meals that weren't part of my plan, I think I ate closer to 1,500/1,600 two days. But nothing catastrophic! Overall, another good week.

So, when the scale showed 168lbs yesterday morning, I was a little surprised but not too disappointed. That put me up a pound, but in the grand scheme of things, it's not that big of a deal. I was hoping for weight loss, of course, but I'm not sweating it about one measly pound. =)

The past few weeks, I've been contemplating joining a gym. I've never really seriously thought about it because - 1. it costs money and 2. we don't live anywhere near a gym! I assumed that the nearest one was 30 minutes away, and it didn't make sense to pay for a membership and gas money to get there and back. But, my mom pointed out a little store front in a small town about 15 minutes away, and a sign on the front of the store said that it was a place for women to do circuit exercising. (No, this isn't a Curves, but it is set up very similar.) Anyway, my mom suggested that I go and check it out. I wasn't too excited about doing it, simply because I wasn't expecting it to amount to much, so the next time my mom was going to be driving past there, I asked her to stop and see what she thought. Turns out, it wasn't exactly what I was looking for in a gym!

My mom told me she walked in and was greeted by an 85 year old lady. No, the lady wasn't working out (but she told mom that she did come in 3 times a week to exercise). This sweet old lady was there to run the place. No kidding! Mom came back and told me what the place had to offer, which wasn't much more than I have here, and I just had to laugh. Not exactly what I was expecting!

But even though that place didn't work out, I knew of another small fitness center in another small town "close" to us. (Close is a relative term!) I went to check it out on Wednesday of last week. It's part of a hotel, but the owner offers membership to anyone. I walked in and was impressed to see a decked out exercising room...but it was empty. Not a soul there. I looked around for an employee and then saw a sign that said to go to the hotel lobby if you had questions about the fitness center. So, I walked through the maze of the hotel and found a lady at the front counter who answered my questions. They currently don't offer any classes, which was disappointing - I really wanted to just start out slow by joining a class and then seeing if I wanted to do anything more. I feel like I need to mix up my exercise regimen, and I was hoping to find a spinning or kickboxing class. Oh, well.

I then asked the lady (Shari) what the gym had to offer and what the membership cost. I told her a very brief history of my weight loss and what I was looking for. She was very helpful and suggested that I come in one day and let her give me an assessment and then she'd show me how to work all the equipment. So, on Monday morning I'll be heading in to the fitness center to be assessed and learn how to work all the awesome equipment. I'm going to try and get in there 3 times a week for a month and then I'll see how it's working for me. The membership is very reasonable, and if every day is like the day I was there - I may have the whole place to myself. =) I'll make sure and give you a complete report on how it goes!

Love you all ~Bekah

What goes up must come down...

2009-03-27T20:47:00.003-05:00

This week, I've ridden back up to the top of the hill that I went down last week. I lost two pounds! That gave me such a mental boost. I was able to walk out of the bathroom after facing the "dreaded scale" and feel proud and relieved this morning. And that's a nice feeling!

The secret to my success? Simple. I recorded every morsel of food that I ate and kept my daily calorie count at 1,400. My exercising was the same intensity and the same amount of time. The only difference I made in my normal schedule was adjusting my calorie allowance, so I have no doubt that is the reason for my dropping not one, but two pounds. I'm kind of kicking myself right now. Seems I should have done this months ago! Why didn't I ever do it? Everyone in the diet and fitness world talk about the importance of recording your meals. I know that. Remember? I kept track of my meals for months! But I stopped awhile ago. And that was because I thought I had learned what I needed to and that I could keep track well enough in my head. I know the calorie count per serving in most everything by now! So I assumed that I could do fine without recording. My thought process was this : people can't keep track of their meals for the rest of their lives! At some point, I figured that I would somehow graduate out of the realm of recording meals, as if it was something that only those beginning to try and lose weight had to do. I felt like it was a crutch, a sign of weakness. You know what I mean? Maybe not, if you've never tried to lose weight. But those of you who have can probably relate.

Anyway, I grabbed an empty notebook and began the recording process again. I was under the impression that I was eating just fine; that all I would find after recording my meals for a week was that I was eating right and it wasn't contributing to my plateau problem. Hmmm...must have been wrong there! It was an eye-opener for me. I was eating too much. Again, not a huge amount. But enough that it kept me stuck. Math is a huge part of weight loss, much to my disappointment. (I've never enjoyed math - ever!) For the past several months, I've been eating enough to maintain my weight. That's why one week I'd lose, the next week I'd gain, etc. But, I stayed at the same general weight. So I'm hoping, REALLY hoping that this is the answer to my plateau problem. This next week, I'll be keeping my record notebook right by my side!

Rejoicing in Him ~ Bekah

My week at a glance...

2009-03-20T11:34:00.003-05:00

Two pounds up this week. Not what I was hoping for. Back to that stinkin' number 169. Rats! But I know that my high calorie day last Friday is partially to blame for that. I did not exercise self-control that day. Yes, I did eat a few things that I normally wouldn't have. However, I think the biggest problem was what I posted about last time - not controlling myself when eating healthy things. I set myself up for a week that would require an insane amount of exercising in order to burn off all of those calories, and I couldn't make time to be insane this past week. So, I wasn't too surprised at the result. Of course, I always hope for the best. But the calories I take in must be lower and calories I put out must be higher. That didn't happen this week, and it's only made me even more motivated to cooperate with Jesus and "Just Do It!" next week.

I did have some good times last week. I decided to go out running down our gravel road on Wednesday morning instead of using the treadmill. That was harder than I thought it would be! First off, it was cold - I think 38 degrees. And secondly, running on mushy gravel (complete with hills) was much more challenging than the treadmill. My goal was simple - keep running and don't stop! I was SO tempted to start walking when my heart was pounding and my calves were burning. Have you ever exercised so hard that you felt like your heart was in your throat? Well, that's what I felt like. I ran the first mile and came to the end of our road, and there I took a one minute break to get my heart rate under control. And I was (again) reminded of how far I've come. For me to run all the way to the end of the road without stopping was a "first". I used to try and run the length of 2 or 3 telephone poles, (that's how we country people measure things) and I'd be out of breath and have to stop and take a break before moving on. That was a year ago. This year, I made it the whole way. I took a break for a minute, then started jogging back home. I was freezing cold (and had worked up a cold sweat - yuck!) and I just kept putting one foot in front of the other. I made it home and ran in the house to check my time. I was actually impressed with myself. I ran it in 20 minutes! That made me feel good. I am making progress! But, I didn't stop to celebrate. I headed down to the basement and hopped on the Norditrack for 20 minutes, and then I did 20 minutes of my cardio workout DVD. (My favorite one is the kickboxing segment!)

Overall, my exercising was great this week. I just didn't do enough to account for my high calorie intake. If I could only get this together! Eating controlled and exercising hard in the same week makes for success on the scale. I know that, now it's time to do it. Does anyone else ever struggle with doing what you know is right? I do, and not just in this area of weight loss. Like I've said before, the truths that I'm learning to help with weight loss also apply to many other areas of life. I'm not just getting a physical makeover; I'm getting a spiritual one, too!

I grabbed an empty notebook this morning and will record my meals/snacks. I'm going to face the calorie facts! I've decided to eat 1,300-1,400 calories a day this week. It's challenging to do that. It feels like you're eating like a bird! But I want success on the scale and a stronger, healthier body more than a second helping. I really do! And it's time to check myself and make sure my actions line up with my words.

On a lighter note, I went out clothes shopping on Wednesday afternoon. Remember how I used to hate that? Well, I don't dread it anymore. I can shop in the normal "misses" section! I currently fit nicely into a size 14, and I'd like to see that drop to a size 12 by the end of this summer. I think that ultimately wearing between a size 10 and 12 would suit me perfectly. I can't wait until the weather stays nice and more like spring so that I can get outside. Walking, running, gardening, jumping on the trampoline, chasing my younger sisters, riding my bike, etc. So many different ways to burn off calories! What are YOU going to do to get more active?

Last night, I made some delicious bran muffins. They are chock full of fiber and a great, healthy snack. I thought I'd share the recipe with you. This particular recipe is called, "Refrigerator Bran Muffins", because the batter will keep in your fridge for up to 6 weeks. That's a good thing, because the batter is enough for 4 -5 dozen muffins so we just keep baking them when we run out! Anyway, I altered the recipe to make it more healthy. I substituted shortening with butter, white sugar with brown rice syrup and honey, and whole wheat flour for white flour. And they turned out quite yummy, if I do say so myself!

Refrigerator Bran Muffins

3 cups white sugar (or brown rice syrup/honey)
1 cup shortening (or butter or a healthy oil)
1 tsp salt
2 cups boiling water
4 cups Kelloggs All Bran (any kind of bran flakes)
2 cups 100% Nabisco All Bran (any kind of all bran cereal - my mom said it looks like rabbit food! lol)
1 qt. buttermilk
5 cups flour
4 eggs beaten

Pour hot water over Nabisco. Cream shortening and sugar. Add eggs, buttermilk, and Nabisco. Sift flour, soda, and salt. Add all at once with Kelloggs All Bran. Mix only until dry ingredients are moistened. Bake in greased muffin tins for 15-20 minutes at 400 degrees. This will keep covered in the fridge for 6-7 weeks.

Enjoy! Continuing on my journey ~ Bekah

Control...Control...Control yourself, Bekah!

2009-03-14T15:13:00.005-05:00

Whew! My apologies for going so long without writing. After that whole week of feeling achy and weak, I've finally gotten back to normal. Exercising was done a little slower and a little less intensive for the first few days that I was up and around again. Things that were easy seemed quite a bit harder! Coming off of a week of sickness and laying around and having a tiny appetite, (which resulted in my four pound loss) I was assuming that I'd gain weight this week, simply because I have my normal appetite back and my body isn't fighting sickness anymore. That wasn't an excuse for me to ""take it easy" another for another week, though. If anything, I tried to push harder! But that was difficult seeing I felt so...behind, so weak. I've been having a lot of fun with my newest cardio workout DVD, and doing something new gave me just the boost I needed to keep plugging along. It also showed me which muscles I needed to concentrate on strengthening, as I was a little sore after doing some "new" exercises. One thing I've learned about exercise is this - There is always room for improvement!

I think that one of the benefits of being sick (believe me, there's only a few!) was the fact that I was gently reminded again of my weakness for making larger portion sizes than I really need. Oh! This is always a struggle for me. Now, instead of getting full from chips - I stuff myself with broccoli....or something nutritious. =) It doesn't really matter that I've switched to eating more healthy if I still can't control myself! The food isn't the problem - giving into my flesh is the problem.

So, I've been attempting to prepare adequate sized meals this weekend. I'm trying to stop rushing my meals and eating slowly. Not pathetically slow, just slower that what I had been doing. My stomach doesn't have taste buds, only my mouth. So why shovel food down without even enjoying how it tastes? That only sets me up to want more food. Are you seeing the opportunity for a vicious cycle?

The scale showed 167 this week. And even though that is two pounds higher than last week, I was actually encouraged by that. Sure, I would have loved to continue losing! But I'm just glad that my body didn't go back to it's "set point" of 168. This week my goals are to move more and eat controlled portions. Easier said than done! But with the nicer weather I've already spent more time outside this weekend. I can't wait till spring!

I will heighten my resolve to post more often. Maybe I should do a video blog. I can talk a lot faster than I can type. LOL!

Blessings on your week ~ Bekah

Under the Weather...

2009-03-06T09:19:00.003-06:00

This week took an interesting turn for me. My family got exposed to influenza and we were slowly taken down by it, one by one. I was able to hold out the longest and I almost thought that I might be able to avoid getting it. But I woke up Wednesday morning with the chills, and things went downhill from there. The past two days have been miserable! I spent 99% of my day either laying/sitting on the couch or in bed. I am so sick of being inactive! My back side is sore and uncomfortable from sitting for so long. What I used to enjoy (a good excuse to be inactive) now drives me crazy!
Now thankfully, this wasn't the stomach flu, so even though I've had to deal with high temps, headaches, and an achy body, I still have a small appetite. But I get full really fast, so I make sure and eat my favorite stuff first. =) Like last night, I ate my "dessert" of banana, fresh strawberries, and plain yogurt before my salad. It was probably 1/2 the size of what I would normally eat, and I was almost full before I finished. So, I waited a little longer and then ate my salad.

I think often times people view sickness as an excuse to eat whatever they feel like eating, whether it's healthy or not. Especially when your throat hurts, and you just want to live on ice cream, popsicles, and jello! It's tempting to eat your favorite "comfort foods" when you're not feeling good. But the truth is, we need to be eating the most healthy we can while we're sick! How is our body going to recover quickly when we're giving it junk? This blonde can figure that out, y'all.

It was amazing to see the impact that a fever has on our bodies. I can't remember that last time I was this sick (PTL!) and I was never this active before, so I didn't notice such a dramatic difference in my strength and energy levels. On Tuesday, I was on the treadmill for an hour and then downstairs on the Norditrack for 20 minutes. I felt great. But about 15 hours later, I was laying in bed struggling to keep warm and feeling totally weak and helpless. I could barely move. It has made me all the more grateful for the overall healthy life the Lord has blessed me with!

Now, about the weigh in. I had no idea what to expect this week. I was assuming that simply because in the past 2 days I've eaten about 1/2 the amount of food I normally eat, that would produce some weight loss. I had diligently exercised Friday, Saturday, Monday, and Tuesday, so I knew that would help, too. I used a new cardio DVD I purchased for myself on Monday, and it must have worked some different muscles, because I was a little sore on Tuesday!
But, I still had spent two days glued to the couch, which doesn't burn many calories. So, I stepped on this morning assuming there would be maybe 1 to 2 pounds lost. What a shock I got! The scale read 165 - a four pound loss. What do ya know? The best way to lose weight is to get sick, I guess. LOL

So I haven't a clue what next week will bring. I still have to take it slow and not push myself too hard yet. I'm going to go for a short walk and get some fresh air today, but I doubt that I'll be able to do any serious exercise before Monday. That makes me wonder if I'll end up gaining a little weight back as my appetite returns. I've probably only eaten between 900 and 1000 calories the past two days, and that's not enough to keep an active, healthy body fueled. But I'm not stressing about the next week. I'm just enjoying my mind-blowing 4 pound loss today!

Taking it slow and trying to recover ~ Bekah

A Thought About Thoughts...

2009-03-02T13:50:00.006-06:00

"Ho, every one that thirsteth, come ye to the waters, and he that hath no money; come ye, buy, and eat; yea, come, buy wine and milk without money and without price. Wherefore do you spend money for that which is not bread? and your labour for that which satisfieth not? hearken diligently unto me, and eat ye that which is good, and let your soul delight itself in fatness....For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts." Isaiah 55:1,2,8,9

On Saturday evening, as I was finishing up my time on the treadmill, I knew that I needed to spend some time downstairs in the basement as well before calling it quits for that night. I had decided to start things off by doing a little jump roping when I got down there. But when I got downstairs I realized that some things had gotten put in the way of where I usually had room to jump rope, and I was left with a tiny problem - I had no place to jump. What to do, what to do? Well, I'd just have to forget it for that night and come up with a different plan. As I went to put down my jump rope and move on to something else, I got this crazy thought, "What about outside?". There's plenty of room out there, right? Yes, the outdoors are very spacious. But also very cold! However, I decided the fresh, freezing air would only make me jump faster in order to get back inside and jumping faster is a good thing, so before I had time to convince myself of how crazy I was, I grabbed my jump rope and bounded up the stairs and out into the freezing cold. And let me tell you, it was freezing cold! If you would have pulled into our driveway at around 6:00 that evening, you would have seen a once very sweaty and now very frozen Bekah, furiously jumping rope in the middle of our garage like my life depended on it. I did my 200 jumps and bolted back into the warm basement, proud of myself for coming up with a plan "B" and also laughing at how ridiculous I must have looked. And I was thankful. Thankful for my God who has such different thoughts than I.

You see, I know that my flesh did not come up with the idea to go outside in the freezing cold to jump rope. Trust me - my natural man did not enjoy that. =) And all the times that I "hear" thoughts that say, "You can do this! Stick with it. Don't quit now. Keep pushing!" or "You don't need that food. It won't satisfy you. You're not hungry. You've eaten enough. Resist the temptation - flee from it!" - those thoughts don't originate in my sinful body, either. I cannot take credit for them, because they aren't mine. They're God's thoughts, and He's teaching me how to hear them, believe them, and act upon them.

Because I always have the choice. I didn't have to go outside and jump rope. I could have stayed inside and spent a few precious minutes wasting the intensity of my heart rate while I tried to come up with a different plan, simply because I didn't feel like going outside. But I got the crazy thought and went with it! No time for debating or questioning...just do it!

I've found that it's so much easier for me to push myself with exercising as opposed to eating. I can push myself to do just one more rep pretty easily. But ask me to stop eating before my plate is clean, and honey, I'm gonna pick a fight with you! I have to constantly fight the lie that says, "It's healthy, therefore you can eat as much as you want." Wrong! I should be eating until I'm satisfied, whether my plate is clean or not.

Why do you spend money for that which doesn't satisfy? Come to me; I am the Bread of Life and the Living Water. My thoughts aren't your thoughts; and my ways are not your ways. Delight yourself in Me.

How am I ever going to learn to think God's thoughts? How am I going to learn to just follow His ways, whether it seems logical to me or not? (Like jumping rope outside...leaving healthy food on my plate...having peace in spite of a plateau...) The answer is simple - by walking in the Spirit. Back to that again, huh? Yes. Because according to God's Word, the Holy Spirit makes known to us the the thoughts of God.

"For what man knoweth the things of a man, save the spirit of man which is in him? even so the things of God knoweth no man, but the Spirit of God. Now we have received, not the spirit of the world, but the spirit which is of God; that we might know the things that are freely given to us of God...But the natural man receiveth not the things of the Spirit of God; for they are foolishness unto him; neither can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned. But He that is spiritual judgeth all things, yet he himself is judged of no man. For who hath known the mind of the Lord, that he man instruct Him? But we have the mind of Christ." 1 Cor. 2:11, 12, 14, 15, 16

The Holy Spirit, being one of the God-head, knows the thoughts of God. He thinks them, and when I listen to His voice speaking to me and I believe what He says, I'm thinking God's thoughts, too. How amazing is that? He is the still, small voice that encourages me to keep going, keep pressing, keep moving and pushing harder. He is the voice that tells me to flee temptation (namely, chocolate and carbs!) and run to Christ! He is the voice that encourages me to do anything good, anything spiritual, anything that will please my Father in heaven. He is the One speaking those "crazy" thoughts in my head that always seem to go against everything my flesh is feeling.

I've got to learn to think like Someone else. Someone far greater than I. Someone who doesn't struggle with a sinful flesh, but Who took on and crucified my sinful flesh so that I might become the righteousness of God. It's that thought pattern that I must learn to follow. Die to live, resist to overcome, endure to achieve, lose to gain, fall to rise, etc. He is right; those are not my thoughts. Lord, help to listen to your Holy Spirit and simply obey.

Thoughtfully ~ Bekah

Something different!

2009-02-27T19:25:00.002-06:00

Hurray! Hurrah! The scale showed a different number today. I am no longer stuck at 168! After staying the same for weeks on end and wondering if I would ever weigh anything but 168 pounds, I now weigh.........drumroll please............

One pound more. Yep - 169. Can you believe it? What is this body of mine up to? I don't know. But, I've chosen to look on the bright side - now I'll be happy to be back to 168! =)

I really have no regrets from this week. Nothing that I can look back at and say, "I wish I hadn't eaten that" or "I should have pushed myself harder". I got even more creative in my workouts this week. I was trying to think of different ways to do cardio, and one thing that I thought of was rather fun to do. I took about 12 pieces of wood (my family has a whole house woodburner, so we have an abundance of wood in our basement) and I made a "ladder" on the floor. Then I ran the length of the ladder, jumping up and popping my feet in and out of between the pieces of wood, being careful not to touch the wood. I'm sure you've seen people do this. It was great - my heart rate started to soar as I kept going and going, back and forth up and down the ladder. Give it a try! You can use any number of things to make a "ladder". Be creative!

I'm not really discouraged by the scale this week. The Lord is teaching me how to trust in Him alone, not the number that pops up on the scale. Because if I find my happiness and motivation in how much I weigh, I'll never be happy! I'll always be working and straining, pushing myself to meet an unrealistic goal. As long as I keep my focus on doing exactly what the Lord wants me to do, I'm content. The Lord is not trying to frustrate me! I've been growing so much through this period of "stuckness". I'm learning how to keep perservering when I don't see results. I'm learning how to trust the Lord to satisfy my desires. I'm learning to keep my focus on getting fit and healthy and not getting frustrated by the certain parts of my anatomy that don't seem to be dropping their fat deposits! =) So while I wish I could find the key to keep losing weight, I'm taking advantage all the lessons God is teaching me right now. The molding process isn't always easy and fun, but it's so worth it in the end!

Blessings ~ Bekah

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The buddy system...

2009-02-21T16:18:00.003-06:00

I wish I were small. No, I'm not talking about my weight right now - though that's true, too. =) I wish I were a teeny, tiny being that could go inside my body for a peek at what's really going on. Instead of making guesses simply by observing the outside, I wish I could zoom inside and float on a cell through my bloodstream. I want to see what my muscles look like, especially when I'm exercising them. I want to have the opportunity to go watch my fat cells to figure out what exactly I need to do to make them give up their precious storage of......well, fat. =) I want to see how many calories I'm really burning each day and how many I'm taking in. I want the scoop!

Yes, you probably guessed it. Same old, same old number on the scale again. (How many weeks has this been?) I began recording my calories again on Monday, which was helpful. After tracking myself for a few days, I felt pretty confident that I had been doing a good job of sticking to that same calorie range even when I wasn't recording my meals. I felt like I was eating the same amount of food as before, but now I'm doing my best to eat a more balanced meal. Getting my carbs, protein, and fat in the correct amounts. It's a bit of a struggle, because as I've said before - protein is not my favorite thing to eat. I'd much rather spend the calories on carbs! But I know that eating enough protein is a huge part of weight loss. I don't want my body to have a lack of it and resort to burning lean muscle tissue instead! That wouldn't be good. So, I eat my protein. Beans, legumes, nuts, turkey breast (preferably the real thing, not lunch meat), chicken, tuna, eggs, milk, cheese, yogurt, kefir, etc. I try to mix it up to keep from getting bored with my choices. Does anybody have a tasty way you eat your protein? Recipes or suggestions?

I've had several people either come and talk to me or email me recently about reading this blog. Thanks to those of you who've encouraged and prayed for me! And for those of you who have shared your own weight struggles with me, I'm praying for you, too. If there is anything I've learned from keeping this blog it's this: I'm not the only one struggling. I can't even count how many people I've talked to about healthy living/weight loss because of what I've written here. And we need to be doing that! We need to be talking and encouraging one another. We need to be lifting each other up in prayer. We need to be sharing our struggles and needs with those who can keep us accountable! But because of our pride, we all too often keep quiet. That's what I did for years. And look where it got me - obese and extremely unhappy with myself. Don't be foolish like me!

If you are struggling with a specific sin (weight loss or not!) find someone to keep you accountable and cover you in prayer. Preferably someone "older and wiser" in the faith who can give you advice and counsel and who isn't afraid to tell you the truth. In love, of course. =) I'm not saying that you'll never conquer sin if you don't tell someone, but there is something powerful about confessing your sins to each other for the purpose that you can overcome that sin. (Proverbs 28:13, Acts 19:18, Mark 1:5) Confessing to others breaks the secrecy and the feeling that "I'm okay because no one else knows that I struggle with this. I have to make a good impression on everyone else." But would you rather live in secret chains or break free openly? Would you rather live in the fear that someone might find out who you "really are" or live in the freedom that comes when you can put down the mask and serve the Lord knowing that you have no reputation to worry about representing but the Lord's? Then plug your ears when pride is screaming at you, find someone to cover you in prayer and accountability, and by God's grace - break free!

A freed captive ~ Bekah

A Mid-Week Post!

2009-02-18T11:13:00.002-06:00

This post is for those of you who keep giving me grief about only posting once a week. LOL!

The pity party is over, y'all! And I haven't even weighed in yet. =) I just had to spend a little bit of extra time this past week in prayer and the living and active Word to get a spiritual, emotional and physical boost from the Lord. I also have changed a few things after praying and reading through a weight loss book that I recently got. It is designed and written specifically for people trying to lose the last 15-20 pounds ( that's me!). So I grabbed it and started slowly reading through it again. Right after I bought it, I kind of skimmed it and looked at the interesting stuff. But now is no time for skimming! I need some answers.

I took a long quiz and found out that my metabolic type is a "balanced oxidizer", which in layman's terms means that my body needs an equal amount of carbohydrates, protein, and fat at each meal and that I have the capacity to do well on the widest variety of foods. Just as I suspected. My sister Rachel and I were having a discussion about this a few weeks ago. She is most definitely a "fast oxidizer" which means she needs more fats and proteins than carbs with each meal. She described herself by saying, "I HAVE to eat some kind of protein with each meal. You can do just fine with a salad, slice of bread, and a piece of fruit. But I need some kind of meat to keep me going." And it's true - we're all different. I needed to figure out exactly how to fuel my body properly, because I think I've gotten a little off track of what my body really needs.

I also calculated my BMR again, (basal metabolic rate - the number of calories my body needs in order to function at it's most basic levels) just to be sure. At the Mercy Fitness Center their test put me at 1,600 calories. And what do you know? It was the same when I re-crunched the numbers. What this means is that my calorie allowance for each day is 1,600. If I eat that amount, it's enough to keep my body going strong and the extra calories I burn through exercising will cause weight loss. That's actually more than I think I've been eating. I began recording my meals again on Monday and keeping the calories balanced at every meal - 40% carbs, 30% protein, and 30% fat. I quickly realized that I was under-eating in the carb and protein department. In some respects, eating more calorie-dense foods goes against what my brain is telling me. You'd think that eating less food would be better. But it's not! It's never right to deprive your body of the fuel it needs, whether my brain thinks so or not. The approach of eating less might be okay, if I wasn't exercising 6 hours a week. But I think I've been lax on giving myself the proper mixture of fuel, and that is going to change.

So, with these little changes we'll see what the scale says this week. I'm not expecting a miracle after only a few days of change, but I'm curious to see what the next month turns out like. I contacted a local fitness center in Monticello to see if they offer any classes. I don't have time to be driving to a gym every day, but I thought it might be fun to take a kick-boxing class or something. Something different to get some different muscles moving! On Tuesday, I was on the treadmill for an hour and it felt good. I did interval training and went almost 5 miles, which was pretty good for me! Today I did Levels 2 and 3 on my workout DVD back to back. That was tough. My body did not want to cooperate as I got closer to the end! I really had to focus (especially on my breathing - it's amazing how much breathing properly during exercising helps!) and I pushed myself hard. I made it through with only a few 5 second breaks, and now I just have to wean myself away from those. Progress comes when you push!

Holding onto Jesus ~Bekah

Some pictures...

2009-02-14T20:36:00.005-06:00

Getting ready to exercise this morning. I made Hannah take a few shots of me.

Yes, this is the proof. I actually did a push-up!!!

The pig tails were fun. I wanted to get pumped about exercising, and having goofy hair was a simple way to relax, smile, and get movin'!

Heart ramblings...

2009-02-12T11:49:00.004-06:00

Consistency. A good quality, right? We think highly of people who are consistent in life; they're dependable and disciplined. You can count on them to do what they say, because they've proven themselves in the past by their consistency. Yes, consistency is a good thing except...

...when it comes to the scale. Yep, you guessed it. Another week stuck at 168lbs. There seems to be an invisible brick wall in front of me, forcing my body to stay...consistent. And it seems that no matter what I do I can't break through this wall. It's confusing and frustrating, to say the least. When you're trying to lose weight, there's nothing more disheartening than stepping on the scale and seeing the same number as the previous week. It's like I worked a whole week for nothing! It stinks, because I'm doing the work and putting in the time and something isn't working. I'm doing something wrong; I just don't know what. Losing weight shouldn't be this hard. I shouldn't be stuck at the same weight since last July, give or take a pound. I must be doing something counter-productive.

It just doesn't add up. I've physically grown a lot stronger since last summer. I'm doing things now that were way beyond my level back then. I've pushed myself in so many areas and have changed a lot of things for the better since then. But the scale isn't showing that. And the hypothesis that "I must be gaining muscle" is growing quite flimsy now. I'm not gaining that much muscle, people! =) And muscle gained means more calories burned which means more weight loss. So that's where the theory falls apart.

I wish weight loss was a simple math formula. You know? "A" plus "B" will equal "C" every time. No guessing about it. If I (A) exercise and (B) eat healthy I will always get (C) weight loss. But, that's not how it works.

I'm running out of ideas. I thought that maybe if I dramatically cut my carb intake this past week that it might jolt me to hop back on track. I had carbs for breakfast only, which left me eating lots of salad and fruit throughout the rest of the day. Yes, even more than usual! Nice thought, but cutting the carbs didn't work. And I can't live like that anyway, so I'm secretly kind of glad. lol

My mom and I had a talk about this last night. We're stumped. (This is where a personal trainer would come in handy!) Mom's only thought was that I must be exercising too hard. (Sound familiar?) But I don't see how that could possibly be. Maybe I need to switch things up even more than I've already attempted to do, in regard to exercising. Am I too used to what I'm doing? I don't do the same thing every day, or even every week, so I don't know how that would help. *sigh*

I didn't mean for this post to be such a downer. I'm not throwing in the towel! I'm just honestly frustrated and confused. I'm tired of trying different things and seeing no results. I want answers! I want to keep moving forward! I want to reach my goal. I want to figure out the problem and do what it takes to fix it. I just don't know what my problem is - and it's driving me crazy!

But, God is good. And even if Bekah May is stuck at 168lbs for the rest of her life, God is still good. He is still worthy of praise and glory. He is still my King and I am still His child. He is still my Living Water and my Bread of Life. He is still the One I'm living for. No matter what.

I'm stuck, but I'm not surrendering to failure and defeat ~ Bekah

Sledding, sweating, and a split

2009-02-07T15:54:00.003-06:00

Have you been outside yet? Today the weather was absolutely gorgeous and totally out of place, considering it's the beginning of February. My mom and I took my two younger sisters sledding this afternoon. We hadn't gone yet this year, and we were looking for something to do outdoors, so sledding seemed like a good choice. We were just hoping that all the snow hadn't melted on the sledding hill!

When we arrived at the park, not only was there enough snow, there was also enough room. We were the only ones there! Avalon and Bethany were excited to get going, so we got our snowsuits on as fast as we could (which was a little difficult for me - I was trying to squeeze into a medium size set of snowpants!) and headed to the top of the hill. (I actually got them to zip!)

Now, I must tell you that this was the first year of my life that I was actually okay with going sledding. In the past, I dreaded it. Not because I didn't like sledding as a whole. I did. But I hated climbing back up the hill. I really didn't think it was worth it to hike all the way back up to the top only to slide back down for maybe 15 seconds! Too much work, I thought. So I avoided it. I used to stay in the lodge with the mothers when we'd get together with other families and to go sledding. Or, maybe I'd go out for a bit, get really tired, and come back in complaining that it was "too cold".

But not today! I was running up and down the hill and enjoying the fact that I wasn't getting tired. Bethany is too little to carry her sled back up the hill, so often time I would follow her sled down the hill, haul it back up with her, put her back on, and do the same thing over again. And it was fun! We had a nice, active afternoon. Just perfect for a day like this!

This past week was encouraging. I had a few conversations with other ladies about this whole battle with living healthy lives and the struggles that we all seem to face, in one way or another. One friend has battled with her weight for years, yo-yoing back in forth in her weight loss attempts. Another friend is just looking to drop a few pounds and tone her muscles. One mother I talked to has been trusting the Lord to help her curb her sugar cravings and has dramatically altered her daily diet in order to consume more raw foods. We're all doing our best to listen to our Lord and do what He is asking each of us to do!

And right now, the Lord is asking me to just stay faithful. I weighed in the same this week - 168 pounds. As one of my best friends said it," At least you didn't gain!". Yes, that's true. I didn't gain...but I didn't lose, either! My body seems to be getting comfy right here, and I'm going to do my best to give it a good kick in the rear this week. =) I ran 3 miles on the treadmill this morning (which is something I'd never done before!) and followed that up by 20 minutes on the Norditrack. It felt really good! And the sledding this afternoon was fun, too. Exercising doesn't have to be a drag. Find something active you like to do (or at least, don't mind doing) and get to it!

I know this may shock some of you, but last night I decided on my cheat item for the week. I was wanting something with chocolate, but also something a little salty. Or maybe a little fruity, too. Hmmm...what comes to your mind that is chocolatey, salty, and fruity? Well, I'll tell you what popped into my head - a banana split. Yep! It sounded really good! So, I had one. Now, mind you - I did limit it to one scoop of ice cream, half of a banana, 2 tsp of chocolate syrup, and 3 tbsp of peanuts. (Oh, and I had a few peanut M&M's, too.)Yummy! It really hit the spot, but I was totally satisfied when finished and ready to set aside that kind of eating till next week. Small doses make things so much more enjoyable!

Continuing in His grace ~ Bekah

Teaching at Bright Lights

2009-02-03T11:04:00.007-06:00

Last night, I had an awesome time teaching and sharing at Bright Lights. (For those of you who aren't familiar with Bright Lights, it's a discipleship program for young girls that was started over 11 years ago by my dear friend, Sarah Mally. I've been involved with Bright Lights for over 10 years, and all of my sisters are a part of the group at well. You can find out more about it at http://www.brightlights.info/) Sarah had asked me to share my weight loss testimony with the girls, along with some of the spiritual principles the Lord has been teaching me as I've been on this journey.

So at the meeting last night, I spent an hour telling the girls about how the Lord set this captive free! It was a little difficult planning a message to share to a group of girls that didn't necessarily need to lose weight, as that is such a huge part of my testimony - I could talk about that for hours! So I asked the Lord to give me wisdom on how to speak to both audiences, and address things that everyone struggles with, no matter what your size. I was encouraged as He gave me the words to speak, because I didn't have as much time to prepare as I was hoping for. It was another opportunity for me to practice following the lead of the Holy Spirit! We had great fun, the girls were very enthusiastic and responsive, and I'd love to do it again. :-) More later ~Bekah

What's a stuck girl to do?

2009-01-31T20:18:00.002-06:00

Living risky. At least, I felt like that this past week. My mom and I did a little talking, and we spent some time bouncing ideas off of each other as to what I can do to break through this same plateau. I've read tons of weight loss books, and they all have different books ideas. Eat this, don't eat this, exercise this way, exercise this long, but don't exercise too much... It's enough to make my head spin!

My mom has felt for a long time that I'm exercising too hard. I don't really feel like it, because I'm only doing six to eight hours a week, and if anything I feel like I should be doing more! But I'm thinking that maybe my body has gotten into an exercise rut, so I've been mixing things up every day. I spent less time on the treadmill and more time doing other cardio, like step-ups on a stool, jumping jacks, high knees, and squat boxing to name a few. It's been fun doing things differently. I don't get bored, because by the time I get tired of doing one thing I have to move on to the next.

I've spent some time reading through past journal entries and blog posts, looking for any clues that might help me figure out what I need to do to continue losing. I specifically looked at the weeks where I lost 2 pounds or had a weight loss that I wasn't expecting, and I was surprised to see a common thread between those weeks. Oddly enough, it seems that the weeks that I lost the most weight were the weeks that I missed at least one day of exercising. Weird, huh? I never would have guessed that. How in the world does missing a day of exercising result in weight loss? Maybe Mom was right. Could I be exercising too hard and not eating enough calories, so then my body kicks into "starvation mode" and starts hording my fat? I didn't know, but I decided to give this theory a try this week. One day, instead of totally skipping exercise (because I really do feel SO good after doing it) I just made it a lot easier. I walked for awhile, did a few minutes of stair steps, and then walked for a little more. It was about 20-30 minutes, and I barely broke a sweat. But I was curious to see if it would make a difference.

The scale didn't reflect that this week; I stayed at 168lbs, but I think I'm going to give it a try again this week and see what happens. I mean, what's the worst thing that can happen? Weight gain? Yeah, well. I know what to do to fix that problem. I'm just trying to get out of this silly "maintaining" mode and into the "losing" mode again.

I spent time doing interval training on the treadmill today, and I was so hot and breathless once I finally finished. (Here's what I did - 3 minutes of warmup, 1 minute at 3-4mhp, 3 minutes at 5mph, 1 minute at 3-4 mph, 3 minutes at 6 mph, 1 minute at 3-4pmh, 3 minutes at 7mph, 1 minute at 3-4mph, 3 minutes at 8mph, and 3 minutes of cooldown.) My, oh my! When I was running at 8mph, I felt like my feet were flying out from under me. My heart rate sky-rocketed and I was gasping for air as I told myself, "Keep going! You can do this!". I held on to it as long as possible, and I'm going to have to work up to the whole 3 minutes. It was tough! But I'll get it one of these days...

And I've been on a salsa kick lately, so most of my salads have a tex-mex twist to them. Black beans, corn, green pepper, onions, lettuce, salsa...yum-o!

We had a crazy day in town and I'm exhausted, so I'm off to bed. Sweet dreams everyone! ~Bekah

Not discouraged...

2009-01-24T17:08:00.003-06:00

Remember how I said that I might have to just "get over" whatever number came up on the scale? Well, I kinda did this morning. I weighed in at 168lbs -up two pounds from last week. Now, I don't believe that I gained two pounds of fat simply because I ate too much on one day! I'm sure that the extra calories contributed to this slight gain, but I'm hoping that I'm also gaining some muscle weight, because I've been doing all of these muscle strengthening exercises for the past few weeks.

It's never fun to see a gain on the scale. It's hard to stand there and see the number and not feel discouraged. That's when I have the hardest time refuting thoughts that start circling in my head. You gained weight. Gained, not lost. You worked so hard last week and this is what you get? Remember how many mornings you crawled out of bed earlier than usual and exercised? Is it really worth it? How long is this going to take you? Do you really want to be fighting and struggling for the rest of your life?...What are people going to think of you? So much for your testimony...you can't seem to lose these last few pounds!

Doubts. Fears. Discouragement. Frustration. Regret. Those feelings all seem to come to the surface on the weigh in days that are less than what I'd hoped for. Sometimes I feel like banging my head against the wall and shouting, "What am I doing wrong? Why isn't this working? Am I ever going to reach my goal?".

But the Lord has been so faithful to teach me that life isn't all about my weight! And there is such freedom that comes when you transfer that knowledge from your head to your heart, when you truly believe it. The world will not come to a screeching halt simply because the scale was not my friend this week. (Aren't you all happy about that?) God's love will not change; I'm not any less of His child because I didn't lose weight. I will continue exercising and eating healthy for the rest of my life, whether I lose another pound or not. And that's because the Lord has changed my mind and my way of thinking, and He is continuing to change me. Transformation is a process. Caterpillars don't become butterflys overnight, and I certainly can't change overnight either. Neither can you! (So nice to know we're all in the same boat, huh?) I thought one way for eighteen years before Jesus got my attention and pointed out how wrong I was, so we both knew this wasn't going to be a sprint to the finish line - it's more like a jog, or a walk, or sometimes a crawl. :-)

Anyway, I'm enjoying the journey. I mean, I can't really struggle with pride if I keep gaining weight, ya know. (Ha!) I had a great time with Jesus while on the treadmill this morning, and I know some of you can't understand this, but I was jogging and running and walking on there for almost an hour and it was fun! I didn't want to stop. It was great!

So my mindset today is this: If I'm having fun exercising and I'm enjoying my healthy food - who cares what the dumb scale says? I'd rather be happy while making healthy choices for my body but occasionally having "hiccups" in my weight than feeling grumpy and deprived while following some bogus and not-so-healthy-diet yet losing weight (which is usually water or lean tissue weight, not fat weight). Make sense?

Rejoice in the Lord always (no matter what your scale says) and again I say, "Rejoice!" ~Bekah

Pictures and confessions...

2009-01-19T13:25:00.005-06:00

More pictures for all of my visual friends! Hannah and Leah have heard me sing the praises of this exercise DVD for the past few weeks, and they've decided to join in with me. We started with Level One, which was enough. I was happy to see that by pushing through the BURN, I've made progress. I did my treadmill time this morning, followed by the Level Two workout, ate breakfast, and then did Level One with the girls an hour later. And I found Level One to be fairly easy. When you are consistent - you will see progress!

As you can see, there is nothing glamorous about exercising. You mess up your hair and get all sweaty. In the past, I hated to have anyone see me while I was in this state. It's not exactly cute, ya know. I would cringe when a family member walked in on my workout time. I didn't want them to see my huffing and puffing on the treadmill or groaning while doing a strength move. It somehow seemed like they were peeking in on a private moment - I wasn't looking the best and I didn't want them to see me struggling to keep up the pace. Boiled down, it was a pride issue. And we all know how our Lord feels about pride, even in such a small area. With His help, I got over it. How? By welcoming the very thing that used to annoy me! I left the door to the laundry room slightly open; I would work out in the living room, even if I could do it somewhere else. I had Leah help me do situps (gotta hold my feet!) and Hannah would keep time for me while I did other exercises. My attitude now is, "I don't care! Look all you want! I feel great, and I'm not stopping because you're staring!". And now, my sisters have caught the exercise bug. Sweet! For those of you who are scared for anyone to see you without your hair and makeup done - get over it! Suck it up and start living in FREEDOM.

And now that I've finished pushing you out of your comfort zone, it's time for a confession. Yep, here it comes - the dirt on Bekah! I did an awful job of listening to the Spirit on Friday, and I consumed way too many calories. Dumb calories, too. I ate even when I wasn't hungry and I didn't stop till I was stuffed. Going to bed that night, about the only thing in my body that was happy were my taste buds. My stomach was churning, my throat was scratchy, and my heart was guilty. I laid there in bed beating myself up; the devil didn't need to say a thing, I was doing pretty well coming up with lies to believe on my own. I felt awful, like I was such a failure - wondering if I'll ever really be able to conquer my flesh and be victorious. (You get the picture...) Can anybody relate to this? :-)

It was a mistake; I sinned. That was obvious. And I was left with a few choices concerning what to do next. Should I dwell on my sin and strive on my own strength to try and make it all better by denying myself certain foods and exercising over-abundantly? Should I throw in the towel, and forget this whole "weight loss thing" for good? Or should I confess, repent, and move on - continuing the fight?

By God's grace, I chose option number 3. I spent time in confession, and the Lord was so faithful to show me why I had such a rough day. I have a few things to work through, but now they are in the light - I can see them, and He's helping me to overcome them. So, I'm moving on. I'm kind of scared to weigh in this Friday, but I need to take responsibility for my own dumb choices. I will be posting about the number that comes on the scale - whatever it is - and I'll just have to "get over it"!

Smiling because of Him ~ Bekah

Weigh in...

2009-01-16T13:19:00.002-06:00

Another weigh in day. How does the week go by so quickly? Didn't I just weight in?

I got up this morning and jumped on the treadmill for 30 minutes. Then I moved on to my "killer workout" DVD. I'm slowly getting stronger; my poor arms are experiencing major burning sensations every morning. But it will be worth it! That's what I have to keep telling myself. I sometimes have to take a 5 second break when performing arm exercises, but I'm pushing myself to not give in too easily. There's burning muscles, and then there's BURNING MUSCLES!!! And I'm trying to push past the "regular" burning and hang in as long as possible in order to put pressure on my muscles to force them to change and grow. Easier said than done!

Anyway, my number for this week is....166. That's a pound less than last week! Woohoo! I'm happy with that, especially since I'm doing my best to gain muscle right now, which might interfere with actual weight loss.

I met with a friend at Panera's last night (namely, Chrissy!) and had a yummy salad. Do you know how hard it is to go to Panera and not eat at least one cinnamon crunch bagel with lots of hazelnut cream cheese and wash it all down with an iced mocha? Well, let me tell you - it's pretty hard! But I didn't want to do anything dumb and screw up my weigh in this morning. So, I just waited till after my weigh in and had half a bagel with gobs of cream cheese this morning! Nothing like a yummy bagel for my cheat item this week. :-)

Even though it's super cold outside - that's no excuse to not do any kind of exercise throughout the day. There are millions of simple exercises you can do! Instead of walking to the kitchen, do lunges to get there. Run up the stairs instead of walking. Squat down to put clothes in the dryer instead of bending your back. Feeling cold? Before you run to the closet and grab a sweater, do some jumping jacks. You'll start feeling warmer in no time! All these simple things will add up to you feeling stronger and more energetic.

Stay warm! ~Bekah

A little humor...

2009-01-14T16:12:00.004-06:00

I thought I'd begin this post with a little humor. :-) As I have been reading through "Perfect Weight America", I came across this funny section called the Dieter's Psalm. It made me laugh, so I thought I'd share it with you all! (It's based on Psalm 23.)

Strict is my diet. I must not want.
It maketh me to lie down at night hungry.
It leadeth me past the confectioners.
It trieth my willpower.
It leadeth me in the paths of alteration for my figure's sake.
Yea, though I walk through the aisles of the pastry department,
I will buy no sweet rolls, for they are fattening.
The cakes and the pies, they tempt me.
Before me is a table set with green beans and lettuce.
I filleth my stomach with liquids,
My day's quota runneth over.
Surely calorie and weight charts will follow me all the days of my life,
And I will dwell in the fear of scales forever.

The reason I found that to be so funny is because there is a thread of truth weaving through the whole "psalm". If you've ever been on a diet before, I'm sure you can relate to a lot of the things mentioned! I can relate to the temptation of the sweets. I have come to realize that I will always have a sweet tooth; that I cannot change. But I do have control over what kind of sweets I crave. Right now, fresh fruit is my favorite dessert. Oh, and honey. I've been known to head for the honey jar when I feel a sweet craving coming on! I drizzle some on my finger and suck on it for awhile. (If you try this, just make sure you don't use your thumb. You may get some strange looks.)
Does that mean I don't ever have a hankering for chocolate? No, I still have to fight those, too. And if chocolate has been something that I've wanted all week, then I'll make sure and have a little bit as my "cheat item" so that I don't keep feeling deprived.

So while I can relate to some of the struggles mentioned above, I'm also very thankful for all of the things that I can't relate to. I don't consider my diet to be strict, even though I think some people might disagree with me. :-) I eat a huge variety of foods, and the things I don't eat are either too high in calories for me, too processed and nutrient-deficit, or I just don't like them in the first place.

And the Lord has delivered me so I will not "dwell in the fear of scales forever". Sure, I hate seeing that I've gained weight - who would like seeing that? But I understand that my weight will fluctuate and so I can't look to the scale to find my happiness or my security. Praise the Lord for His freedom! In fact, I'm actually expecting my weight to stay the same for a little longer while I build more muscle as I'm following this DVD program. At least, that's what they've told me to expect. I can tell that I'm getting stronger and I'm eating healthy - that's really all I care about. I know that my weight will eventually reflect that!

I've heightened my physical activity again and moved up to Level 2 on my DVD. It's killing me! I've realized how weak some of my arm muscles are as I've been doing the exercises - it burns bad! Oh, I just lay on the floor panting after finishing. My arms/legs are burning and my heart is pounding...it's great. I feel SO good afterward! I've also increased my running speed as I've gotten more fit, because it takes more effort to get my heart rate up. Hurray for slow progress! I think it would be super fun to do this with a group of girls. We'd all benefit from it!

Continue making right choices everyone! ~Bekah

2009-01-08T16:57:00.002-06:00

This past week has been pretty interesting around our house. I began reading through Jordan Rubin's book, "Perfect Weight America" in November (and I'm almost finished with it - aren't you proud of me?) and I decided that after the New Year I was going to try a few of his ideas. In the book, Jordan recommends taking part in a cleanse 4 times a year - the first cleanse being in January. So, I thought this was perfect timing and I enthusiastically shared this information with my family. The purpose of the cleanse is to rid your body of toxic build up that accumulates over the months because of junk we eat and toxins that we absorb from the air, cosmetic products, etc. I thought that this 10 day cleanse sounded like a good idea, and after discussing it with my family, we decided that last Monday (the 5th) would be a good day to start.

Hannah was on board with me and we have been "cleansing buddies" for the week. Leah is also in a "cleanse" of sorts, as she is cutting dairy out of her diet for 10 days. Her acne always flairs up when she consumes too much dairy, so she's taking a break from it. My mom is doing her best to cut out sugar from her diet, and Rachel and my dad.......are cheering us on from the sidelines! (To his credit, my dad has eaten soup with Hannah and I along with salad for dinner, and he wishes that his daily schedule would allow him to take part in a cleanse.)

The cleanse goes something like this: Day 1 - eat homemade chicken soup for all five meals. Days 2-4, eat chicken soup for 4 meals and have a salad with homemade dressing for dinner. Days 5-7, you can add nuts and seeds to your dinner salad. Days 8-10, you can eat 4 ounces of kefir or full-fat plain yogurt with a teaspoon of honey along with everything else. So you'll notice - no carbohydrates, no fruits and virtually no sweets. While I knew this was going to be tough, I was preparing myself mentally for the cravings and asking the Lord to give me His strength to see this through.

Well, let's just say we've had a few bumps in the road. First off, I didn't plan on the time it takes to make the huge pot of chicken soup (not chicken noodle, chicken soup). We went to HyVee the night before our cleanse to grab a few items we needed, and it was so late by the time we got home that I decided to just make the soup in the morning. Bad idea. As you probably know, making chicken soup is not a quick thing. It took us almost the entire day! Okay, plan B. I ate fruit for breakfast and had some of the broth for lunch. And then, it hit me.

Nausea. I felt awful! My stomach was really upset, but I didn't know if I should tell my family or not. I mean, here it is - the very first day of our cleanse and I'm feeling sick! Not the best advertisement for healthy living! It finally got so bad that I told my mom I needed to go lay down for a bit, and by late afternoon I was feeling much better again. I still don't know why I felt so awful. I've fasted before and not had any nausea, so it's still a mystery to me. I didn't have much of an appetite that day, so no struggles with cravings. And even though we didn't exactly start the cleanse according to the book, I was sure that the next day would be much better!

I got up the next morning, exercised, and then headed to the kitchen for breakfast. Where I came to the conclusion - I don't care what the book says, this girl ain't eating soup for breakfast! Sorry! Not happening. I had a piece of fruit again and talked with Hannah about it, and we decided to go ahead and eat fruit throughout our cleanse. We were going to take part in the "winter cleanse", which doesn't include fruit, but the "summer cleanse" does. So, we put on shorts and flip-flops, dabbed some suntan lotion on our skin and ate our fruit! j/k

Okay, I can do this. Fruit, chicken soup, salad...how hard can it be? Famous last words. This is tough! And on top of that, I'm still not feeling good. I've had a sore throat and dry cough for about 3 days now, and my head sometimes feels full of pressure. (I highly doubt that this has anything to do with the cleanse, though. If anything, being on this cleanse should help me recover faster!) Oh, and Hannah isn't feeling good, either. Nothing specific for her, she just has a case of the "blahs". Perfect. WHAT'S UP WITH THAT? Is it because the toxins are being released from our fat cells and are in our bloodstream while on their way out? Is it because we're having carb and sugar withdrawal? Probably. No one ever said that cleansing would be fun...

The past few days have been very stretching for both Hannah and I, and tonight we looked across the table at one another and made a mutual decision without even speaking. (It's a sister thing!) We made it 5 days, and beginning tomorrow we're going to slowly begin adding the carbs, dairy, and sugar back into our diets. I could look at this and say that we're bailing out early and beat myself up about it, but I'm proud of the fact that we lasted so long. If five days doesn't seem long to you, then YOU try it! But just make sure you know exactly what you're getting into. :-) I was glad that we were able to give our bodies a little break.

Okay, okay. The weigh in this morning. I really had no idea what to expect, but I was thinking there might be a slight gain. I couldn't exercise nearly as hard this week because I didn't have the energy, and I was so sick yesterday that I didn't do any at all. My thoughts were justified when I saw 167lbs this morning, which is up a pound from last week. Not really stressing out - this has been such an odd week! I'm going to double my efforts this next week and see what magic number I can pull! :-) And I'm going to begin counting my calories again for this week just to make sure I'm eating enough, but not too much.

That's all from here! Wishing I had more time to blog. I'll try and add some more thoughts as this week continues. ~Bekah

Happy New Year!

2009-01-02T11:13:00.012-06:00

This past week has been pretty fun. My two youngest sisters have decided that my workout DVD is really exciting, so they've been joining me in the different exercises. Our living room isn't quite big enough for us to all do it together, so they sit on the couch and watch me until I've finished, and then I start over again and do a few minutes with them. It's pretty funny watching them proudly lift their 2 and 3 pound weights over their heads! I'm impressed with how well they watch and imitate the people on the TV screen. Here are a few pictures of us (after I've showered and changed clothes!) doing our exercises together:

This morning I stepped on the scale and it read 166lbs, which is up a pound from last week. I'm not really concerned about it, though. I'm hoping that by doing the exercise DVD - in addition to my time on the treadmill - I'll be adding some muscle weight to my frame. I can tell that I'm getting stronger, and I'm able to keep up with the DVD a lot better than on day one. I can also tell that I've lost some inches this past week or so, even though not many pounds.

A friend who had lost a lot of weight a few years ago gave me some clothes last summer, because she unfortunately has gained a lot of the weight back and her "skinny" clothes don't fit anymore. There were several pairs of jeans, so I threw them into a winter clothes bucket and took them up to the attic. I decided to go hunting through our attic last week to try and find that bucket, and I brought it down and tried some of the jeans on. This summer, I had barely gotten them to zip. (Do you know what "spray on jeans" look like? lol) But now, I've been wearing them all week! They are a size 14, and some of them are even too big. I love tangible progress!

Can you believe that it's a New Year? I'm excited, especially as I keep inching closer and closer to meeting my goal. Have you made any goals for this coming year? I kind of wonder how many people make goals anymore, because it seems like all we hear about are the failures. We don't often hear about the people who actually do the work required to meet their goals. We just hear the statistics that send the message, "You can make goals if you want, but the odds are you'll give up and fail."

Let's be different! Let's break through the plateau of starting out strong, hitting an obstacle, being overwhelmed, and giving up. I challenge you to make goals - realistically, hard, challenging, you-will-grow-through-this goals. Pray for wisdom and strength and then do it! Just do it! No excuses, no pity-parties. If you want to achieve something great, you must give all of your energy to accomplishing it. You can't just give 50%. That's no good! Taking the easy road never gets you where you really want to go. Push.....HARD!

Walking the narrow road with you ~ Bekah

A Christmas Present from Jesus...

2008-12-26T09:21:00.004-06:00

I'm hoping that you all had an awesome day with your family and friends while celebrating the birth of our Lord! We've had a busy week, made complete with the adoption of Bethany Avianna in our family on Christmas Eve morning. It was a great way to start our Christmas holiday! We had a special time at the courthouse as we explained to the judge exactly why we wanted to adopt Bethany, (here's where the tears started to flow, y'all!) and even though I don't think her two-year-old mind understood everything, we'll all remember this Christmas Eve day when we got the best present we could ever ask for!

We ended up going out to eat twice on the 24th because of the plans we made for the day. And if you're like me, eating out while trying to lose weight used to make me panic. Eating out scared me because it seemed like my meal was out of my control - I didn't know what they would offer and if they would have semi-decent healthy choices. So, I've learned a few tricks to help me eat smart when we do go out.
-Eat a small snack before you go out. Don't arrive at a restaurant feeling famished!
-Order water - don't drink your calories!
-No appetizers. They are only added calories that you really don't need, especially since you aren't famished. Most appetizers are either fried or dripping in sugary sauces, so do your body a favor and skip them.
-Think lean protein and vegetables. Veggies should cover at least 1/2 of your plate - either fresh or steamed. I order a salad 95% of the time, sometimes with chicken on top. Also, always ask them to serve the dressing on the side. Most restaurants dump WAY too much dressing onto the salads. We went to Olive Garden recently, and if you've been there you know that they serve bread sticks and salad before your main course arrives. I skipped the bread sticks, and asked that they bring me a plate of salad with the dressing on the side. (I didn't want to eat the premixed salad they bring in large bowls to the table, because it's oozing with dressing.) They were very accommodating and I got exactly what I wanted. Don't feel like making special requests is a pain or a nuisnace! They're job is to wait on you, ya know. :-)
-If you want pasta, look for the whole wheat. Several restaurants are now offering whole wheat pasta! And stick to a marinara sauce instead of the creamy (and full of fat!) alfredo. The same rule applies to soups. You want to eat tomato based soups not the milky, cheesy kinds.
-Avoid desserts. I know, I know. The pictures look so yummy, right? But unless this is a special occasion, you really don't need it. If you've got a hankering for something sweet, order a bowl of fresh fruit. It will satisfy your sweet tooth, and you won't leave feeling stuffed and sluggish.

So, my plan for this week was kind of shaken up a little. I had already planned to weigh in a day early because of Christmas, and then the day before the weigh in I couldn't exercise and we went out to eat twice. Not the best scenario for weight loss, but I didn't have much of a choice in the matter. So, I stepped on the scale on Thursday morning and braced myself for the worst. Only to be surprised! I lost two pounds last week. Don't ask me how - I still haven't figured it out! I was so shocked and eliated to see that I'm down to 165lbs. I'm thinking that was a present from the Lord! Hurray!

My family was so sweet and got me some great presents! My parents bought me a nice exercise mat (the hardwood floor gets pretty hard) and they also got me an exercise DVD. Remember how I used to think that exercise DVDs were for people who didn't know what they were doing? Well, I've changed my mind. I was excited to do a workout with the DVD, so this morning I popped it in our DVD player after doing my cardio on the treadmill. It was actually really fun! I did pretty well with the cardio and abdominal workout, but the strength training was a little bit of a challenge - which is what I suspected. But I was actually able to keep up through the 20 minute workout, even though I'd just spent 30 minutes on the treadmill, so I was happy. Progress is being made! Now I have a program that can help me grow stronger in the areas where I'm weakest, so I'm hoping to add more muscle weight to my frame in the next few weeks. :-)
My mom also bought me a gift card to HyVee so I can buy specialty items from their Health Market. Hurray! Some of those things are so expensive...

I'm also excited because in the next few weeks we are going to be fixing me a spot in our basement that will serve as my personal gym. I'll be able to move out of our cramped laundry room and have all of my weights and exercise machines in one place - not scattered all over the house! Can't wait.

Blessings to you all! ~Bekah

P.S. I've put some pictures from the adoption down below:

Psalm 18

2008-12-18T19:08:00.002-06:00

I was reading through the psalm of the day today, which was a familiar passage. I love this psalm! I picked a few verses from that chapter and wrote them on my brightly colored card stock that I stare at every morning on the treadmill. I've read through them countless times the past few months as I whiz along, but the Lord revealed something new to me today as I was reading through the whole chapter. I'm sure this has happened to you before, too. Every so often a passage of Scripture that you've known for years suddenly hits you between the eyes and a "light bulb" goes off in your head.

It's a fairly long chapter, so I'll try and summarize it for you. (Then, go read it for yourself!) David begins the psalm by praising the Lord. He affirms his trust in the Lord by calling Him "my rock and my fortress; my deliverer...in whom will I trust". A few verses later, David writes that he called to the Lord and was answered; He cried and his cry reached God's throne. Then David uses vivid imagery to describe how the Lord answered and proved Himself strong on David's behalf. The Lord "rode upon the cherub", He "thundered in the heavens", and "the Highest gave his voice". David said that the Lord drew him out of many waters and delivered him from his strong enemy "for they were too strong for me".

In verse 19, David says that he was delivered because the Lord delighted in him, and the reason the Lord was delighted in him is because "I have kept the ways of the Lord" and "I was also upright before him, and kept myself from mine iniquity."

And what caught my eye today was the switch that occurs in verse 28. David changes from telling of all the Lord's acts of deliverance and begins to tell what the Lord has done in his life, how He was strengthening David. Because of the Lord, David had run through a troop and had leaped over a wall. David writes, "It is God that girdeth me with strength, and maketh my way perfect. He maketh my feet like hinds feet, and setteth me upon my high places. He teacheth my hands to war, so that a bow of steel is broken by mine arms. Thou hast given me the shield of thy salvation: and thy right hand hath holden me up, and thy gentleness hath made me great. I have pursued mine enemies, and overtaken them: neither did I turn again till they were consumed. I have wounded them that they were not able to rise: they are fallen under my feet. " I could go on, but I'll stop now. :-)

Here's what I was thinking about this passage. I was struck by the fact that the Lord was teaching David to be a warrior. He was teaching David how to stand up and fight on his own! I think often in my life I find myself shoving my battles up to the Lord in prayer and asking Him to do all the work for me. Just deliver me, Lord! That's all I'm asking. Thunder in the heavens, shake the mountains! Let the hail fall and the fire roar. I'll just sit here and wait for you to finish fighting.
But, that's not what the Lord wants! Just like David, He is in the process of training me so that I can fight my own battles in His strength. I want to leap over walls! I want to have arms that can break steel! I want to pursue my enemies and have them fall under my feet! Don't you? I don't want to be a weak and defeated Christian. I don't want to be constantly asking the Lord for victory while I sit around doing nothing. I want to know how to outsmart my enemies! I want to learn His strategies for victory. I want to be a "warrior in training" in the Lord's army.

I find it fascinating that the Lord wants to teach us. He wants us to fight. He wants us to become mighty in His Spirit. He wants us to walk in the victory that He paid His life for!
Because He could just take care of everything for us. It's so much easier for parents to work alone without having their little children "helping", isn't it? But He finds joy in our feeble offerings for help, just as earthly parents do. And He knows that we won't learn anything without actually doing. There is a time for us to step out and take action! We don't grow without working. We can't learn how to fight by just watching. We must engage in a fight ourselves! We must work our physical muscles to achieve growth and it's the same spiritually. We must fight and war in the strength that He provides. Scripture is clear - we are in warfare against the principalities and powers of darkness. Don't you want to know how to swing your sword properly? How to shield yourself effectively? How to give the enemy a deadly blow? I sure do! Teach me to war, Lord.

While we're on the subject, I put up a good fight this week. I added at least 15 to 20 minutes to my exercise time every day. I did my work on the treadmill, then on cardio days I ran down to our basement and jumped on the Norditrack (or the Sweatinator - it's new nickname). Whew! I was proud of myself, though. It was hard, but good. I love the feeling I get after I've had a really hard workout. On the days where I do circuit training, I disciplied myself and stuck to the routine. No short cuts and less breaks. Again, it was hard. I don't really like the feel of burning muscles. :-)

But, it was worth it! I broke through this week and lost a pound. Yippee! My new number for this week is 167lbs, and I've got my eyes on reaching number 166 next week. I've never gotten below 167, so that would be an awesome Christmas present! I learned this week that my plateau problem can be broken by working longer, which is what I suspected. 30 minutes a day isn't enough anymore. I've got to work for more like 45 -50 minutes, and the majority of that time needs to be in my "medium to medium hard" heart rate zone. That's where the heart is pumping steadily and the sweat is flowing freely!

Now, Christmas is on Thursday. (What's with holidays being on the day before my weigh in? I had this problem on Thanksgiving, too.) So I've again decided to weigh in a day early. I'm going to give it all I've got and see if I can't end this year at my lowest weight yet!

Fighting on ~ Bekah

New laptop...new beginnings...

2008-12-15T10:40:00.005-06:00

Most of you already know this, so this post is for the few people who may be uninformed. :-) I have been saving up to buy a laptop for the past 2 years, and I finally purchased one a few weeks ago. Yes, it's pink! And my hope is that now I'll have more time and opportunity to blog and (*gulp*) work on writing my book. The truth is, I feel very excited about this project, and yet very unqualified to write anything worth reading. It's so overwhelming...I have no idea where to start. I'm thinking that I need to find a book on how to write a book!

But seeing I don't have that available right now, I thought I'd do something else. Something to trigger a little bit more "readership participation". I have a few questions for you all! Please take the time to answer. If for some reason you don't want anyone to know it's you answering, just log in under anonymous or a guest.

1. Have you ever struggled with being overweight? or underweight?

2. Have you started on any specialized diets (Weight Watchers, Jenny Craig, Atkins, etc.) in an effort to lose weight?

3. If yes, were those diets successful for you? (Have you kept the weight off?)

4.When you look in the mirror, are you satisfied with your weight?

5. Do you consider yourself to be fit and healthy?

6. Do you exercise regularly?

7. What does your daily diet consist of?

8. Do you consider yourself - a. a health nut b. informed, but not crazy about eating healthy c. a junk eater?

9. Have you read any other books about healthy living or weight loss that you have found helpful? If so, what are they?

10. And finally, do you have any advice for me while I'm writing this book? Any specific topics you think I should address? What would you find helpful in a healthy living/weight loss book? What do you see are common struggles for those trying to lose weight and live healthy lives?

Okay, I'll stop now. I'd love to pick your brain even more, but I guess I wait and see if you all will even post answers for these. ;-) PLEASE DO! I wish I could offer some prize or an incentive, but I can't really. Just know that you're helping me out and your post will make me smile! (Yeah, I know. Pretty lame prize, huh?)

Thank you all! ~Bekah

Motivation...

2008-12-12T13:15:00.006-06:00

According to Webster's 1828 Dictionary, the word "motive" means - That which incites to action; that which determines the choice, or moves the will. Thus we speak of good motives, and bad motives; strong and weak motives. The motive to continue at rest is ease or satisfaction; the motive to change is uneasiness, or the prospect of good.

Have you ever wanted to do something, but lacked the motivation to actually do it? Or have you ever started a project with the intent of finishing it, but for whatever reason you didn't stick with it to the end? Maybe you've heard a speaker talk about a spiritual discipline or a character quality that you see is lacking in your life, and you decide that you need to do something about it. Your desire is to change! You leave the meeting emotionally pumped to go home and make changes, but somehow that desire fades....you realize how difficult change will be....you try your hardest, but it's not working.....you quit, feeling like a failing Christian and go back to your previous way of life....you feel guilty, because you know that you do need change in your life.....to ease the guilt, you compare yourself to others, and find that you aren't that bad - in fact, you're better than some other Christians you know.......you put up a wall of pride in your heart, and try to ignore your problems.......until a few months later, you go to another meeting and hear a speaker........

And the cycle continues. I've been there - have you? We all have this problem in regards to spiritual changes (we're in a fight against our flesh), and also in the every day physical stuff (What do you know? We get to fight our flesh again!). I don't know about you, but I have plenty of unfinished projects laying around my house. There's the cross-stitch penguins I began when I was about 12 years old. I didn't finish it because I somehow got off a line so nothing would match up. (The red heart between the two penguins didn't fit, and made it look like the two love-birds were squishing it. Their beaks had a funny zig-zag line, instead of a straight triangle. It wasn't pretty, folks!) But, I didn't want to pull out all of the hours of work I'd invested in it to remedy my mistake, so I gave up, and put it in a bucket under my bed.
And I can't forget the blanket I've been crocheting for the past three years. I wanted a nice blanket for my bed, especially when it gets cold this time of year. I told my mom, "This is the year I will finish it!". That was a few months ago, and I haven't touched it yet. (Maybe I should stop blogging and go find that thing!)

The point is, we all need motivation! We all have things we need to begin working on, continue working on, or put the finishing touches on. And if you asked me what the 2nd most common question I get asked, directly or indirectly (the first being, "So, how do you feel now?") it's this: "How do you stay motivated?". People want to know! How is it that I can keep going? How is it that I have been consistent in my exercising for over a year? How is it that I've been able to stay on the "healthy eating" wagon this long and not fallen off?

You see, when we start something new, it's exciting! We often experience an emotional high. We can just picture the end result, and oh, won't it be great? We start off full speed ahead, anticipating the moment when we will get the desired result. What a glorious moment that will be! We can easily become all consumed with this new project, giving it every spare minute of our time. And things are going great!

Great, that is, until we hit a bump in the road. Maybe you've been so excited about how the Lord has been working in your life, and you've been obedient to His voice as He's molded and shaped you. But now He's asking something else of you. Something He's never asked before. Something hard. You come to a screeching halt as you now have to make a decision. There's a fork in the road, and you're not sure which way you want to go.

Or maybe you're like I was only a few months ago. You're trying to get into the habit of exercising, and so far you've done pretty well. But then, your schedule changes unexpectedly and you can't seem to fit it in anymore. Or maybe you're not getting the results you want quickly enough.

Maybe you are notorious for starting household or craft projects, but not finishing them. Maybe you're struggling to keep your house organized. You may have closets overflowing but you just can't get motivated to tackle them. Maybe you're finding it difficult to spend time daily in the Word and prayer. You just don't feel motivated to do it.

What should we do? Where can we find motivation? How can we break this cycle of starting but never finishing? Because that's not the kind of life God intended us to live. We are challenged in Scripture to become more and more like our Lord every day - and He never gives up on anything or anyone. Can you imagine what the world would be like if God just stopped creating things because it wasn't "new" to Him anymore? What if He had an attitude that said, "Yeah, I guess that's good enough. All this work is making me tired.". We might not have fish, or mountains, or waterfalls, or stars, or broccoli!
Or what if Christ decided to call the angels to assist Him while He was on the cross? What if He decided that to sacrifice Himself was too hard? What if He left that job unfinished? He could have just used the excuse, "Well, I'm just not a very motivated person.". Why not? We do.

My friends, the answer to solve our motivation problem isn't to dig deep inside ourselves and find some "inner motivation". We might do alright for a little while working with our own strength, but remember where that has gotten us in the past? We have to turn to Jesus! We have to unite our will with His will and unite our motives with His motives. Because my flesh can only motivate me to be more fleshly. Bekah can not change Bekah. Bekah will continue to be Bekah as I am now unless some outside force intervenes and gives me both the power and the motivation to change. I could try and motivate myself in different ways. My motivation to lose weight could be to fit into a certain size, or to weigh a certain amount by a certain date. But if my motivating factor is something physical (i.e. beauty or praise of men), I will fail in the long run. That's not enough to keep me going when the bumps come.

To be honest, if I didn't have my eyes focused of Jesus and His perfect will for my life (which includes my health), I would have given up long ago! Especially now that I've been in the "plateau stage" for the past few months. The scale isn't telling me what I want to hear....but God is. He's telling me to keep going, to keep pushing, to keep drawing closer to Him and learning how to walk in the Spirit. So I'm continuing on; I'm pushing forward. My motivation is to do the will of my Father. And praise His name, He's giving me the strength to accomplish that.

Motivated by Him ~ Bekah

P.S. Oh, yes. Today is Friday, isn't it? Well, I weighed in at 168 again. Good grief! I've been so steady these past few months. The only problem is that I'm not trying to maintain - I need to keep losing! So, I'm going to continue with the added cardio this next week and hope to break through this silly plateau.

2008-12-10T20:43:00.003-06:00

Pretzels covered in almond bark and sprinkles. Russian tea cakes. Chocolate cake box cookies. Butterscotch goodies. Peanut butter spread on Ritz crackers and then dipped in chocolate. Our kitchen table was covered with these traditional desserts this afternoon!

Is your mouth watering? Tis the season for sweets...more sweets than you can count! The recipes are endless. Each family has their special cookie traditions, and mine is no different. Everyone pitched in today, mixing and dipping, dunking and licking. We had to keep a close eye on my younger sisters, who thought their job was to taste everything!

I did not taste anything; I just munched on a few pretzels while watching. And I was okay with that. If there's anything I've learned in the past year it's this: food isn't worth all the attention and praise we give it. It just isn't! You've seen the commercials; you've heard the marketing slogans. "Betcha can't eat just one!" "It's to die for." The chocolate cake is "sinfully delicious". We wouldn't be watching the commericals and hearing the slogans if they weren't effective. The "lust of the eyes" often leads us astray. I mean, seriously - how many times have you seen a picture of ice cream and then suddenly got a craving for something sweet? Or seen a juicy burger and thought, "That really looks good! I'm going to go find something to munch on.". We've put food up on a pedistal, made it an idol. Our eyes and our emotions can get us into trouble if we're not careful. Do we eat when we are truly hungry or simply because something looks good?
It's ridiculous as I think about it now, but that was part of my way of thinking 12 months ago. I remember eating a snack just because I was bored, or stuffing myself at the dinner table when I felt stressed. It was an unconscience act, because I was so blind as to how my actions were linked to my emotions. I say it's about time that we as Christians put food back in it's proper place. Food is God's provision of nourishment for our bodies. Plain and simple.
Does that mean I don't enjoy food? Absolutely not! Delicious meals make my mouth water just like your's. Why do you think God created so many different kinds of food? He wants us to enjoy them. Just not too much...not when we cross over from enjoyment to idolatry. Food and eating food should not consume our thoughts, it shouldn't be the thing we run to when our emotions are out of control - Spirit control. That place is reserved for God alone. And if it's not, then "Houston, we've got problems."

And I know that some of you who read this blog don't struggle in the same why I do. You're not trying to lose weight. But don't think you're off the hook! Food may not be a struggle, but that just means that something else is. We all have struggles, and we need to face them with the strength and grace that God so freely provides...and go smashing down some idols!

In closing, here is the recipe that I followed to make my hummus dip. When I searched for recipes online, I found hundreds! I just picked one and tried it, and I liked it a lot. If anyone has a different hummus recipe that you use, please post it! I want to try different kinds and see which is my favorite.

-3 cloves of garlic, minced, more if you like
-1/4 cup plain lowfat yogurt (don't worry about the "lowfat" - use what you want)
-1 tablespoon lemon juice
-1 teaspoon olive oil
-1/4 teaspoon salt
-1/4 teaspoon paprika
1/8 teaspoon pepper
1 (19 ounce) can chickpeas, drained and rinsed
1 tablespoon fresh parsley, chopped

Combine everything in blender or food processor and process until smooth. (The blender gives the best result.) If you need more liquid to make a nice consistency, add a bit more yogurt. Chill. Serve with pitas or as a veggie dip.

Happy smashing! ~Bekah

Post on the run...

2008-12-07T19:25:00.004-06:00

After my last post, this will probably seem pretty short. It's not that I don't have much to write; it's that I don't have the time right now!

On Friday, I weighed in at 168 pounds. Hmmm.....does that number sound familiar to you??? Yes, well. I'm planning to give it my all this week and see that number go down again! Oh, and I never posted my weight the day before Thanksgiving, as I decided to weigh in a day early. It was 169, so I'm slowly going down again.

My plan this week is to change up my exercise routine in an attempt to outsmart my body! I still don't quite understand why I'm having so much trouble losing these last 18 pounds, but I'm doing everything I can think of to keep the scale moving lower. So, I'm going to keep doing my rigorous workout on the treadmill, but then I'm going to head down to our basement and do an extra 10/15 minutes on our old Norditrak. I might jump rope, too. Who knows? I kinda make it up on the fly. :-) Anything that makes my heart pound and my body sweat!

So, there's my tiny update. I made some yummy hummus this week! Maybe I'll post the recipe later this week. My family tells me that I smell like a garlic clove.....but it's worth it! :-)

I also wanted to say "Thank you!" again for all of your encouraging comments, either on the blog or to me in person. They mean so much to me! I can't tell you how many times God has used your words to cheer me up and keep me motivated. As I've written many times, this has not been easy, so I really appreciate your encourangement. You are all such a blessing!

Staying positive because of Christ (and you, too!) ~ Bekah

Open Thy Mouth Wide...

2008-12-01T15:04:00.007-06:00

I am the Lord thy God who brought you out of the land of Egypt; open thy mouth wide and I will fill it." Psalm 81:10

I've been thinking about that verse a lot this week, and spending time meditating on how it applies to me. We know that Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever - so I know that His promise to fill a mouth wide open is still available to me!

But, it wasn't until I was in bed last night that I realized the real reason why I kept thinking about that verse, and why it kept popping up in my mind. The Lord is so patient with this blonde! Whenever it would come to mind the past few days, I would just think, "Yes, thank you, Lord. You are all I need!". And, that's true. But it was time to dig a little deeper into that verse. Time to put it into to practice in a very tangible way.

I was reading last night before turning out the light. I've been slowly working my way through the book, "What the Bible Has To Say About Healthy Living" by Rex Russell (M.D.). It's an excellent book so far, and I highly recommend it! But anyway, I happened to be reading through a chapter where the focus was on fasting. Yes, that's right. Fasting.

Now, I have fasted before. But I can count on one hand the times that I've done it. Why? The same reason you don't do it very often either! It's not very pleasant at all, at least from a physical standpoint. It means making a sacrifice and giving up (for a time) something your body relys on to function correctly, namely food. Not my most favorite thing to do!

So, I was laying there, reading about all of the physical and spiritual benefits of fasting, and thinking to myself, "Wow. That's pretty neat. When Jesus told us to fast, He made sure there were benefits for us, that it wouldn't just be a painful, religious experience. Not only do we have sweet fellowship with Him while fasting, we also are giving our bodies a time to cleanse and heal. Awesome! I'll keep that in mind.........for whenever I decide to do it again.".

And that's when I heard it. That still, small voice gently spoke to my heart, "I want you to fast.". What? Now, wait a minute! Just because I happened to read a chapter on fasting doesn't mean that I'm supposed to fast. God is not interested in me fasting out of guilt or because I feel pressured to do so. That probably wasn't even Him speaking at all, it was just my thoughts.

"Bekah, I want you to fast." Okay, I heard that one loud and clear, Lord. (And now the excuses began.) But, Lord. I can't! It's not fun. I can't afford to go a day without eating - all of the weight loss books say you must not skip meals! I don't want to mess up my weight loss for this week. Besides, it makes me grumpy. And when I'm grumpy, I'm not a good representative for You, now am I? And, what am I supposed to tell my family? I'm not really fasting for a specific reason, so what do I say? Just that You told me to? I don't know. Can we maybe set up another time if You really want me to do this? At least give a little time to prepare for it? How about sometime next week. I could just skip lunch or something.

"I want you to fast tomorrow." Tomorrow!?! Not tomorrow! That's too soon. I'm getting hungry just thinking about it. "Obey, Bekah. That's all I ask. Just obey.".

By this time, I was having some serious problems with crucifying my flesh and getting control of my thoughts. I began thinking of ways to try and make both my flesh and the Lord happy. I'll just fast breakfast.....or would lunch or dinner be better?......No, I'll fast until dinner.......or maybe I should fast the whole day......or maybe I could just fast from a specific thing, like carbs.......I really should fast the whole day.....or what about fasting breakfast and dinner and eating lunch?..........Hmmm, so many options.

It took me a few minutes, but I finally quit fighting and came to the conclusion that there really was only one option. Obedience. Alright, Lord! I give up. I'll fast tomorrow...the whole day. And once I made my decision, that verse came floating into my mind once more, and the Lord showed me why it was on my mind so much, why it wouldn't go away. It was time for me to put into practice what I said I believed. Time to let go and trust the Lord to fill my open mouth. Time to be reminded that all I really need is Him.

As I'm writing this, I'm in the middle of my fast. And today has been wonderful. I spent time in the Word and prayer this morning, and began working on memorization that I've let slip in recent months. It's been a day of sweet fellowship with Jesus. Sure, I'm hungry! But I've learned and re-learned a lot today, important things that I all too easily forget. I've put my focus back where it needs to be, on my Lord and Savior, and I've been reminded that the Lord does give you the strength you need to do what He's called you to do.

Now, please don't read this and think, "I feel like an awful Christian because I don't fast.". It was not my intention to write this and make you feel guilty! And it was also not my intention to write this and somehow puff myself up. Far from it. Listen to the Lord and do what He tells you to do. As I was reminded today, it's well worth it!

Opening my mouth ~ Bekah

Happy Thanksgiving!

2008-11-26T15:03:00.002-06:00

Are you one of the millions of people looking forward to a nice, big meal tomorrow? All over the country, our tables will be filled with yummy traditional foods like turkey, potatoes, fresh rolls, cooked vegetables, pie, and more. This holiday meal is like no other!

So, let's say you're in the same boat that I am - trying to lose weight. What's a girl to do? You know how long it's going to take you to work off all of the calories in the food, but it looks SO good! Should you eat anything, or completely stay away from it? And, how do you balance yourself so that you don't eat too much?

This is going to be my little strategy for the day, because as I posted earlier, I'm not going to avoid the food all together. It's okay to have a "non-weight loss" day every once in awhile! I know that after tomorrow, I'm going to get right back on track. Eating different food tomorrow is not going to sidetrack me and keep from continuing onward. But, I am going to set up some boundaries for myself, as I know from personal experience that I can't be trusted. :-)

First, I'm going to eat a normal sized breakfast that's loaded with fiber and protein to keep me satisfied for longer.
Second, I'm going to drink more water than usual, which will help to flush excess calories out of my body and keep me properly hydrated.
Third, I am not going to come to the table starving! I'll snack appropriately a few hours before the big meal to ensure that I don't have the "eyes-bigger-than-the-stomach" problem.
Fourthly, I'm going to explain to my family what I feel is okay for me to eat, and have them keep me accountable. This includes telling them portion sizes, too! While not the easiest boundary to set, they have been pretty good cops for me and saved me from many a disastrous meal. :-) And fifthly, I'm going to keep perspective. My stomach is only so big, and it's not designed to be stuffed! Food is not going to satisfy me or make me feel better after eating it, so I can shut down that lie early on. Just because food is readily available and it's okay for me to eat it doesn't mean I need to. By God's grace, I'll stop eating when I'm satisfied -even if there are a few bites of pie left on my plate. (Oh, help me, Lord!)

That's my plan, and I'm sticking to it...with the help of the Holy Spirit. In family gatherings past, I've often eaten too much and left feeling less than comfortable, which makes me feel grouchy and irritable. But I'm believing that this year is going to be different! I'll look forward to leaving satisfied and not guilty, as long as I cooperate with Jesus!

This is the time of year that people put on weight, which makes it all the more difficult for someone trying to lose it! Never a thought about fruits and vegetables, our baking is dedicated to sugars and fats, carbs and more carbs. No wonder people can get so grumpy and stressed out during the holidays! If I were their body, I'd complain, too. We overload our systems with junk, and then wonder why we keep catching colds and getting sick. Or why we feel so tired and lack energy. Or why the scale keeps going up and up....... HELLO!!! I'm a blonde, but I can figure this one out.

I'll get off my little soapbox now. :-)Thanksgiving is a time to reflect on the goodness of God, and give Him all of the thanks and praise we possibly can. He truly is good, and His blessings are abundant. When I think back to where I was at (physically, emotionally, and spiritually) last Thanksgiving, it makes me tear up with gratefulness to my Lord who is so faithful and patient with me. What a blessing good health is!

Are you in good health right now? Thank Him for it, and live like you're grateful for it. (Don't ask Him to bless the Cheetos you eat, okay? I don't think He can...:-)) Or, do you want to make changes so that you can enjoy good health? Then thank Him for His grace that allows you to start fresh today, and do what He tells you to do.

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving everyone! ~Bekah

What goes up must come down!

2008-11-23T21:12:00.004-06:00

This week, I was very determined. Very focused. Very confident. Most often, when I have a week where my weight balloons up, the following week I plummet back down. And that was the case this week! I lost 3 pounds, so I'm back to 168lbs.

But, I don't want to make it sound like I had an easy week. It wasn't easy! I pushed myself a little harder, a little longer during the 3 days I do cardio only. I ran up our stairs multiples times, did hundreds of step-ups on a stool, and did jumping jacks to keep my heart rate up. No time for relaxing during a workout! I want to make my time and effort worth it. :-)

Thanksgiving is this Thursday, so I've decided that I'll weigh in that morning, even though it is a day early. Every day counts with weightloss, so I'm not sure what will happen on Thursday, but I guess I'll just find out. I know that I don't want to weigh in the day after my "cheat meal"! That might not be pretty.

On another note, my "time of the month" began on Friday night, which always makes things interesting. I was planning to get up early on Saturday morning to exercise before we left for the day, but I wasn't feeling very well (aka cramps) and had spent several hours awake that night. I really wrestled in my mind about whether or not to get up and jump on the treadmill. I wanted to sleep!!! I spent a few minutes laying there, weighing the pros and cons and I almost made up my mind to just stay in bed and sleep. (I'm so good at making excuses and rationalizing my behavior...) But, I finally decided to roll out of bed and even though I was only able to spend about 15 minutes on the treadmill, I was able to go throughout the day without feeling guilty about skipping a workout. Hurray! I don't think I burned very many calories, but it was more than I would have sleeping. :-)

I find it rather fascinating what my body craves when it's "that time of the month". This time - it's been all about carbs!!! Oh, bummer. I already struggle with that enough...our homemade bread has been calling my name all weekend! But at least I'm not craving chocolate, seeing I can't have that right now. I'm just trying to control my carb intake and not let it get out of hand!

More later ~Bekah